Q: At lunch, what did Obi-Wan say to Luke?
A: "Use the forks, Luke."
Q: Did you hear the one about the two kids who tried to kiss in the fog?
A: They mist!
Q: Did you know there are three types of people?
A: Those who can count, and those who can't!
Q: How did Darth Vader know what Luke was getting for Christmas?
A: He felt his presents!
Q: How did the lumberjack use the computer?
A: He logged on!
Q: How do mad scientists freshen their breath?
A: With experi-mints!
Q: How do wealthy people dance?
A: Check-to-check!
Q: How do short people like to travel?
A: In mini-vans!
Q: How do you find King Arthur in the dark?
A: With a knight light.
Q: How does the barber cut the Moon's hair?
A: E-clipse it!
Q: How does the barber do his work so fast?
A: With short cuts!
Q: How is an engaged woman like a telephone?
A: They both have rings!
Q: What did the cop say to the bad popsicle?
A: Freeze!
Q: Did you ever see the movie "Constipated?"
A: It never came out!
Q: Can you use green, pink, and yellow in a sentence?
A: When the phone goes green green, I pink it up, and say yellow!
Q: Did you take a bath this morning?
A: No. Is there one missing?
Q: How do you get an alien baby to sleep?
A: You rock-et!
Q: How do you fix a car in Scotland?
A: With Scotch tape!
Q: How do you get rid of a boomerang?
A: Throw it down a one way street!
Q: What did one elevator say to the other?
A: "I think I'm coming down with something!"
Q: What did one hammer say to the other hammer?
A: "I broke a nail!"
Q: What did one penny say to the other penny?
A: We make perfect cents!
Q: What did Snow White say while she waited for her photos?
A: "Some day my prints will come!"
Q: What did the alien say to the gas pump?
A: "Get your finger out of your ear when I'm talking to you!"
Q: Why were the middle ages so dark?
A: Because there were a lot of knights!
Q: What's black and white and red all over?
A: A zebra with chicken pox!
Q: "Doctor, doctor I feel like some curtains."
A: "Then pull yourself together!"
Q: How did the boy get Egyptian flu?
A: He caught it from his mummy!
Q: How does the Eskimo mend his house?
A: With iglue!
Q: What can you catch, but not throw?
A: Your breath!
Q: What did one eye say to the other?
A: Between you and me... something smells!
Q: "Waiter, this soup tastes funny!"
A: "Then why aren't you laughing?"
~~Thank you for reading all of my jokes. More will soon
2006-11-21 10:19:42 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
a round of applause and a big pat on the back from me.....
2006-11-21 10:30:03 · answer #1 · answered by chris w. 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok I have been given one!! Farmer Jones's cows those days stopped giving stable milk. So Farmer Jones asked different farmers for suggestion. while somebody advised him that happy cows supply stable milk, Farmer Jones began telling jokes to cows each moring. they could all snicker. The neighboring cows thought the jokes have been surprisingly stupid. through this, Farmer Jones's cows grew to become the guffawing inventory of city. I additionally I certainly have this one.... A van crammed with politicians substitute into heading down a rustic highway while, without notice, the van careened off the line and crashed right into a tree close to a farmer's container. A farmer out plowing his container observed what occurred. After investigating he proceeded to bury each and all of the flesh presser. some days later the community sheriff got here out, observed what substitute into left of the van, and aked the farmer the place each and all of the politicians had long gone. "I buried them." "have been all of them died?" "nicely, some pronounced they weren't," the farmer admitted, "yet you be attentive to how them politicians lie." Yeah it extremely is no longer a pair of farmer specifical even if it has one in it!! anyhow it extremely is all I have been given!! :-)
2016-11-25 23:36:09 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice and short, didn't make me lol (sorry) but They made a nice change to reading the long drawn-out ones.
2006-11-21 10:27:19 · answer #3 · answered by mistickle17 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you perhaps work in a factory, writing the jokes that go inside christmas crackers???
or did you used to write the jokes on ice-lolly sticks?
2006-11-21 11:08:55 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should have taken a vote to see which one is voted best,me the eyes have it.
2006-11-21 10:31:48 · answer #5 · answered by kman1830 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How DO you keep them so fresh? Love 'em all.
2006-11-21 14:14:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Knock knock.Who's there.Ipe.Ipe who.So that's what the smell is.
2006-11-21 10:27:14 · answer #7 · answered by Monkey Basement 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
LMAO too cute good job!
2006-11-21 10:31:56 · answer #8 · answered by smartypantsleen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
they're great, a bit corny but still great.
2006-11-21 10:35:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you made me smile
2006-11-21 10:26:02 · answer #10 · answered by TINYTI 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋