why cant we get a guy?

Question

well where do I start... myself and two of my best mates are kind of stumped, we cant seem to find guys to date. we arent your typical girlie girls but we are feminine. we have a lot of male friends and they dont understand why we are all single either. we like to go out and have a laugh and are quite intimidating I guess as we are quite bubbly and have the attitude "we dont give a crap like me as I am or not at all" we get on with every one and not to be vain but we arent ugly. all of out male friends say we would be the perfect girlfriends as we go out have a laff, we arent possesive over men. we arent klingy women. what are we doing wrong someone please enlighten me

ok I have taken on board what you have all said, we arent manly women when we go out we do dress girly. and do aproach men and have a laugh. so are we being scrutinised against for liking sport and having male friends, ok I think your right when you say we are intimidating when we are all together but thats what girls do isnt it go out in groups of girls?

thanks guys I think I have my answer, be less intimidating and more approachable? and try to socialise in smaller groups? and be a bit more girly. (ok slowly Im having to change my personality and I dont know if Im liking it much)

Answer 1

Well, are you interested in any of these guys? I usually find that women who can't find a guy are too picky because they are looking for a perfect person who only exists in movies.

Answer 2

When you go out, do you spend the whole time hanging around each other? Are you ever alone? Guys don't like approaching groups of women when they are interested in talking to just one of you.

Next time you go out, try seperating yourself from the group for a little while. And not just to walk yourself to the bathroom. If you go clubbing, stand to the side and start moving to the rhythm of the music while watching everyone on the dance floor.

Guys are intimidated enough approaching just one girl, imagine how they must feel going into a group of women. Rejection in front of one person is bad enough, but to have her friends laughing too is more than some people are willing to put themselves through.

Give it time. Maybe you're just going to the wrong places...

Answer 3

I am a guy. It sounds as if you are confident and self esteem is pretty high. You are probably a strong presence especially with the two other friends (female). You are probably intimidating to some men. Maybe? Just a shot in the dark. Alot of times I am just too insecure to approach women. Especially if I am very attracted to them. I pick the ones with the low self esteem or poor body image. Rejection then is not so much of an issue.

Answer 4

The reason you don't have bf's is because you don't really want any ... you are obviously too busy enjoying yourself ... and good for you !!!

no girl has a lot of male friends .. and is single ... unless she is turning down a lot of offers ... or sadly .. not very attractive.

But ... don't come on here pretending that you are having a hard time of it.... youre not ..... some of us are not that stupid...

If boys are saying you would make perfect girlfriends ... to say you cant get a guy is a contradiction...

just enjoy yourself ... doing whatever you're doing ...

... and stop wasting your time asking questions like this

Dr BAd
Not suffering fools today
(has REAL man syndrome)

Answer 5

Public perception! I can say that you and your friends may be "confident" in yourselves, but it can come off as "condensending" or "pompous". It is more than alright to have an opinion where we are not so interested in what others think about us, but when we are looking for others to take an interest in us, how we portray ourselves and the image of "like it or not, take it or not" sends out a message that is contrary to what your goal is. It you were not looking, then it wouldnt matter what others think of you, but since you are out on the "market", you cant have the attitutde of this type as it wont get you interest from the other sex. Look at it like sales..

You are wanting to sell something that appears to be of a concern or may have problems to a buyer that doesnt want problems later on down the line.. Its not gonna happen.

I applaud you for having good self confidence, but you cant win over anyone, especially guys, when you come off like this. Keep that type of attitude to yourself and your friends, and make sure it doesnt eminate when you are out in public. Your "guy" friends have had the chance to get to know you, so they may understand a different side that is more appealing, but unless you and your friends are gonna start dating them, the attitude is going to play against you.

That type of attitude is a "red flag" to other guys, especially ones that dont know you from the next person. Guys want women that are approachable, and that wont burn them for just trying. This image you have set, appears that you will burn them if they even try.

Answer 6

I am amazed... gob smacked and totally baffeld at what i am reading!!!! Where do u girls go out??? I mean....u say u girls aint ugly.... ur bubbely... & up 4 a laugh... the only answer to this sollution is COME TO ME!!!!... I am 100% certain i wouldnt be intimidated by some cute, friendly, up for a gud laugh group ov girls!!!

So, slap sum lip gloss on, hipster jeans etc etc and lets get this party started girls!!!!

Answer 7

Shake things up a little. Take your show on the road. Go to some new places, try some new things.

There are places you can go be the only women among alot of guys. Take up scuba diving, sailing, glass blowing. All those kind of things are male dominated.

Answer 8

Could be that it is intimading if all of you hang in a group. As a guy its easier to appraoch a woman who has 1 friend. A group of rowdy ladettes (No offence, but you sound it), would probably not get approached unless it was a group of guys.

You see alot of guys hunt like predators, they look for a prey that looks unthreatening. Its bad getting shot down...But its worse infront of a group.

Answer 9

If I'll be frank with you cos I'm a guy, I think it's either you're giving the guys a signal that you're ether desperados or frustrated spinsters or both. Think about this as you do some "stock taking" of your past interactions with those guys you've met in the past and let me have your response as you contact me through my profile for further discussions. cya.

Answer 10

if your hanging about with male friends thats your problem there. men don't like being friends with girls and never can be. any prospect of a date seeing you with boys will think you already are in a relationship. dump your male friends and go out with females only, you'll be beating the fellas of you with a fly swat.