Advice Please...I feel so alone.?

Question

Me and my Ex broke up almost 3 weeks ago,because he tells me that he wants to be alone and he acts like he doesn't care for me. So I left him alone, and now since its close to thanksgiving I really feel alone, and I don't want to contact him cause he left me, and I don't feel that I should call him. I feel really sad because I did everything I could to make him happy and I don't understand why he can't call me even if its just to say hi. Do you think he will call or does this mean that he doesn't give a damn about me and never did care for me. Any good advise will be appreciated.

Answer 1

No matter what that sucks- I know how you feel- I have been there before. The thing is everyone has been there before and you need time to feel better. Not only were you emotionally attached to him, but you were physically attached to him because certain chemicals of attachment were involved and released when you were with him. Its like you are having withdrawal! So give it some time- everyday is hard but it gets easier- not always noticeably, but one day you will not think about him 24/7 only 23/7 (lol) and then the next even less and the next even less. If you go to him, he will not respond the way you want him to. Let him come to you and be gentle but ok- don't cry or let him know how you feel until he is ready to let you know how he feels- it is the best way to deal with these things and it is so hard to do. Everything will be ok and if he doesn't come back, that's because someone else is suppossed to be coming and you need to wait for him- that guy needed to leave your life so it could be open for the right man to come along. Just know you'll be ok- there are millions of people in the world and we have all been heart broken but have all survived and you will too. Its ok to feel lonely- its natural and everyone feels that way sometime or another. There are non-lonely times too those are ahead for you and if you are patient and know you can cope with these times, those times when you feel that people are all around you and that you are genuinely loved will seem better than you expected.

Answer 2

I think you are doing the right thing by leaving him alone. Maybe you should write him a letter to give yourself closure. Let him know how you feel about him, and tell him you are confused about why it ended. Don't make the letter sound desperate or sad. Just tell him your feelings and wish him luck in his life. If he doesn't want to be with you, nothing you can say will change his mind.

What you are feeling is normal, and it will take time to move on, but you will eventually. Always love yourself more than you love someone else! Just a rule I try to live by.

What good would it do if he called to say hi? It would give you false hope, and make you miss him even more. I don't know how long you were together, but try to be thankful for the time you had with him. People come and go out of our lives everyday. Sometimes it is really hard to see them go, but there is a reason for it. Good luck to you - try to have a good Thanksgiving!

Answer 3

It's always hard when someone walks away in the relationship. If it's you, it takes on entirely different feeling. You feel relieved and do not miss the person you left. That's how it is, I'm afraid. My Dad was a wonderful example of how a man ought to treat his woman.
He told us (5 girls):" If he (the boy) calls you, thank God!
If he doesn't, thank God!"
I have learned from that advice to move forward and let other people live with the decisions they make instead of trying to 'do' something that will change how it is now. Be strong. Don't call! Go over to friends and have a great Thanksgiving! Someone just for you is just around the corner.

Answer 4

I'm sorry that you're feeling so sad and lonely. It's especailly difficult around the holidays, but maybe you have some friends or family that you could spend Thanksgiving with. Sometimes it doesn't matter what we do to try to make the other person happy...they still leave. That doesn't mean that it was anything you did or didn't do...just that he did what he needed to do. I'm sure that he cared about you, and probably still does, but just isn't able to be in a relationship right now...who knows, maybe the Universe has something better in store for you!

Answer 5

It is natural to feel lonely, vulnerable and sad when you just break up. Since he said that he wants to be alone, it is best not to contact him in any way. That way, you prevent him taking you for granted. Be prepared not to get any kind of contact from him as you say that he acts like he doesn't care for you. If so, rethink the whole thing and see what you liked in him and if it is worth going around with him. If not, just move on. Sooner or later, I am sure you will find someone who can appreciate you better. And who knows, your ex might realize what he lost and wouldn't try to behave this way with any other person. Till then, I would suggest that you try and spend your holidays with family or friends - people who love you and care for you. The aim is to preoccupy yourself. In time, you will put him out of your mind and might even wonder what it was that you fell for in the first place.

Answer 6

I am sorry that you're feeling so lonely. I have been there myself. But now, You need to move past this guy and give yourself time to heal. Regardless of his "true" feelings for you, he has hurt you. Now your job is to take care of YOU. I know this is really hard but you have to try. Take it hour by hour if you have to but hold yourself together and move beyond the relationship. Go to a movie alone, read a book about Fishing, Cook your favorite meal, Call an old friend to catch up (no more that 3 min talking about the bum though). Get up. take a shower, put on your Make-Up for you. Not for for him but because you want to do it for yourself. I know it will not be easy if you're really hurting but you were alive before you met him and you will live long after you've forgotten his shoe size. It has to be all about you now. Don't jump into another relationship either, even if it's just physical. just give yourself some time to heal. Time to make plans of your own.

Answer 7

Kerry~ I think that if he says he wants to be alone then he means just that. You two were together & must have cared for ea other..or you would not have been 2gether...so give him that space. They say" Set it free & if its meant to be, it will find its way home" In the meantime: do things for yourself to make you feel good about you. Go get your hair, nails done. Get your eye brows waxed. Go shopping, exsercise, read, spend time w/ friends & family!! And if he doesnt come back to you...Then Oh Well...It's his fu(king loss!! You were probaly the best damn thang that happened to him!!!

Answer 8

He broke up with you for a reason, he's moved on, he might of like or cared for you in the past, doesn't mean that he cares for you now, it's really hard to deal with, but he won't call, you need to move on, like Timon said in the lion king, "You need to put the past behind ya" girl, you have a lot to offer someone, move on and find another man

Answer 9

hunny i was in the same predictament about 3 years ago when my bf of almost 4 yrs decided to break up with me and go out with my "best friend" and it was around thanksgiving too, i learned to love me and everything about me before i even thought about jumping into another relationship, so my advise to you is forget this guy...... take some you time learn about yourself go to a spa go to the libray be happy being with you, then try being happy with someone else.......
still dreaming in Idaho
Stacy

Answer 10

Your ex told you he wants to be alone - so let him be. It's especially hard around the holidays but it's better to leave him alone. Try to surround yourself with other people who care about you, friends, family and others. Take care of yourself first and try to be happy.