About a month ago we went to a wedding (my hubbys side of the fam) I met his aunt, who seemed really nice. I only had one conversation w/her making small talk. I told her I was going to do a "mommy & me" swimming class w/my 1 yr old. She told me they shouldnt do swim lessons untill age 4. I told her it wasnt a class, just play time in the water, me holding him the entire time. Anyway, I got a package from her in the mail today. She sent me the Super-Nanny book as well as an article torn out of a mag about the reasons you should not put kids in swim lessons until age 4, AND she circled it and highlighted parts!! I am so insulted by this. First of all I have seen that show (supernenny) and my kids DO NOT act like that!! They are well behaved and I have taught them good manners. I am insulted and a bit angry, as I spent no more than 20 minutes with this woman! My hubby thinks I am overreacting. Am I? I would never even give my best friend that book unless she specifically asked for it.
2006-11-22 14:28:48 · 28 answers · asked by Cris Tee 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
You have every right to be angry!!! If it had been me, and she had caught me on a GOOD day, I would have sent the "gift" back with a note thanking her for her intentions, but very politely telling her to butt out. If she'd caught me on a BAD day, I would have sent it back with a note saying "funny....I don't recall your being there during conception."
2006-11-22 14:43:56 · answer #1 · answered by CW 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm interested in why they shouldn't learn to swim till 4.
I have 3 girls 7, 5 and 2. my older 2 can swim enough to get themselves out of trouble if they fell in a pool etc. I really want my 2 yr old to learn this summer, we will be at the swimming pool alot as its very hot were we live. So many kids drown cause they are not taught to swim. Have fun at your swim class. As for the super nanny book, put it in the back of your cupboard. You may need it one day, might not be for your children. I think sometimes older people think they are being well intentioned, they dont realise that parenting these days is different and for good reason!
2006-11-22 22:48:16 · answer #2 · answered by lividuva 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some people are so rude! I have in laws like that, they want to be helpful, but don't know how and end up saying hurtful things. Do what you want to do and don't let her upset you. I'm sure she was trying to be helpful in her insensitive, overbearing way. I'd send the book back with a super sweet note of how you think it was sweet of her to think of you, but you and your family are doing great and that your parenting style is working out extremely well for your family and that you'd never get around to reading the book as swimming lessons takes up your extra time. You can also tell her that someone you know had a child that didn't put him in the water for swim lessons until he was six years old and the child is now 16 and still afraid of the water. It's better to get them in the water and comfortable with it as soon as you can is my opinion!!!
2006-11-22 22:47:18 · answer #3 · answered by historygirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think she was trying to be rude. I think she sees you as part of the family and that is why she felt it was in your best interest to have you see a different point of view. It would have been rude if she had called your husband and told him about her point of view on the matter and why you should not take your child. Basically what you should do is call her and tell her thanks for sharing the info with you but you decided to do what you wanted. Next, you should take pictures and even videos if possible to show amongst family. That way she will see that older people arent always right and us younger parents can make right decisions too. You got to remember too that older people were more scared and superstitous too so maybe that's why she is acting this was.
2006-11-22 23:51:14 · answer #4 · answered by osito 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Choose good intentions! It is much better to feel that someone has good intentions, after all there are much easier and more direct ways to be rude.
The lady may think very highly of Super Nanny and therefore it is her go to source and it is likely an article that was fresh in her memory and seemed relevant due to your story. True not everyone has the best tact or even makes the right move but as awkward as it was for you, thank her for making an effort and stick to your plans.
2006-11-22 22:46:18 · answer #5 · answered by Mere Exposure 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
re gift the book back to her at christmas (one less to buy!) with pictures of the 'mommy and me' day.
BTW i was in the pool the day i came home from the hospital. (as were ALL of my brothers and sisters) babies can swim because they're USED to being in a lot of water. (only up to a few weeks old this can be done) blow in the face and they will stop breathing for a few seconds and will swim.
i was also diving off the high dive at 4 (belly flopping. i liked the feeling)as well as swimming the length of the pool so swimming lessons were a bit juvenile for me at that age.
2006-11-23 06:52:53 · answer #6 · answered by craina c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would be insulted too. Some people don't know how to butt out of other people's lives. It's your kid, you know what you're doing. I would tell her thank you for the concern, but swim class is going fine and you don't have a need for the book. Or you could just not thank her for it, but that'd be rude. I'm sure someone has a tactful way to handle this.
2006-11-22 22:47:04 · answer #7 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I went to swimming lessons at 4 months old, so did my sisters, and now so have my sister's three little boys. Definitely do it! You reduce hugely the chance of your baby ever drowning, and make a confident swimmer - resutling in a much more fun childhood!
She is very rude, interfeering and wrong! Go for it.
2006-11-22 22:35:54 · answer #8 · answered by Fi B 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
OMG...i find that insulting and you have every emotion to feel that way..my advice, let it go now and leave it as is..dont let her get the best of you..if you guys talk again, either dont mention it or act like you never received it..i would go for second option that way she will feel her time was wasted and you will feel much much better..obviously she was bored and had nothing better to do..only you know whats best for your own children..good luck...i totally am on your side..
2006-11-22 23:34:44 · answer #9 · answered by unsurelock 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's a *****! I wouldn't worry about it...he's your son...take whatever class you want. I wish I had done a mommy and me swim class earlier in life b/c I would probably know how to swim now. That was very rude of her to send you that article. You're not overreacting.
2006-11-22 22:48:28 · answer #10 · answered by tangyterp83 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not over reacting! I think would your doing sounds like fun! And I assume there are other people in you class who have kids the same age. Getting you son used to the water now and helping him get over a fear that may or may not develop later. Plus your bonding with your son which is NEVER wrong! She should mind her own business,seeing as she just met you!
2006-11-22 22:36:19 · answer #11 · answered by Kellie R 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋