He is going on 3 and still wants the nappy at home, school he uses the toilet?

Question

He goes to the toilet at school but refuses to go at home or when we are out. He will hold it until i put a nappy on. I tell him that he is a big boy now, his response is "no i not a big boy, i am a baby" I am a single mom with no other children. He gets all my love and attention. When people are around he sometimes talks like a small baby when he can talk properly, what should i do?

I have tried all kinds of charts, sweets, toys, trucks, TV.

Answer 1

Honey, my son is the exact same way. He'll be 3 this month. He'll use the toilet about half the time. I think my son is just plain stubborn. LOL Probably with your son, he's okay being the big boy at school because of his peers, but don't worry, he'll soon want to be the big boy at home too. Just remember, somewhere out there, there's another mother struggling with the same thing. You are not alone.

Answer 2

He likes to be your special baby, so you really need to change your tac-ticks!!

I work in a nursery and the whole, wow your a big boy now, thing usually works very well. Especially when they get there big boy pants that they don't want to mess up.

Have you tried the reward system? A sticker chart for every wee on the potty or toilet perhaps 2 for a poo. Every time they go on the toilet or potty you basically have to act like you've just won the lottery! Really celebrate their achievement and make them feel really clever and important. Get them to phone an aunt or gran or one of your friends if they've had a really good day, so that they can praise them also.

The star chart can work well as a reward system, like once you have 10 stars you can have a new toy. Or if you have no accidents all week you can have a new toy.

Also make sure they have the opportunity. When at home, let them walk around bottom half naked, or just in pants. have a potty in the room he is in. and make him sit down on it every 20 minutes.

Never use pull-ups!!!! The child doesn't know the difference between a pull up and a nappy. You just have to be prepared to clean up after them!

Answer 3

LMAO obviously some people who have answered you havent got kids!!

for a start dont worry about it all kids develop at differnt ages. Make sure you reward him when there is any interest shown in the potty or toilet. DO NOT make a thing out of it if there isnt. If you are getting wound up by it they can tell and whether the attention is good or bad it is still attention and encourage them to do it more. All kids want to be cuddled and "babied" at times there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Your child knows that potty is associated with "big boy" but try not bothering so much with that and concentrate on mentioning it with other things - eg if he brings you his shoes AFTERWARDS say " Thank you what a clever big boy you are bringing your shoes" and mybe reward with a small treat at first (doesnt have to be chocolate) maybe let him choose what the family has for tea or where you go for an hour at weekend as "big boys can make those decisions" when he realises that big boys have fun ( but still loads of love cuddles and attention) he will begin to want to do other " big boy " things. I would be quite firm though about nappies not being worn in the house. Leave him with nothing on ( all accidents can be cleaned up) if this causes upset distract from it with fave toys/games/films/activities etc and make sure you keep a potty in every room . If he doesnt use it just say oh dear you had an accident wee wee's should go in the potty but do not make a big fuss etc out of it or cleaning up the mess. If he does use the potty which he eventually will go absolutely barmy telling him how clever and big he is. and always make sure that any praise involves loads of cuddles and kisses as this is what children think they will miss out on by growing up. Good luck

Answer 4

hi I have three children but not this problem, but my sister-in-law did My nephew is now 7 and not in nappies. He is only three and too me its his way of being mummys baby please be impressed that he is out of nappies at three. Also try not to make an issue of it you will be surprised at the results. I hope that is of some help Keep me posted have just read some of the answers too your question and am completeley shocked it is nothing to do with you being a single parent or not being firm enough its just that he is comfortable being a baby with his mum. Keep your chin up and you do what is best for you and your little one. The talking is no worry honestly. When he starts school he will be the biggest boy in the class I promise you! take care

Answer 5

Apparently he doesnt feel as if he gets all your attention. Because that is why he is doing the things you say he is, its for attention. And just so you know a person can not "hold it" forever stop putting a diaper on him and either he'll piss down his leg and hate the feeling or actually go to the bathroom. You are the parent and if you are letting a 3 year old run the show whats going to happen when he's 10, 16 or even 18

Answer 6

my son was exactly the same and it drove me crazy!!! i also got the 'i'm a baby' bit.
star charts over the loo are fantastic as the child has a visual reminder of how well they are doing. my son was dry but wasn't clean and would put the nappy on himself and i tore my hair out - til i ran out of nappies and he had no choice in the matter! he hopped about, screamed and cried but then went on the loo and we haven't looked back since!
ignore the speech thing - any reaction, good or bad is a reaction and attention as far as kids are concerned. just ignore it. alot of kids go thru this kind of thing, and boys are notoriously difficult when it comes to things toilet related.
just take away his nappies. if he messes, make him help you clean it up but don't lose your temper or it will become a battle of wills, but do praise when he does go on the toilet.

Answer 7

I am a mother of four boys, ages 3-7. I kind of went through that with my 4 yr old. I finally got fed up with it. I told him that he would have to go to school in a pull up, he wore that diaper to school, after that he was never doing the dirty in his pants, or waiting until i put a dia per on him. he was the only one i had problems potty training. The rest were potty trained day and night by the time they were 2 1/2. when he asks for big boy things remind him he said he was a baby, not a big boy. Treat him like you did when he was 1. that should do the trick. BE FIRM to YOURSELF, dont give in

Answer 8

I did in home daycare for years.......Many of the children I watched would do things here for me (go to the bathroom, take a nap without a bottle or pacifier) but the minute their parent walked in the child would completely change!....They would want their baby things....I don't know if it was because of the BIG kids here or if they were just "playing" the parents....I know if you give in he will continue the behavior......If he does it at school there is no good reason he should not also do it at home....Quite giving in and make him do it at home too if it is bothering you.....Nobody likes to hear their child be upset but they will only be upset as long as it get them what they want from you......If it doesn't get them what they want they will quit......It is your choice really and they will not protest for very long....Especially if they are already doing it some place else....He know what he is doing and he is "playing" you and it is working!

Answer 9

Our oldest did exactly the same thing.

He loves monster trucks so if he went in the toilet 5 times in row he got a star...once he got 5 stars, he got a monster truck.

We gave him 5 trucks and then on the 5th one told him this was the last one and he has gone on the toilet since.

For toilet training, my BIG RECOMMENDATION is to be positive not negative in your reinforcement.

In terms of the baby talk...talk to him like an adult, he will snap out of it.

Good luck!!!

Answer 10

Nappy? Is that a diaper? Honey, theres not much that you can do. I think that its just a phase that he'll soon grow out of. Why dont you try giving him a sticker when ever hes uses the toilet, that seems to work for me and my son.