Am I being stupid?

Question

I have a long distance relationship with my boyfriend since college. We broke up due to a number of reasons and decided to sort things out when he returns. Now, he's saying that he's fallen for a girl he met for just 3 weeks. I told him that it's okay. I still love him and will be here for him in case things don't work out with him and the girl.

I don't know if the girl seduced him, but if she did I'm surely the loser because I'm very conservative and don't want sex before marriage.

I'm very worried that the girl is just after his money and that she's a really bad girl.Though I shouldn't judge because I don't know her.

I'm open to suitors now but still open to my ex. Am I being stupid by doing that?

Answer 1

Not at all. Nothing wrong with leaving your options open. But I think you need to be realistic about the chances of getting back with him. It's fine for you to be open to it, but that doesn't mean that he is.

Answer 2

Not stupid, but you seem to be underestimating yourself a little bit by telling him you are willing to stand in line while he is enjoying his new relationship. You deserve better. You may still care about him as a friend, even love him, but makeing yourself so available just makes you look less valuable. It's like, noone appreciates water that comes out of the tap, although it's essential for our lives, but everybody loves expencive alcohol that isn't all that good for us.
Anyway...
Don't be too hard on yourself because you have strong morals either. Holding out until marriage may be right or wrong depending on what situation you find yourself in, but holding out for someone special is never wrong, nonetheless stupid.
And last but not least, you may still love your ex, but if you really don't know the girl, you really shouldn't judge her or her motives. If you want to tell your ex your concerns, do it without making it sound like you are just being jealous, show him that you do care about him and not about yourself being dumped.
You seem like a good girl and I'm sure a good guy (better than this one) will come along sooner or later.

Answer 3

If that is what you believe in and want to wait to get married, then you need to find someone who feels the same way. Long Distance relationships don't work out. I would let him go.

Answer 4

I am sooooo proud of your decision to save sex for marriage!! (I'm definitely with u on that one) I also think it's sweet that you are staying there for him in case anything goes wrong with his current relationship. Of course you're not being stupid by being open to your ex-relationships can hurtle in totally different directions. Besides, it's very likely that he won't be with this girl forever.

Answer 5

You should not take second place to anyone so move on and forget about him. Men are like busses there is another one around the corner

Answer 6

Read what you just wrote as you were listening to a friend, what would you tell her? You know the answer, move on.

Answer 7

I think he is not worth it for you to waste your time on him. I don't encourage pre-marital sex before marriage and also if he is keen on that gal who "eventually" seduced him,..... he is not the right guy for you.

Answer 8

u can email me [e-mail]

but he obvously needs time away from u to figure out if he wants to be with u

Answer 9

no u want to keep him around for a while

Answer 10

your smart in waiting for marriage: rock on!!!!
Id drop him chances are he will just cheat on you.