I am extremely Introverted and my girlfriends is extremely extroverted. She gets angry that I don't talk to people and that I keep to myself. She threatens to dump me if I don't become a little more outgoing. I love her and I don't know what to do. I don't want to lose her over my social skills how do I fix this problem?
2006-11-21 07:12:31 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
common problem!!! my boyfriend and i are the same way. it use to really bother me, but i realized that we arent the same, and im okay with it! some people will use being an introvert as an excuse to be rude. she doesnt want you to go out and be a social butterfly, just make sure that you arent rude to people. introduce youself to new people whenever they come around you. she was attracted to you while you were being "introverted" so ask her why should you have to change. tell her that you will make an effort to say hello to her frineds or whatever when they come around, but you arent liuke her and arent going to run around introducing yourself to everyone, and if she doesnt like it or that isnt enough, then she is trying to change you, and you dont need that anyway. you got her being yourself, and you'll get another one just the same! stand your ground, because if you change this she will want you to change other things as well. she has to learn to accept you for you!
2006-11-21 07:20:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it is going to involve some discomfort. You are going to need to learn social skills until you become proficient. You may never be the life of a party, but you should at least be able to attend social events with your SO without feeling completely awkward. This means you must consciously do something you do not like or are uncomfortable with in order to become proficient. So, ask yourself, is she worth it? If so, suck it up and start on a little self improvement. I recommend you try to find a group or club that shares a common interest with you (stamp collecting, karate, whatever) and hang out with them for starters. Women have a way of making things up to guys who go the extra mile, if that is any consolation.
2006-11-21 07:18:21 · answer #2 · answered by DJL2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The degree of introversion/extroversion is determined at birth, according to studies. It does take supreme effort to overcome introversion, but can be improved upon. How about joining a service organization such as Toastmasters, where you have to get up and speak publicly? It really helped my dad a lot. Or take a speech class at a local college......
2006-11-21 07:16:13 · answer #3 · answered by finaldx 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What about you will she "fix" after she changes your introversion? Is she trying to make you into a clone of herself? Why doesn't she love you just the way you are? Better idea...convince her to become introverted since being an extrovert is a huge pain. She's in everyone's face all the time, "look at me, look at me"!
Just another way to look at this, Dude.
2006-11-21 07:16:00 · answer #4 · answered by Monica M 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First of all, she is completely in the wrong. If she is dating someone introverted, she needs to respect that. If she threatens to dump you if you do not become more outgoing, she doesn't care enough about YOU! I am going to forget her and just address your problem.
If you want to become more sociable, try to plan topics to talk about when you're with people. Ask them questions about themselves and their interests. People LOVE to talk about themselves. Once you're more comfortable with these people, you will open up. Good luck to you. I'm still mad at her.
2006-11-21 07:21:16 · answer #5 · answered by butrcupps 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well first of all she should accept you for who you are. I mean isn't that why she's with you? Because she likes who you are?
I'm the same way. Small talk does not come easy to me, in fact I hate it. My idea of a great night is sitting at home reading a book. I don't chat with the grocery store clerks, my nail lady, etc. I also don't have this gaggle of friends. I have a few friends and that's all I need.
2006-11-21 07:19:20 · answer #6 · answered by Elisabeth R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
look at Wikipedia & Google; they could prefer to have short descriptions; quite, Freud grew to grow to be into into the psychosexual area of matters, going from early chlidhood, yet Jung below tension the collective subconscious and Gestalt. the two had factors that are in spite of the certainty that suited in the present, yet in basic terms to a limited degree. that would prefer to grant you a concept of the region to start, yet others could have tried this, so flow your person way from there and attempt to be unique, or a minimum of use your person words; do no longer plagiarise!
2016-10-17 08:26:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are who you are! Don't let her threaten to dump you if she gets angry for you doing you. Turn the tables on her and leave her a**. Find someone who is more like you.
2006-11-21 07:14:31 · answer #8 · answered by Luv My Corgi 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
just start it slowly. for a week each day talk to one different person a day. the next week talk to two and the next three and so on. before you'll know it you'll have a lot of aquaintances some of which could become your friends.
2006-11-21 07:17:54 · answer #9 · answered by maria92588 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont change who you are, not for anyone. she was attracted to you for some reason and now she wants to change you. I tend to be more on the introverted side and im ok.
2006-11-21 07:49:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋