Hello, family help please?

Question

Hi there.
Me, my dad and sister live together.
I am 12, my sister is 20..
Me and my sister never really get on, as she says that i don't help around the house. Ok, i admit i dont help around the house, but we're all CONSTANTLY MISERABLE ALL THE TIME.. my sister has a boyfriend, he doesnt have much of a personality, infact i find him a little boring. Me, im ALWAYS BORED, in the house, ALWAYS ON THE COMPUTER, a very lazy person I am... but i don't seem to find it very easy not to be. My dad, he tries to be happy (even though we all have our miserable moments sometimes.)
# Can you please give me some advice how to brighten up the family, permanently, please?? It's beginning to become a little depressing! Please help me?

Answer 1

i think you need to start helping around the house a bit more, there probably holding a grudge at doing all the work for you wen your old enough to do it by yourself, that should improve things between you and your sister, make an effort with her boyfriend, maybe suggest the family do something together, e.g go for a meal, bowling, ice skating, cinema, laser quazer something fun and that you dont do every day.
and i know this sounds weird are you on medication? only i was on medication ant it made me well depressed and fornd it hard to cheer up, it wasnt until i came off that my mood lifted and felt like the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders, if you are then i'd suggest seeing your doctor for alternatives.
good luck

Answer 2

sorry there is no help here because you said you will not and do not want to help in any way, from your question I am thinking you sit back and see some thing and feel that you have the right to criticize it, for instance you sisters boy friend, What does he have to do with you, nothing and yet you feel it is all right to find fault with him. It also appears that you feel that it is up to every one else to keep you happy and entertained and they are not doing a very good job ot that either. I will tell you a fact of life if you need some one or some thing to make you happy you will always be miserable. You are just about an adult, and playground rules do not apply here any more, respect responsibility,and sharing the work load do . so get off you chair and give your sister a hand, she is not your mother and in fact have to do any more around the house than you feel you do, but she has grown up and accepted the responsibility, and is only Trying to teach you

Answer 3

Tell everyone in your family that they've all got to try.

My family was also the same until a few people grew up, one or two moved out (though they still spend a lot of the time with us)

basically, we all realised that we're not always going to be together the way we are now. It's probably the same with you. you won't always live together with your dad and your sister so you've got to get them to enjoy the time that you have together.

If you're going to spend the next six to sixteen (or whatever) years together you'd better all try to enjoy it because being miserable for all that time is just depressing.

try to get them to go out more as a family: cinema, theatre, theme parks, whatever... remind everyone that you love them, what I do with my sisters is call them as if i'm goign to ask a favour & then say "i love you!" it works, almost every time, especially if they feel bad at me.

if all you try enough to do the chores quickly and have a night in, or help e/o (each other) if someone's feeling mopey then you'll all enjoy e/o's company instead of being sad all the time like we were too.

good luck! i'm pretty sure your family will agree with you when you talk to them.

Answer 4

Considering that Christmas is coming, now is the time to be happy and cheerful. Why don't you make sure that this year you have the best Christmas ever, by buying serious presents that everyone likes and wants and silly and joke ones as well.

Why don't you suggest to your sister that you go shopping together in order a buy your dad a present and hopefully by doing this it will bring the two of you together and you will have fun doing that.

Why don't you spend a less time on the computer and talk to your dad and suggest that the two of you play cards or play a game of something or just go out together. I dare say that if you make the effort your dad will really appreciate it and he will be happy

Answer 5

You poor little thing. You only 12 so i guess you wouldnt do much around the house. I know I didnt when I was 12.

What about visiting your friends house a bit more often or having your friend round to yours. I am guessing that your parents are divorced in which case it must be hard for your dad to be coping with 2 daughters aged 12 and 20 as he is the only one bringing in the money to pay the bills etc.

When I was 12 my mum had just died and so it was just me my dad and my sister who was 16. I look back and feel guilty now cos I know how hard it must have been for my dad trying to cope and put on a brave face.

All I can say is go easy on your dad and just do what makes you happy. If its the pc then fine at least your not hanging around on street corners !!!

Answer 6

Okay.........the age difference between you and you sister is quite wide so your sister will probably be feeling like she has to keep everything together. he will porbably resent you always being on the computer, and as you admit lazy. But you are also bored.
So..........here's a novel suggestion.......you are old enough now to be giving your sister some help so why not have a chat with her and your dad and share the responsibilites.
I suppose I am thinking....you could take responsibilty for keeping your room clean and tidy. You could ask your sister to show you how to use the washing machine. You could share the washing up with her..........one wash and one dry. Or even have that on a rota which includes your Dad.
You all could agree a rota for hoovering.........lots of possibilites ...........you can probably even think of some for yourself.
Regardless of what you think of your sister's boyfriend......have you ever thought that she's doing all the work and has little 'me' time whilst you seem to have so much 'me' time that you are always bored.

Answer 7

You are a difficult age but which i mean that it is hard for you to go out alone or even with friends, but you can certainly try to make home life better.

Call a meeting with your dad and sister and see what ideas everyone can come up with.

Eating together, putting flowers in the house, arranging to all go out together to do something you all enjoy, girllie night with your sister, cinema just you and dad etc.

Can you have friends round? sometimes?

Help your sister and dad around the house. Maybe work a rota so you all have certain jobs to do.

But the first thing is - tell them how you feel and how you want things to be different.

Good luck!

Answer 8

seems that your all doing things separately...why not get together as a family...say once a week...get some games out and have some fun...or go out somewhere together...and you my dear...get helping round the house, your sis will not nag you then....even if it's just washing a few dishes or cleaning your room...your dad may need the help with not having your mum around, the least you can do is turn off the PC for an hour and help him...things at home may be much more happier then....

Answer 9

Well why don't you suggest getting together as a family and going
out to together go shopping at the mall for Christmas. Like you and your dad go and get your sister something, while your sister
is shopping for you and your dad. Then your dad goes out and
shops for you and your sister. Now you have to go with your sisters boy-friend to go shopping for your dad and sister and besides this will give you time to get to know your sisters boy-
friend, you might think he is not boring after all. By the way your
your probably wondering about the money, well that's were dad
comes in, he knows your not old enough to work so you just
tell him your plans and hopefully it works and things go as planed.
Good Luck!! It Works here for my 9 year old I give her some
money if she ask and she will go buy me something for my B-Day or Christmas Presents. Were Parents we need to understand the under age childchildren in need.

Answer 10

Try to find something you can all do together. Pick a different activity for each week-end. Such as visit a new restaurant, go see a movie, go to a museum, have a picnic. Each family member gets to chose something different each week-end. Also, just try to be more involved - not lazy. Just get up and help without being asked or told. It may go a long way to make everyone a little more happy.