My boyfriend always initiates sex, how can I start initiating it?

Question

I'm very conscious of this and we have a great active sex life but over the years we have just got into a routine. I'm also paranoid of being rejected. How can I start it off without looking like I'm desperate or looking like a fool?

Answer 1

If you have been together for years I'm sure he would love for you to take the initiative sometimes. It can be as simple as wearing sexy lingerie or just creating a mood with candles, If you don't feel comfortable with doing either of those things just be the aggressor and kiss him and rub on him when he is not expecting it. I know i love it when my gf is the aggressor sometimes. If you've been together for awhile I hope he wouldn't make you feel foolish.Good luck!

Answer 2

I have never known a man to look down on a women (girlfriend ) for initiating sex. ever. especially if it's your boyfriend. unless there are some other issues there like he needs to control you (which I hope you evaluate because he's not the best partner to have) and you are just insecure... try this.. start early in the day by leaving a little note somewhere only he can find that will get his mind racing with anticipation. when you see him that night don't let him speak.. tie a scarf around his eyes and lead him to the bedroom, couch wherever... massage him, undress him and do your thing. I wouldn't go to slutty until you know how comfortable he is with you taking the lead.
Take ownership and be in control of your sexuality. Chances are he is wishing you would take the lead as he perhaps feels the same way you do. I think it's a lot of pressure on men to always be the ones in control.

Answer 3

Men LOVE women acting forward. It may be intimidating on a first date or early on in a relationship, but once you have been together a few years- like you have- he will relish the thought!

I decided a few days ago that things were in a rut. We are moving home and theres a lot of change coming about. Its hectic and stressful and on top of it, I was ill for a month and it put pressure on my partner at work. I took the initiative, and bought myself a gorgeous lacy body suit. I wore in under my dressing gown and when we were cuddling on the settee, I started kissing him and then climbed onto his lap. He loved it, he loved the effort (YES men DO appreciate the effort we go to!) and we have been great ever since. What you do need to do is relax, there is no pressure or taboo over a woman making the first move. You don't need to act like a sex starved nympho maniac- why not start subtley.

French kissing is what we do when we first get with a partner, but it's one of the first things to go in long term relationships. Reignite that passion, kiss him long and deep and enjoy it like you used to. He will too!

Answer 4

First of all, a young woman initiating sex almost never gets rejected (I've assumed you're a at least a fairly young couple). Most guys would kill to have their girlfriend jump them.

As a beginner, you can start off with suggestive talk. Try this: On your next date, at an unexpected moment, lean over and whisper into his ear that you want him, or, if you're feeling adventurous, tell him exactly what you want to do to him the moment you've got him alone. That should get his engine going and set the mood for later when you finally get your make-out time.

Another way to ease into it is to initiate a kiss, and then let your hands roam over him once you get into it.

Answer 5

If you have a great sex life I don't see how you initiating can either cause a rejection or make you look desperate or foolish.
Just do what feels right; not eough women have the confidence to make the first move. You'll thrill the hell out of him.

Answer 6

I am assuming that you both are pretty young couple ?
if so just think about what are you best assets , the ones he has made comments on in the past.
then try just showing a little more than usual , he will soon catch on to what you are saying in body language.
foe example , if he likes your legs , then try a short skirt, let him walk behind you whilst you go up some stairs and deliberately let him see up the skirt.
Or try sitting opposite him in the skirt and deliberately keep swaying your legs see he can see up it.
If he is a breasts man then a low cut top whilst sitting opposite will get him ready.
All men have something that they just can't say no to.
Try going for a walk and telling him you have no underwear on , ,,, by the time you get back he will want to ravish you.
Just try and be a bit more flirting to him rather than just asking him for sex , that is the trick.
Good luck.

Answer 7

your wouldn't look like a fool he would probably love it.
When I initate sex I go and put some sexy underwear on then just walk into the room while hes watcing telly you may not need to do anything after that as he will probably jump on you but if not go over and pull down his pants let him lie back while you give him a treat,
If you just want to simply initiate sex while your laid in bed wake him up in the morning by sucking on his ****
Trust me he will love it and definately will not laugh at you, men love confidence so believe in yourself more, tell your self your gorgeous,
Good luck xx

Answer 8

Simply make sure he's indicating he may be in the mood, or at least is relaxed and have a great day. Begin with his chest, kissing, etc, and let his responses and your imagination go to work.
You probably already know his most sensitive spots. So... Go Girl, Go
Make his day (or night)!

Answer 9

How do u thnk he feels? He must be worried about rejection too.

Why dont u talk to him. If u have been with him so long surely u must know what turns him on

Answer 10

Prepare early , try wearing lingerie and confronting him when he leasts expecting it i.e when he is playing on computer or watching TV.
It is not really a good idea when he may be taking a dump though, wrong time, wrong place.