What would be the first thing you said to Jesus if you seen him in Walmart?

Question

I think i'd tell him that hair products where on aisle ## and gillette mach turbo's where on aisle##

Answer 1

Is God one of us? Just a slob like one of us?

Answer 2

"Welcome to Walmart....Can I help you?" You've been such a big help to me -let me show you around. Are you interested in anything in particular? Souls to save? I am sure there are plenty on each aisle..Come on, let's take a look, invite some people to your house for supper? Bread and wine? That sounds fine to me. Afterwards, we can go over to the hill and pray. I promise, I will stay awake...I won't go to sleep on you Jesus. I did go to bed early last night. And you woke me up nice and early - even though I didn't have to go to work. I'm thankful that I had this free time today and I'm really glad that I came into Walmart. I was going to Kmart - it's closer you know, but something told me ride on down a couple blocks...oh? Yes, I believe it was the Holy Spirit. It pays to follow directions, doesn't it? I think I'll buy some fish...oh, yes sir- I'd love to be a fisher of men. Can you help me with that? Thank you. I have really enjoyed my time with you here in the store. Please come back again. There's a big Christmas sale going on next week. I heard three wise men would be selling their frankenscense and myrrah and there will be a live performance by a little drummer boy. I'll see you then Jesus! Looking forward to your coming back again! I love you and I know you love me....

Answer 3

Get thee behind me Satan!!! Jesus will not touch the ground when He comes back for His brethren. This is the second coming, which is in the clouds of glory, and ALL of the saints will be resurrected at once, at the sound of the trumpet of God, at the voice of The Archangel (that is Michael/Jesus).

Answer 4

Jesus already knows where the hair products are & the gillette mach turbos are. So why tell Him something He already knows?

When I was last at Walmart, I asked God (Jesus) if I should get this or not get this for so & so. If I feel Joy in my spirit, I get the go ahead to get it. Love rejoices in the Truth. What is truly the best for so & so. If the Lord Jesus tells me not to get it, I don't.

Answer 5

I'm on the national Wal-Mart watchlist for stealing from wal-mart's alcohol section so often,I just can't help myself ,they put the vodka and the orange soda right next to each other and it's soooooo easy.

Answer 6

I'd tell him to stop lying about being Jesus.

When Jesus comes again he will come with the clouds and Great Glory. Every eye shall see him.

The nations of the Earth will piss themselves in fear and hide in the rocks.

Then he will poor out His bowls of wrath upon the whore of Babylon (yeah, that's you),

then he'll cast the whole lot of you into the lake of fire forever. -

Oh, yeah, I forgot to mention the part in Isaiah that talks about the wicked getting to see their children ripped apart in front of their own eyes.

Sweet dreams you pegan A$$ole's.

Answer 7

Oh man, you're back already?! I didn't think it would be this soon! I guess I should have lived a little better. Which way did you say I was going again? (sigh) I guess down it is.

Answer 8

Hmmm,. I guess I'd miss out on saying anything, because I never set foot in that store.

http://www.walmartmovie.com/

Answer 9

I will not see Jesus in Wal-Mart. I will see Him when He comes in the clouds with all His glory to take Me home to be with Him forever! You will see Him too, but will not be thrilled.

Answer 10

I would like to think Jesus would go to Target or anywhere other than Walmart, but where else would he find the white trash, other than the trailer park?

Answer 11

I'd say after dropping to floor, Lord, seeing you are ruler over the internets, can you recommend any good, cheap, software I can get, to teach me all this new fangled computer lingo?