My mom is cheating on my dad?

Question

I know that my mom is cheating on my dad for about 4 years now. My mom stays at home the whole day but she leaves at 5pm and comes home very late at like12am or 1am. She's been acting cold towards me, my sister, dad, and younger brothers. She doesn't really buy us what we want because she's prolly giving away our money to that ****** jerk. When my mom picks us up at school, she always brings this guy with her all the time and she would always tell us that its her former classmate back when she was still in high school and she would also tell us that he's just helping her with our business and ****. My dad found out that my mom has been cheating on him and he didn't divorce her because he didn't wanna break our family. I know that my dad has a point but I can't stand seeing my dad getting hurt all the time. The worst is, I think that my mom transfered all the titles and all our wealth to her name. It's supposed to be both right? What can I do now? I really need help guys! =(

Answer 1

talk it out with both your mom and dad . it's no use having your family whole if it's causing all of you pain and probably in the long run poverty ............

Answer 2

There really isn't much you can do about it. Marriage counseling is most likely out of the question. A stint on Dr. Phil perhaps? Once the love is gone it is hard to get back especially now that your mom has feelings for someone else. If I were in your dad's shoes I would get a divorce. At least then he will have half of the wealth perhaps. I wouldn't be able to stand it if my wife was doing that. I'd talk to a lawyer and find out what my options are. Objects of wealth are still both your moms and your dads. They are married. Other than this what else can you do? Talk to your mom? Probably not. I'd probably talk to my dad and find out his viewpoint on this. At least then you can have some input into the situation. Is it really worth having your mom in the picture if she is treating you like a stranger, cheating on your dad, and hurting the whole family? I think your dad is hoping for a change, that's why he is hanging on. I know someone that is in this situation the other way around, and the wife will not divorce the father because of the children (and the money) she also fears starting all over again.

Do you want your mom back? You have to think of what you want. Talk with your dad and find out his viewpoint. Is it worth the pain? Does he still love her? If not, the answer is obvious. But if he does, then its going to be hard for him to let go.

Answer 3

Awww, a hug for you. You must be so full of mixed emotions at the moment. The important thing for you is to channel all the anger into strength so not make you ill, ok?
Your dad must be strong to want to fight for his family, and a lot of love for your mother.
Let me tell you something.
There is nothing greater than love and in love we will make many sacrifices. Your dad may see the sacrifice worthy to have his dream. It maybe an illusion but until he can see the illusion in his dream he won't and can't change it.
I would talk them both to express your own sadness-don't pretend to be something you're not because you need to release the emotions to live and accept the circumstances about you.
People do change, we all go into marriage with very good intentions but we do change over time, some for the better and some for the worse but we do have to allow them to make and learn from their own mistakes and in ALL mistakes lessons are learned and blessings are discovered and with YOU accepting the circumstances as your parents journey and you caught in it may help you to keep strong and accept it. We can't change things but we can learn to live with it, accept it and move on from it, something you need to do.
I wish you all the luck, your parents I so hope can resolve this like two mature adults and I so hope you and your dad can remain strong through a painful time.
Love and Peace xxx

Answer 4

Damn!!! I'm sorry hon!!! Ok, here's the deal. Your mom can't transfer any titles if both your parents names are on them. Two, try talking to our dad about getting a divorce and moving on with you and your sister. Hate to say it, but your mom sounds like a real selfish person, and she doesn't give a **** about her kids or her husband. She doesn't deserve you, your sister, or your dad.
Talk to your dad. Tell him it's what you and your sister want for him. And try to have a Happy Turkey Day ok??!!!

One Love,

TT

Answer 5

Ask your dad a hypothetical question. Say, "Dad, there's this minister who has a 43 year old wife and five kids, three sons and two daughters. The minister's wife is cheating on him, and both of the daughters have seen it. Do you think I (oops, I mean the oldest daughter) should tell you (oops again, I meant 'the minister') ?"

Answer 6

I hope you have a good enough relationship with your dad and with your mom so you can talk to them. not trying to be a counsellor but simply their child who loves them.

the worst is not transfering all the wealth and titles.... the worst is the lack of love between your dad and mom and your mom's cheating.... money doesn't mean much of anything....

it sounds stupid to many, but i would say that prayer is answer. pray that God will help, that God will give you wisdom and strength, that God will change the situation, that God will protect you and your brothers and sister....

certainly your dad and mom need help, counselling, healing, etc. but that is something probably that they will have to realize and take steps to get....

But I will pray for you now...

God bless!!

please email if you wish...

Answer 7

I'd say to back out of it as much as you can. Be supportive of Dad. And just lay low and let them work it out. If mother comes to you and wants to know why you been so quiet. Be DIPLOMATIC and tell her what you think about her dealings with this other guy. Otherwise. You just in a tough spot. Good Luck.

Answer 8

get both mum and dad in the same room and tell them , you know shes having affair ,but you would rather them split up then see your dad and the rest of your family suffer , that way you can pick who you want to live with , maybe then your mum mite see that this other guy ain't worth losing every thing for , good luck IL be thinking of you x

Answer 9

How could she have gotten away with transferring everythng into her name? It appears that she's a real betrayer and I think that you need to have a talk with your dad and encourage him to get a divorce in spite of this and hopefully he can get an attorney that will help. I don't know what to say.

Answer 10

Wow, I had it the other way around when I was your age, my parents sought counseling and got over it, but alot of families dont. You can only hope your Dad decides to confront her, or atleast asks her if she will seek counseling with him. If you are young, there isnt really much you can do as far as their relationship, they are the adults and need to work it out.

Answer 11

I think you need to sit down and have a private conversation with both of your parents. You need to tell them exactly what you said here but go into further detail and explain your feelings on what's going on. Explain to your father, especially how you're feeling about his feelings and what he needs to step up and do for you and your siblings & for himself.
Tell your dad that your mother isn't doing anything for your family, she's neglecting you & your siblings basic needs, she's neglecting his sexual needs (explain to him how he deserves happiness and a woman who'll love him and be faithful to him), etc.