My boyfriend and i have been together 5 years, and we will probably get married. Both of us are over 21. His mom knows we "do it" and even used to give him protection until I got on the pill. However, when we go to visit his parents house she tries (and succeeds) every time to make us go to bed by 11 and I have to sleep upstairs in one corner of the house and him downstairs in another. He never says anything, he doesn't want to fight. I'm not going to die if I'm not sleeping with him, but that's not the point. We don't visit his parents so we can sleep together, it just seems convenient b/c there is only one extra bedroom and he ends up sleeping on a really uncomfortable couch in a room with no heat. Is this the "my house, my rules" rule? She's controlling to begin with, but I don't understand why, if she knows we "do it" and have been for 5 years (sans baby thanks to her early prevention), why can't we share a bed?
2006-11-22 08:47:09 · 9 answers · asked by skinnieminnie_pippi 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
As ridiculous as it seems (and it IS ridiculous!), it's her home and she may not be comfortable with the two of you "sleeping" together (or otherwise) in her house. It's not so much "her house, her rules" as it is a matter of respecting her wishes. Though, I have to say,making a couple of 21 yr. olds go to bed by 11 is REALLY going too far! How does that even work? I can't imagine! Anyway, if I were you, I'd get a hotel room next time, maybe then you could stay up past twelve!
2006-11-22 09:25:53 · answer #1 · answered by wendy g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is simply done out of respect for her beliefs. You are not forced to stay there over night....go rent a hotel room. This will let her know how it is without being aggressive or confrontational. Nice visits with the family and then leaving at the end of the evening could be just what the doctor ordered for both of you! You are two grown adults and are making the choice to stay in her home and most people will show the up most respect for their parents personal beliefs. The only fix I see to this without causing an argument is the good ol' hotel room. This way you can all have your way!!!
good luck!!
2006-11-22 08:56:54 · answer #2 · answered by yidlmama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely the my house my rule thing in the beginning. But lets face it if she is not ultra-conservative (she isn't if she's handing out condoms) then you need to face her about what is going on. Because something obviously is. Talk to her honestly tell her about the conditions he sleeps in and that if it bothers about the sex that your both old enough to control yourselves.
Good Luck
2006-11-22 08:57:17 · answer #3 · answered by espressoaddict22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me like shes just being a b * i* t* *c * h... i mean come on this is 2006 and the days of not sleeping together at the parents is in the backseat !!!! specially if you are 21 like you said and dont go there to bop your man your there for a visit. i would confront her and tell her if i want sex ill do it at home i have respect for you in your home so i dont see what the big deal is...good luck girl
2006-11-22 08:52:07 · answer #4 · answered by maureen a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, for some people they are against premartial sex, and if that is the case with his parents then you need to respect that. After all it is her house. Or the other alternative is to call her on it and tell her how you both feel about it.
2006-11-22 08:54:19 · answer #5 · answered by skibunnie64 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is her home and she need to be respected. sounds like your boyfriend respects her enough not to say anything. Its only for a short time. She will like you more for respecting her wishes in her home. Or next time get a hotel room.
2006-11-22 08:53:47 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
her house her rules dont u think.... is not right what is she doing but well is her story if u feel bad why you guys dont go to another place aand like that if she asks well you guys tell her cause you would like to sleep together dont you think or talk to her explain your feelings maybe it would be better
2006-11-22 09:12:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe because you're her daughter she's worried about you or even possibly she doesn't think it's a good idea before marriage
2006-11-22 09:33:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess respect her wishes until you are married.
2006-11-22 09:07:07 · answer #9 · answered by SiLKy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋