I am married for six years with a five year old kid.Its a love less marriage without any respect for each other but we stay for the sake of our kid.But past two months i found this guy on net who is very caring, loving and sharing my same tastes.And i am attracked towards him very much that i started to chat with him all my free time and shared my fantasies with him.He pressurize me for sex but I am afraid it outside marriage.And then he was angry and told me I am not serious and killing my spare time with him.But now, my hubby found out my affair and he has all my private chat printouts with him .And he start accusing me and asks for divorce and tell me that he will show this printouts to my family. I am worried and stopped my chat with my lover at once and he also dont have any trouble to stop this and he tells me he likes me like his sister when i said about divorce. I am confused . Now my hubby wont love me ..What will i do ?Hubby tells me we will live together like strangers .
2006-11-22 20:07:41 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Is there a way to work out your marriage? Maybe start dating each other like you did. Marriage takes work and divorce shouldn't be the answer. But if that is what you are going to resort, to then so be it.
2006-11-22 20:17:14 · answer #1 · answered by Nikki 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have a mess on your hands. And the only one that can solve this problem is you and your husband. If the two of you are going to stay together for the sake of the child, this is very sad. A child is better off growing up in a home filled with the love of one parent and sharing time between the two, rather than the two of you in the same home and not getting along. You have to understand your husbands anger and pain. You have went outside of the marriage and have been on the Internet with a stranger. If the two of you are going to remain together you should try and get some marriage counseling. No one has cheated technically yet, you can save the marriage possibly. Many times within a relationship we become complacent and begin to take each other for granted. The two of you must remember what made you fall in love in the beginning. Good luck and God bless****
2006-11-22 20:14:37 · answer #2 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first mistake you made was staying in the relationship for the sake of the child. Children are more observant than anything and monitor the behavior of adults to know how to act. The child is going to see that there is a problem and become upset and confused. It would be better to get a divorce at this point. The next mistake was the affair, you were still married and so now you may have created more problems than neccisary. I can understand if you care for this other man but you should persue him AFTER your current relationship is officialy finished. If you want to try and save your marriage then I would recomend marriage counseling but other than that you would be much better off with a divorce.
2006-11-22 20:28:03 · answer #3 · answered by Chris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am 19 years old. My parents stayed together for the kids. And it was the most ridiculous idea I have ever heard of. Kids are alot more intuitive than parents give them credit for. If you are in a loveless and respectless marriage your child knows and is not getting the benefit of having two loving parents. You're defeating the purpose. Your child will be much better off with 2 happy single parents. Get out of this horrible marriage and then you can start chatting and meeting other people without worrying.
2006-11-22 20:13:46 · answer #4 · answered by Atypical 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unclear if your usband wants a divorce or to stay together....What I will say first of all is you need to repent, ask God for forgiveness and when he forgives you he will throw your sins into the sea of forgetfullness and NEVER remember them again. If you have not asked God to save you or you are saved and fell into this sin, you need to get that settled w/ God. Next I woudl repent to my husband, now the tricky thing is even if you don't believe he will accept it, you still need to do it, b/c u were deffinately out of order. Next if you all are trying or u r tryin got maintain the marriage somebody has got to start praying and asking God for help and seelk ministerial counseling or other forms of couple counseling, b/c I prmosie u all did not wake up 1 day and say, " i don' t think I love my husband/wife anymore" this was a gradual procession. If u wantit to work you got to give your life ot Christ and ask him to help you w/ your marriage. U and your husband got to talk, ask the Lord to give u what and how to speak w/ your husband about this. As far as the chat buddy, you can be and do and say anything you think or believe the person on the other end wants to hear. Sweetie your chat Buddy responded to u sexually b/c that's what u put out and when u pulled it back, of course it angered him b/c he has been grooming his conversations w/ u to get you into bed. In regards to yoru husband showing the emails, I say this....if he is going to show them to your family oh well. But I would think andpray you woudl have th etype of family that would not allow themselves to get that involved w. your marriage that they woudl look at those emails. U cannot let your life be held hostage by some emails/poor judgements. If man cannot forgive u and forget, but God can, u tellme who is greater, God ro Man????? As long as you get it right w/ God and try w/ you r husband thats all u can do. But don't let anybody ever try to hold your life, your emotions, your happiness/joy, your future hostage about some mistakes you made in the past. If God has forgive u who is man to try to keep you bound. God Bless.
2006-11-22 20:24:39 · answer #5 · answered by BEAUTIFUL 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It was not right of Ur net friend to pressurize you into having sex and then say he is like a brother.Reconcile with your husband as he already knows the truth. Tell him what made you go into this net relationship. If he is really a gentleman he would understand.
2006-11-22 20:18:04 · answer #6 · answered by M M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said it yourself, it was a loveless marriage.
If it was contrary, you would not have entered into a pseudo relationship with that guy whose only goal is to have sex.
Youre not happy, hes not happy, you cannot forever pretend that youre happy for the childs sake. Thats hypocrisy.
Find your happiness elsewhere.
2006-11-22 20:12:29 · answer #7 · answered by globiaeon 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Get out now. You have one guy that controls and another one that was no better.
2006-11-22 20:11:21 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
just move on...this is life..
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2006-11-22 20:11:22 · answer #9 · answered by c g 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well... sorry to tell you, your choices sucks!.... just get out, just be alone for awhile....
2006-11-22 20:15:37 · answer #10 · answered by Morena 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋