help! my girlfriend always gets mad at me for no reason.?

Question

my girlfriend gets mad at me everyday for no apparent reason or a dumb one. she gets mad at me if i leave or i dont eat dinner with her family or if i get a better grade than her and this one time she got mad at me for not eating a ham sandwich and she knows that i hate ham. we have been together for a year and i love her and she loves me but i just wish she would stop getting mad at me all the time. i beg her not too and sometimes we end up having a big argument over a little thing and she ends up crying. but anyways im 19 and we dont have the money to get professional help or anything so i was just wondering what i should do?

sometimes i do walk away. once i had to walk like 5 miles back home because she got mad at me and i didnt have a ride. walking away doesnt really help because she would call me later and apologize and it might happen again. i love her too much and thats the only thing i have a problem with. id say im a pretty calm guy and can take more **** than most guys. i just want it to be like the beginning again with no problems.

Answer 1

It's very controlling behavior and not fair to you. You don't need to put up with it. The fact that you beg her to stop puts her in a position of power. It's important you stand up for yourself, and ask what is really bothering her, because it's not about a ham sandwich. She sounds very insecure. She wants you to fit in this little mold that she's made for you, and when you don't, she gets angry. If she simply doesn't like any little thing you do that's out of her control, you might need to rethink your relationship. I especially hate that she doesn't like you getting better grades than her. That's not healthy for you. Do you really want to be with someone that would rather have you fail so she feels better about herself? I see too many marriages like this. It's like they were allowed to get away with it as kids, and act like spoiled, selfish brats as adults because no one stands up to them. You've already played nice. Told her how it makes you feel, and she's not getting the message, or doesn't care enough to try. You need to tell her to knock it the hell off, or you're gone. And make good on it. Your future happiness relies on it.

By the by, there's a difference between love and codependance. You are *not* responsible for, nor have to feel guilty over her emotional well being. She apologizes only to make you come back. It's a vicious cycle. Best of luck. It's not easy.

Answer 2

There's no such thing as "little" when it comes to females.
When you left, she was probably having an off day and wanted to spend time with you and talk to you and be comforted - and you left.
When you didn't have dinner with the family, she may have been telling them all that you WOULD and may have planned the dinner and helped out and it was a time for everybody to bond - and you bailed.
If she MADE you the ham sandwich, regardless of whether you like ham or not, you probably didn't show any thanks for her making it. She was just trying to do something nice for you and you end up brushing it off.
Like I said .. no such thing as "little" for us girls. ;)
She may be having some inner emotional turmoil and just doesn't know how to get it out, so she's constantly on edge and frustrated and ready to break down all the time.
Talk to her. Find out if there's anything wrong. She'll appreciate the fact that you're trying to stay in tune with her emotions and are willing to sit down and talk about those kinds of things, even if there turns out to be NOTHING wrong.

Answer 3

This is really natural. I am a girl so i know how this women feels. She may have pressure on her which is causing pressure on you. Ask her and let her know you care tell her how your day went and how her day went. Ask her is there something wrong or do you have pressure on you. That's how I feel about her know about you. I feel your pain, shes putting pressure on you alot. And if my advice doesn't work or nothing really happens like the fighting a little then here's what you should do. I know this sounds hard but you might have to do it. Maybe you should break up with her or could wait even longer and take your chances of growing up together having kids and fighting all the time but then get a divorce and have your children go through a miserable life. I gave you my advice follow one of them . Which in case is either follow your heart or follow your mind.

Answer 4

It's not you. I think she may have some underlying problem/s. I know you have told her to stop. But maybe when she is in a good mood, you need to sit down with her and tell her how you are feeling. Ask her not to get angry, you just want to talk and reassure her that you aren't trying to break up with her, just in case she jumps to conclusions. You can't keep going the way you are so something has to change. Try that and see how you go. Hope it goes smoothly. I think you need to take control of the relationship and let her listen to you for once.

Answer 5

I'm wondering how you feel about spendding the rest of your life with this person... or whether or not you would like someone like her to be the mother of your children. Sometimes love isn't enough my friend. But if you want to hang in there you're going to have to sit her down and say enough is enough and simply don't engage her in these petty arguments. As soon as she starts to complain... walk away. And tell her this is exactly what you're going to do whenver you think she's being unreasonable. This doesn't mean you should cut off all communication (duh), but simply stop engaging her when she does these things to start an argument. And, ten years from now when you're married to her with children, don't say I didn't warn you.

Answer 6

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Answer 7

Hello wtfitsnguyen,

She's not going to change for you, man. You have already stayed too long and been abused by this girl. You are wasting your time with her. Dump her and find a girl who treats you better.

I know that this is harsh to say, but you have allowed this to happen for far too long. You need to learn to stop being a wimp. Now it's time to move on and find someone new. You are very young and you really don't need to settle for a girl who mistreats you. Don't do it.

Also, you need to check out the Tom Leykis radio show to learn more about what you should do. You definitely need to learn a little Leykis-101 to get more women in your life. Find out if this show is broadcast in your area. Here's his web site:

http://www.blowmeuptom.com

I hope that this helps you. Good luck and happy hunting.

--Rick

Answer 8

look. i'm emo. i see down points to a lot of things.
maybe she's really sensitive and takes things the wrong way.
i know i do a lot. but we work on it.
-if jealousy occurs.... make her think how happy she could be for that person, instead of sad or down.
call her a lot.- or do something spontanious and surprise her with something cute. it doesn't have to be big, but just give her more messages telling her you love her. it means a lot no matter how bad she is feeling.

Answer 9

Well bro keep calm im going thru same sitution whereby every day im just making self ready for arguements sometimes i do feel i pushing my self to much towards her when i can clearly see she never want to be surrounding me ,i try to fix a counseling for us but she was nof intrested

Answer 10

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