What can I do?
2006-11-22 02:26:55 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
He still is that very pleasant boy , it is still in there inside of him. For some reason some children go through a control stage. They try to control YOU instead of you controlling them.
Its up to you to choose your battles wisely and be consistant about the consequenses of his actions.
My daughter was always a grump. She became the sweetest child and I think that because she knew that that was the only way she can get along with everyone better!
Be patient. He will change..lots of hugs and kisses even when he doesnt win the battle!
2006-11-22 03:32:13 · answer #1 · answered by chiara 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Have there been any changes in his life (new baby or one on the way, move, new school, family issues that he is picking up on)? If there are, give him some extra love and support.
When he misbehaves, do not use time outs, spankings, or take away privileges. These are punishments, a way for you to control your son but not a way for him to learn self control. He, instead, needs to be disciplined.
The best way to discipline a child is to use natural or logical consequence. Taking away a toy or privileges when your son misbehaves is not a logical consequence. Taking away a toy if he throws it or is destructive with it is logical. Here are some more examples of natural and logical consequence: If he throws or is destructive with a toy, he puts it in the trash or you put it high up where he can see but not reach it. When he is ready to be gentle with it he can have it back. If he spills his milk, give him a towel to wipe it up. If he draws on the wall, give him a Magic Eraser to wipe it off and his markers or crayons get put away until he is ready to only use them on paper. Let the “punishment” fit the crime.
Another thing you can do when he misbehaves is to tell him “I don’t like when you (explain what and why in very few words).” Take him gently to a quiet area away from you (his room, the couch). Tell him “When you are ready to (stop, listen, be gentle, calm down…) then you can come back. This is not a time out because you are not giving him a time limit (you controlling him). He returns when he's ready to control himself. You may have to take him back to the spot several times before he gets the message. Thank him when he is calm. Keep it up!
Notice him when he is not misbehaving. Say things like "You worked on that for a long time! Look how high you can climb! You can run super fast! You used so many colors on that picture! You did that by yourself!" These are intrinsic motivators rather than extrinsic rewards ("Good job," stickers, candy). These phrases are great ways to show attention, great confidence builders, and will help him to feel powerful in a positive way.
Set limits, follow through, and offer choices, not chances. Pick you battles! You can say “Do you want to do that by yourself or do you want some help?” "No" should mean "No" the FIRST time you say it. Say "Yes" as much as possible. Be patient and consistent. Hope this helps! Good luck!
2006-11-22 14:03:24 · answer #2 · answered by marnonyahoo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a 3 y/o also and I find that they are just trying to find a little independance. Sometimes it's also trying to test their bounderies with you. If it's nothing serious, then I would suggest taking favorite toys/privledges away for a certain period of time. Explain to him why this is being done, so that he knows what he's done wrong and tell him how to get these things back by good behavior. Be consistant. Be firm, don't give in to screams and crying in this instance. I have figured out that when they are having a temper tantrum at home, I ignore it as best I can (if they aren't hurting themselves). And if behavior gets wayyyy out of line and he just WON'T listen for whatever reason.......a little swat on the bottom to restore a little order never hurts either.
2006-11-22 10:35:47 · answer #3 · answered by Crystal 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
would GREATLY help if you describe the behavior. I have a son who will turn 3 in a few days and I would be more than happy to share information but I need to know what behavior he is having. Anything new in his life like a babysitter, school, new babies in the family, new routine? If you edit your message I will be more than happy to respond.
2006-11-22 13:34:19 · answer #4 · answered by Summer H 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Continue to be the parent. His personality will change many times before he moves out.
2006-11-22 10:30:38 · answer #5 · answered by Phoenix, Wise Guru 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok this is what every parents should do, 1.lay down the law 2.tell him whos boss 3.teach him to respect his elders 4.teach him he cant always get what he wants all the time, no one does.
2006-11-22 19:05:02 · answer #6 · answered by mamas_grandmasboy06 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He'll probably grow out of it. These things just take time. On the other hand, he might turn out to be the next mass-murdering freak. They say it starts early...
2006-11-22 10:38:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
well something must be influencing him maybe its you or television or something but all you got to do is tap that *** get some of the action and show him who is boss
2006-11-22 10:35:30 · answer #8 · answered by tyree_dickerson 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
my daughter is the same way. i think it is a delayed terrable two thing, hopefully its just a phase that we can get through. good luck!
2006-11-22 11:50:24 · answer #9 · answered by thegoodwitchmm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hes getting to the point where he is trying to find ways of getting his own way. dont get angry or yell just yell him no and try to get him "hooked" onto another interest
2006-11-22 10:31:00 · answer #10 · answered by Betsy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋