Why do people get mad at me when I tell them i do not like children?

Question

And I do not want to hold, play with or generally want to be around their kids?

Answer 1

I'm with you on that one! I don't want to hold or play with children either but my friends INSIST on bringing them to lunch with us, or out for dinner when they know we'll be drinking. I just think there's a time and place for it. I didn't want to invite kids to my wedding (and didn't) because I felt it wasn't a place for kids when we're all going to be drinking like fish. I still have yet to hear the end of that one from his family....

Answer 2

As mom myself, I have to say more then not they want you to see kids as they do. Not all kids are obnoxious little brats. Some of them are sweet well behaved little people. Next time you don't want to play or hold someones little one just decline politely "Sorry, but I'm very uncomfortable aroud children". As oposed to "Well, I just don't like children." Theres a good chance they'll understand. But, something that a lot of people not wanting children should understand is to a lot of parents their kids are their life. They got to see this wonderful little person (that may one day be an adult just like you) from the moment they were born. It's hard to love someone so much and then hear someone else doesn't even want to touch them let alone be around them. Just ask that friends with kids be sensitive to your feelings and try to be sensitive to theirs.

Answer 3

If you don't like kids, politely and diplomatically say you're at a point in your life where you don't think about it... remember if they are the parents, the child or children has now become a very endearing part of their lives...so it's their darling babies that you will be referring to.. so be nice... :) I can understand why people don't want to hold newborns as they are very delicate and fragile.. and a person may come to love and attached to them and want them... God forbid this from happening to a single person living the great singles life.

Answer 4

I don't know, but it happens to me, too. I've always been open about my childfree status. Don't want kids, and I'm not interested in them. Some people can't handle that. Often, I've noticed that the people who can't handle it are usually parents who popped out their pups far too young, and are defensive. They know they made a questionable lifetime decision, but just don't want to admit it out loud. Others are child worshipers...they feel that kids are all innocent, precious little angels (ha). They labor under the delusion that everybody wants a houseful of children, and they couldn't be more wrong.

Answer 5

I do not care at all what your feelings on children are. Some people like kids and some don't. Fine. What I don't care for is those people who don't like kids but can't seem to talk about anything else. They make it their life's passion to criticize every little thing about children and people who have them. This makes me think it isn't about them not liking children, there is some underlying issue there. I know a woman who says she hates kids. But it is all she talks about. She spends her days going on and on about how dirty they are, how annoying they are, how loud they are. And this is when children aren't even around! It is as if she has no other focus in her life. I have no idea what is going on with her but I think she has some serious issues. She also likes to criticize people who have kids. I don't care if you don't like kids but don't get in my face telling me how I'm a terrible person for having kids. This girl told me I gave up my individuality to have children. Okay...whatever. She obviously knows very little about being a parent. And for some reason her life is so miserable she has nothing better to do than dwell on how terrible children and their parents are.

Answer 6

Hm. Perhaps they object to the fact you just go through the motions without an end result. Too, these children might be the type most people wouldn't like and you are likely making this more pointedly obvious than most.

Answer 7

Because to most people, children are the most precious things in their lives. It's their little baby and they want everyone to coo over it... and you not wanting to is an affront to that. Because the child is so special to them, they perceive it as a direct insult to themselves. It doesn't matter if you're like that with all children, it doesn't matter if you're ultra-polite with your avoidance of contact with the little monsters: if you don't like their child, you don't like them.

I get that all the time... they say 'oh, you'll change your mind when you have your own.' Er... thanks. Because that's likely. Still, for now, keep your snotty-nosed little wretch away from me. I value my eardrums.

Answer 8

I get the same, people can't understand why I wouldn't want kids, or to be around kids.

Answer 9

They get mad because they assume that you don't like THEIR children. Then they think that if you don't like their children, then you don't like THEM - or are passing judgement on how their children were raised, etc. People often take offense where none is meant.

Answer 10

i guess it is just hard to understand! people can not relate to it. most people love kids, it gives them a reason to fall in love, get married, and have children. you figure most people dream about this their whole life.it gives them a reason for living. when someone comes along and does not follow the norm, they do not know how to react.