I live in Florida first of all. I have a 3 wk old baby. I was seeing her father about 3-4 months before I got pregnant. When we met I explained to him that I didn't think I could ever give him children as I was told by specialists that I could not have anymore children. I tried for years with my xhusband and it never happend. So I got pregnant and my boyfriend slowly withdrew from me. He suggested abortion and got really nasty a few times, even wishing me and his child dead. To make a long story short I went through the entire pregnancy alone, drove myself to the hospital and went through over 40 hrs of labor alone! Once she was born I texted his cousin that his child was here, the room# and hospital so he could come see her if he wanted. But of course he never showed up so my baby has my last name, I didn't even put her fathers name on any paperwork at all. Then about 2 wks later he he leaves a voicemail on my cell, "i'm coming to see the baby"... finally he shows up 4 days later.
2006-11-21 12:55:01 · 14 answers · asked by ? 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
(con't).. he struts into my house, picks the baby up out of her crib, holds her about 5 mins then leaves. He had the nerve to say he was taking her with him! Then he has seen her one other time for about 30 mins. He hasn't bought one thing for her! NOTHING. I never push him away or anything, I want him in her life but I don't trust him enough to run off with her. He wants her every other weekend, and I say NO! So today he threatened to take me to court. I doubt he has the money but still, does this man have any rights? He wished she would die before she was born, there is no legal documentation that she belongs to him, and he does nothing for her!
2006-11-21 12:58:21 · update #1
Well out of spite, I would say no he has no right, but he does have the right to see her on your terms, since he is not providing for her, and because of your fear. Demand his financial support of the child because it is a right. And if he wants to take you to court tell him to go ahead, because he will be forced to pay child support. If he is really concerned for his child he will begin supporting the child. Well for the fear you have, it is very understandable, you are the only parent for the baby at the moment and you must protect your child as best as you can. Maybe court isn't so bad to do since it will give you the right to voice out your fear and concerns and there will be a paper and legal representation for you and your child.
2006-11-21 13:33:16 · answer #1 · answered by leoncito123451 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he does take you to court they will order a DNA test and know its his. Then he will be entitled to rights with a payment of child support each month. He wont be able to take the baby overnight until shes a year old especially if youre breastfeeding (and it's not to late to start) but he is entitled to time a few hours here ad then. Sorry for the bad news but it is what it is. I am divorced too and he has always done and did the same thing. My daughter is four now and he still hasnt lost his rights and he hasnt seen her in two months, so honestly dont excpect his rights to ever be taken away no matter what he does. If you go to court a mediator can help you decide what visitation time is best and if you to cant see eye to eye then you must follow this schedule. Sorry but honestly it is better to cooperate. It helps you later
2006-11-21 13:04:42 · answer #2 · answered by do you know me? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all I want to tell you to stay strong since you are a single mother and I will keep you in my prayers.
Now, as far as him trying to take legal custody of her, the courts will not take a child from the mother unless the mother is totally unfit and on some form of drugs. I would not worry about it. Just pray. I understand how you feel about the baby going with him. Just tell him that the baby is too young right now. Good luck. I will pray for you daily. As the father he does have rights. Now he must realize that if he takes you to court then they will ask you if you want to file child support. Now if you file child support then they will give him restricted visitation rights and he will not be able to take the baby far away.
Hope I was able to help. good luck
2006-11-21 13:06:50 · answer #3 · answered by Ms. Johnson 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it is his baby and he wants to see it he will have to go through the courts to demand visitation. They will order a DNA test and if he is the father he will be granted rights to see the baby. You will most likely have to have a mediator to come to some sort of a visitation agreement.
Also keep in mind that if he does it through the courts they will also assign him to pay child support.
If he wants to see his baby and you can be two mature adults regarding the situation you should let him.
My ex-fiancee and I went through a similar situation with his ex who gave birth to his baby. She was horrible to him and me regarding the situation (jealously and resentment) and it made the child's life difficult at times.
You shouldn't forbid the baby contact with her father if it is offered. Just make sure that he understands that seeing the baby also results in him supporting her too.
Keep in mind that the vicious statements that he made when you were pregnant were most likely out of fear. Fear of becoming a father before he was ready, etc. People often say things that they don't mean when they are in a scary situation.
2006-11-21 13:03:40 · answer #4 · answered by msnite1969 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well im not an expert and i dont know what your laws are but unless he wants a paternity test to prove to the court that he is her father - i dont see how he has any legal rights. after all his name isnt on the birth certificate. by the way i feel for you. you are a strong woman and sound like a great mom. try not to let him bring you down. also - maybe talk to a lawyer. personally i would take the child and move away where he wouldnt know where i was. legally you have the right.
2006-11-21 13:20:16 · answer #5 · answered by kd baby 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Legally, UNTIL a paternity test is done, he has NO rights...that is legally. Because you wern't married, a paternity test MUST be done for him to have any legality toward the child. Even if you listed him on the birth cert, he still legally has no rights.
I'd be done with him. Let him "escape" per say, and then when you do meet a man who will be your baby's father, it makes it a lot easier for your new man to adopt her. A small blurb goes out in the paper, then viola!!! He can adopt. Let the loser go, he will kick himself later.
2006-11-21 13:21:47 · answer #6 · answered by 3rdtimesacharm 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is the baby's father. Although he may be the most perfect a-- of the whole world - he is still her father and will always be her father no matter what. The reality is that you chose to be with him in the first place.
He has rights no matter how badly he hurt you or treated you - short of abusing the child. It sucks but it's reality.
If you want to protect yourself and your child then I would suggest getting a lawyer.
2006-11-21 13:01:44 · answer #7 · answered by MissHazel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. As a biological father, he has the same rights compared to you.
The mother is custody of the child up to a certain age. And when the child reaches that age, the parents can legally talk about who's custody the child will be.
The ruling differs from state to state.
So i suggest you inquire your problem to a social worker. They may be able to answer your questions properly.
2006-11-21 13:18:15 · answer #8 · answered by Rey Arson II 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What an asshole. It takes two to make the baby and a mother to be should never have to go through the pregnancy by herself.
I have respect for you for going through such a tough time like this. Good luck with the baby.
2006-11-21 13:38:04 · answer #9 · answered by Lori M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Correct
2016-05-22 11:19:36 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋