I just started college, and I haven't really bonded wiith any particular group of friends yet. I am always alone, and living in the dormitories can be quite depressing with no friends to keep you company. I've tried joining clubs, talking more, smiling and communicating, but that clearly doen't work! Everytime I meet someone, they either make it awkward for me, or lose interest in me after about a week. What should be done. I want my four years of college to be fun and worth while. Even though I am a quiet person, I still yearn for the fun and exitement that comes with being in college. Right now, Im really sad and I need some serious advice!
2006-11-21 08:20:54 · 8 answers · asked by 09 _ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
a big community at college is called facebook.com, make a profile and add some pics and then start adding friends who are in your classes, you will soon build up a lot of friends who you can ask for help in your courses, once you break the ice, hopefully they will invite you to other party's and social gatherings
2006-11-21 08:25:58 · answer #1 · answered by Druid2020 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can guarantee you that there is at least one other person at that college who feels exactly as you do. When you find him or her, you will have a friend. Since you just started college, it is too early to give up hope. Also, are you sure you are at the right college with like-minded people? I will tell you my story -- I went to a large university my freshman year and I felt just as you did. The girls in the dorm were only interested in dating and getting into a sorority. I was a shy bookworm and didn't fit in. I transferred the next year to a small liberal arts college, and I found a good friend the first week I was there. Then both of us made more friends but always had each other to rely on. The other students at that college were interested in their studies and not into partying all the time. Bookworms were not out of place.
So I would suggest that you 1. think about whether or not you are at the right college 2. look around for that other shy person who seems to be alone and ask him/her a question to open up a conversation 3. keep smiling and being nice to others but don't push yourself on them so that they back away 4. do volunteer work off campus -- your good friend might not even be in college. She/he might be a "townie".
I hope this helps. Don't give up. But also don't have unrealistic expectations about college life -- during your freshman year, everyone is just trying to find his or her niche, just as you are doing.
2006-11-21 16:38:59 · answer #2 · answered by Anniesgran 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You poor pet. Lots of people end up in the same situation as you when they start college, so don't think you're alone in feeling like this. Honestly, I find the best way to make friends is to approach people and ask them all about themselves. People love talking about themselves, believe me! Then when they mention a hobby or interest, say you've the same interest or that you'd like to try it out. Then ask for their number within the context of getting involved in this activity together and call him/her the next day about it. Or after chatting for a while ask if they want to go for coffee, there and then, and you can chat some more.
It sounds to me like you have confidence issues, and you're probably afraid of imposing on someone else's time. But the truth is they probably think you're great company and love being around you, and if you keep telling yourself that then you'll keep becoming better company and more fun to be around. If you're awkward and shy then they probably won't want to hang out with you.
You say people lose interest in you after about a week, well don't let them. If you haven't heard from them in a while don't be afraid to call them, ask them to go for coffee, ask them up to your dormitory for a chat. This all boils down to you being confident and believing that these people want you as a friend as much as you want them as friends. Good luck Xx
2006-11-21 16:34:07 · answer #3 · answered by Ally 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do thinks like ask ppl if they want to go to the movie with you. Find out the interest of the group of ppl and get involved in that. Friends will come.
There might be a person with no enemy but there is no one with no friend
2006-11-21 16:27:11 · answer #4 · answered by Mr Business 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you must relax, maybe you're trying with the wrong people, or trying too hard, you've only just started.
Don't stick to ideas of how you want things to be and enjoy everyday life as it is, don't rely so much on people, relax
2006-11-21 16:26:50 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit with someone who u want to b friends with at lunch and if u both have the same food ask what foods they might like
2006-11-21 16:24:49 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The bible says... To have friends, show yourself friendly. Somethng like that!
2006-11-21 16:24:41 · answer #7 · answered by Child of God 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop talking to us and go outside!!!!!
2006-11-21 16:23:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋