Is it so wrong for a women not to want to get married?

Question

I have been close to getting married a few times. Everytime I get too close I get scared to death and can't go through with it. I am in a relationship now and love him to death. I thought I wanted to get married until we went to pick out rings, now have that scared to death feeling again. I don't understand what is the big deal about getting married. We can stay together as long as we want anyway, so I don't really see the point. When I tell people I don't have any real interest in getting married, they look at me like I'm a alien or something. I know its because I'm a women and we're suppose to be the ones to want it most, but I've never been into ideals or traditions. I'm not religous and don't have any family pressure about it, so it doesn't mean to me what it means to alot of people. I don't have any real value associated with it. I'm well taken care of by myself so the security thing is not an issue for me. Am I really that strange? I don't see the big deal.

Answer 1

No, this is just what society expects of all women to get married and have children. So if you are not ready then don't do it, and stop being so concerned with what others think of your choices. They are not taking care of you, so who cares what they think. God bless****

Answer 2

No, of course not. If all women married and had kids the world would be overly the top populated. But you love the people you have been with. You were going or am getting married and scared. Heck anyone would be scared. The people seening you as an alien are still living in the old age. Women are not suppose to be anything but themselves, even in the 1st to the last. Your not strange. Because commiting yourselve to one person is not only scary but weird.

Answer 3

I was one of those who couldn't wait to get married. Now that I am divorced, things are different. Marriage is alot of work. And it is different than just living together-you have much more at stake. Not to scare you. Marriage can be wonderful too...with the right person. Better for you to be sure that it is what you BOTH want. Personally, now I would be just content (and happy) to have someone wonderful in my life and not deal with all the "marriage" stuff. Unless your planning for children, take your time. You, my dear, are not strange...you are probably more sane and normal than most. Good Luck. If the time is ever right...you'll know.

Answer 4

Honestly, I don't know many women that don't want to get married. But, you know what? Who cares about what others think. You have to do what is right for you. If you are happy in your relationship without a marriage certificate, so be it. Hopefully your partner is happy without it as well. If that's the case, then ignore everybody and anybody that says you should follow the norm...just be yourself. If on the other hand, you aren't entirely happy with this situation, maybe you should consider going to counselling? Have you spoken about your feelings with your partner? Let him know how you feel so that he isn't blindsided on the day of the wedding if you turn into the runaway bride. Best of luck.

Answer 5

If you get that felling don't do it. That is your intuition telling you not to marry. Marriage is a long time commitment and these people that always wanting to get married need to stop and look at the bad with the good. I really hate to hear someone ", Oh why want he marry me". You don't marry someone just to get pregnant have a bunch of kids and then DIVORCE no child support a struggle. I for one are really proud of you., Keep your head on her shoulders.just like you are , now.

Answer 6

marriage is a meaningful symbolic gesture for some, and is a legal/paper-work thing for others..

it's ok not to want to get married, but the question you need to ask yourself is: why don't i want to get married.

the fact that you get "scared to death" is a sign that this is much more than an issue of not wanting to get married for either symbolic, religious, or legal reasons.. sounds like you may have a fear of commitment..

i don't think you are "Strange" as you say, but it's probably best to seek help so you can understand specifically why it is that you are fearful of marriage or the idea of marriage.. that is, if it is bothering you this much.

Answer 7

Hey, as long you already agreed with your spouse on the nature of the relationship between the two of you, you already married. That's actually what marriage is for thousand of years, only the definition has been perverted for the last few hundred of years.

Now, to kept your relationship not feeling ackward and feel like a marriage, maybe you should refer your spouse as 'your man' and you as 'his woman'. You might also should refer your relationship as a 'commitment'.

Answer 8

No, of course it's not wrong if you don't want to get married. Marriage is a choice not a requirement. What is wrong however is leading a guy on and pretending you want to get married when deep down you don't.

You should make your feelings clear to whomever you're seeing and maybe find someone who shares similar feelings towards marriage. That way no one gets hurt

Answer 9

If you don't want to get married, then don't. If people don't like it then "Tuff"! You do what you feel comfortable doing and if that is staying single, then so be it.

Answer 10

...... these are modern time's, so your'e completely entitled to choose what you prefer..... How-ever, dont miss out, what ever you do,... on having son's and daughter's, because this young babies of your's will go on to become, electrical engineer's, mechanical engineer's, and computer engineer's, to carry on your parent's and your own family name, and their attainment's will reflect on you, both as a person, and a mother!... ( and/or wife,. depending on what you decide.)...