Is it ok to be a mom AND work?

Question

Does anyone have any positive or negative thoughts on working moms? I have a 17 month old and a 9 week old. I've been at my job 8 1/2 years now, and I am on maternity leave right now. I am looking for a nanny right now. Will being a working mom hurt my children? My husband also owns two businesses very close to our home.

Answer 1

Don't feel guilty for supporting your family. This just goes to show
that you can be a good mom to your children and work your ***
off at work come home continue working at home until you get
ready to go to bed. You have proved to yourself and everybody
else that you can have everything and still be strong. Even if you
need a nanny that is okay because that only gives you a break
and lets you spend more time with you your children. I give you
the best of Luck. Keep Up The Good Work Don't Let No One
Put You Down!!

Answer 2

nothing wrong being a working mom if you have to.... In your case I don't see why you should work since your husband owns two businesses and you mentioned something about looking for a nanny? If you want to do something outside the home for the sake of getting away from being mommy 7 days a week 24 hrs. each day - then do something part time ... I think your kids need you during their formative years - not a full time nanny.

Answer 3

Personally, I strongly recommend part-time work for moms with small children. I would recommend 2 to 3 days a week. This way it is a win-win situation. The children get to socialise, but still have 2 or 3 days with mom, and mom gets to keep up her skills and have adult conversations, and can still be a mom 2 or 3 days a week.

I have 2 children, and I've always gone back part-time when the children were between 9 months and 1 year.

I would personally recommend that you wait till your 9 week old is a bit older, about 6 months or so.

Answer 4

I was a children's librarian (and working Mom of one) for over 11 years. I saw kids with Mom, Dad, Grandma, daycare providers, family friends, nannies, et cetera. I wish I could impress upon people the vast difference in kids who were able to spend time with either Mom or Dad or both on a constant, full time basis. They were SO much more advanced, intelligent, and seemingly happy and adjusted that ANY OTHER group of the kids mentioned above.

That being said, it IS a tough decision!!! Especially if you love your job. I work part time now and am at the midway point of my 12 week maternity leave. At this point, I simply can't fathom going back to a fixed schedule, leaving my baby with a virtual stranger (but professional) but thay paycheck IS calling my name. I can ignore it, but still. When I lived closer to family, that made things so much easier.

To answer your questions, yes it is OKAY but not ideal unless your priorities place your career before family... to be a mom AND work. Being a working mom won't hurt them but it is not the best, most optimal situation. If you can afford to stay home, you should and you can. The latest issue of Babycenter magazine (and a LOT of other really good sources) --- actually it is the issue you get if you subscribe to http://www.babycenter.com has an excellent article with pros, cons and real emotional situations dealing with the topic. One option is to ask to be kept in the loop at work and be given special projects instead of being a regular traditional employee, and this may have to be PROPOSED to employers... stuff like that is covered. OKAY, I've said enough.

Best wishes to you.

Answer 5

Take an honest look at your finances and what you bring in from your job. If you deduct the nanny's wages, your transporation costs, and lunch costs from your salary....is it enough to warrant somebody else spending 10 hours a day with your kids? Only you can make that decision.

Obviously you continued working after your first maternity leave, so what is the magical difference about having two children?

Answer 6

Yes it is okay. It is a personal choice that you and your husband can make together. You have a stable job that you have been at for a long time, that is tuff to give up. I do not feel that it will hurt your children for you to work. ( unless you are at work more than with your kids) As long as you spend more time with your kids than you do at work, that is fine. Your husband being close to the kids is great! That should make you feel more comfortable when you go to adjust to being a working mom with two children. I myself am a college student with a 7 year old and a 9 month old. I feel guilty leaving them but, in the end it will be worth it. I am still able to spend a great deal of time with my girls. As long as you have a nice balance, it should work out fine.

Answer 7

no, as long as you are still parenting if your going to have your nanny do all the work for you then yes it is bad because when a child spends most of their time with someone like a nanny they grow a bond with that person which can cause jealousy and regret when the child prefers the nanny over the parent. But on the other hand it is nice to get help as long as you are still doing all your parental duties which includes more than 1/2 hour of play time.

Answer 8

In an ideal world moms could stay home and enjoy raising children and keeping house but alas, some of us have to bring home the bacon too. As long as work doesn't become more or most important in your life than your family everything Should work out ok. Make sure you do a background check on anyone who will be with your kids as much as nannies and childcare providers are., and make the most of the time you can spend with the kids. QUALITY IS JUST AS IMPORTANT, IF NOT MORE SO, AS QUANTITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Best of Luck.

Answer 9

I also have a young child and a very demanding caeer. I would never give up my caeer because I enjoy it and I have worked very hard to get where I am today. I have a good baby sitter and I am pleased with her.

The bottom line is this...in 2006 staying at home with the children is a luxuary that very few of us can afford. The world has evolved into a place where it takes TWO incomes just to be comfortable.

As much as I love my child I also like my career and the independence it brings plus the ability to give my daughter a decent standard of life.

Answer 10

Well....by definition, if your a Mom then you work all the time...I assume that you mean outside the home though...If you have to to put bread on the table then do it...just try to set aside quality time with the munchkins and reaffirm your love for them....hang in there lady...I have great admiration...and a nanny will be infinitely better than a day care!!!