So yesterday i came back from school and opened the door to my room and my mom was in there and i told her, "mom? what are you doing?" And she said "just looking around". And i said "uh huh". And then she told me "is there something you wanna tell me" and i told her what do you mean? And then she showed me the pack of cigarettes she found that i hid in one of the cabinets and she said "look what i found". And then i told her "whered you get that?" And then she said "you know where i got it. I cant believe you've been smoking all this time" and i told her "i'm sorry, i just wanted to try it thats all, so can i have it back please". And then she said "no you cant have it back" and i told her "what were you doing looking through my room anyway" and then she threw the cigarettes at me and said "throw them away and if i find them again, i'm not giving you anymore money". Wasnt it improper etiquette of her to be looking in my room anyway?
2006-11-22 08:49:53 · 45 answers · asked by Andy 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
No it is her house and she is responsible for you and your actions. She is trying to bring you up in a proper manner and should be respected for that. So many parents don’t care what their kids do these days. Be glad that she loves you enough to care about your health and your future health. You are the one at foul here for hiding something that you did not want found out. Whether you are hiding things or actions it is devious and underhanded. ▬
2006-11-22 17:48:22 · answer #1 · answered by # one 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, as a Mother, I believe that your mom should not have been in your room looking around. However you do not say how old you are. I also wonder if your mom had asked you if you were smoking if you would have been honest with her, because it seems as though by the word :hid: that you would not have. Are you using the money that your mother is giving to you to buy the cigs? If you are under 18 than I would have a problem with that as well, but I would not be looking through your room. That is not how my daughter and I handle issues such as these. I would hope that now that you know that she is not happy with you smoking you would at least attempt to not smoke, or at the least not bring it into her house.
2006-11-22 09:10:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Improper ettiquette? Of course it is improper! Will I do the same thing when my kids are teens? If I suspect something, you bet I will!
Nothing should get in the way of good parenting.....not even ettiquette.
You know, since the day you were born, you have been your mom's most important "project." Some parents dive into that job with everything they've got. Others slack off and don't. I know you're pissed and when I was a teen, I would have been, too. Just know that she probably wants to raise you the best way she can. Finding cigarettes in your room is probably a sign of failure for her....her failure. No good parent wants to fail. She just loves you and is struggling to help you learn to do the right thing.
2006-11-22 11:42:06 · answer #3 · answered by fendor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you did say that you hid stuff from her ... like what? Obviously there is reason to be suspicious. She's looking out for your well being, and it IS her house. I doubt she would have cameras in your room - but if you're hiding things, then she must feel she has a reason to check up on you. I think, depending on what it was, that I'd do the same.
2016-03-29 05:56:42 · answer #4 · answered by Heather 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit yur whinin'. Make that mortgage/rent payment every month for about a year or two, pay the bills and buy some grub and you'll be able sit down in the living room,put your feet up on the coffee table,pop the top on a cold one, light up a smoke and throw your pack on the table with mom sittin' right there. But, and I'm just guessin' here, that ain't happened yet has it?
2006-11-22 09:01:33 · answer #5 · answered by Barry DaLive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, she is your mother. It doesn't matter if it is your room. She pays the bills and provides you with food, shelter, money etc. She has a right to know whats in her house and what may be going behind close door. This could be a sign that she does not trust you or she is seeing a change in your behavior that made her have to go through your room. No it wasn't improper etiquette. Look at those boys that had guns hidden in their room and their parents didn't know...and they ended up shooting up columbine. Their parents were criticized for knowing what was going on with their kids. She may just want to know whats going on in her house.
2006-11-22 08:59:57 · answer #6 · answered by naomijoan0615 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it was not. If she had been your roomate, then it would have been improper. However, she is your mother, and it is her JOB to look out for you. Regardless of if you like it or not (and I hated it when I was your age), part of "looking out for you" actually involves some "looking". She needs to communicate to you that smoking is bad for you, and if you don't give her that opportunity by speaking to her about it before you try it, then she has every right to call you on it. It is her house, you don't own that room, and she as a responsibility to know what is going on in her house, both morally and legally. It is improper of you to bring materials into her house that you posses illegally. Be happy that she cares enough to look, many kids don't have that benefit.
2006-11-22 08:55:54 · answer #7 · answered by Kevin P 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but no it wasn't. You should have hid them better if you didn't want them to be seen by your Mom. As an adult you might understand more that when you buy everything, you own it. Your parents own the house that you live in and they pay for you to have your own room and to eat at their table. Reading a diary is different for that is respecting your privacy, but this is concerning your health, which your parents are going to take interest in especially parents that really love you and don't want to worry.
2006-11-22 08:54:01 · answer #8 · answered by Hmmpphhhh 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you know she is right by what she did, it is her house, and it is actually her bedroom, that she is letting you use while your living there, her house her rules, when your old enough to leave then you make your own rules at your place, but until then, she says what goes on under her roof...sorry..it is the truth..
and by her looking in your room, she is doing her job, hey we all have Jobs, and if we all just do our job....a lot of actual problems would go away in t his world..your job is to do what she says, go to school get good grades, and stay out of trouble and out of jail so you can move out, get a good job, and be able to make your own rules in your own house, we all have jobs, an she was just doing her job and being a good parent, ( if she smokes, you could always tell her that the two of you will quit together ) family that's what is is all about
smile
good luck
2006-11-22 09:12:30 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, your room is in her house. She allows you to stay in that room until you move out. She has the right to go in there when and if she wants. If you had nothing to hide, then she wouldn't have found them (cigarettes). You know how she feels about smoking and she is trying to look out for you future.
2006-11-22 08:55:34 · answer #10 · answered by amckinney64 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋