i went to a soccer game one night, with people not from my school. this girl came up to me and said, "my brother thinks you're hot, and wanted me to give you his myspace. he's too much of a chicken to tell you himself." and she gave me a piece of paper with a link and walked away. i didn't even know who he was. i went back home and added him, and he's REALLY REALLY REALLY attractive. he talked to me a little at first, and commented my pictures about how "gorgeous" i am and stuff. i get that a lot, not to be vain or anything. he asked for my screen name. i am only 14 years old, and a freshman. he is a 17 year old junior. BUT i told him i'm a 15 year old sophomore because i was afraid he'd think freshman are lame. he's kind of a little bit of a pervert, but all guys guys his age are so i'm not worried. he wants to hang out at the mall this weekend, and he just asked me on aim "do you kiss on the first date??"
i'm kind of nervous. how do i act? what should i say? what should i doooo?
2006-11-21 02:22:10 · 40 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
i read every answer i get.
2006-11-21 02:28:59 · update #1
Well first off you should stop lying about your age, and be very careful about hanging out with older guys that you believe are perverted.
What you are doing is a recipe for trouble.
He is one year off being an adult, you are barely a teenager. Be very careful, and try to hang out with people your own age.
2006-11-21 02:25:39 · answer #1 · answered by ZCT 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
First of all be yourself and not someone else. Lying is not cool! second, and i know this may be hard at 14, but what do you want out of life. If your goal is to out make with a 17yr old than i feel bad for you. Your first priority should be how to have some true self esteem, i'm sure you think you have some, but you really don't. Third, you need to come clean with this kid and really think about where you see this relationship going. First of all your 14 and he is probly leaving for college next fall, second your a liar and he may not like liars, and lastly you should focus your life on more positive things. in 10 yrs you will look back and see how silly this was, and how you should have paid more attention to advice you were given. Don't chase Men, let them chase you, and only pick the best of the best. But wait untill you are at least 18
2006-11-21 02:32:17 · answer #2 · answered by Gyasi M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three years is quite a difference. The first answer is correct, the second one is also correct. This is too delicate question and the answer that suits best depends on you and him. So you should decide yourself.
As for the kiss on the first date. I don't know about your oppinion, but I think that's kind of strange. Isn't the kiss something you should share with a trusted one?
And as final, don't think all guys are pervert at the last years of they teenage life. I just got 18 and have never behaved pervert or talked cynically. That's just my way, which causes me trouble sometimes, but I'm happy to remain true to myself.
If he's that way, you should better leave him alone!!!
As I told you - YOU ARE THE ONE THAT DECIDES. This is just my oppinion to the problem.
Good luck with your choise and take care.
p.s. You shouldn't have lied about your age. Anyone who judges of people by their age, looks or wealth is just dumb.
2006-11-21 02:52:37 · answer #3 · answered by Dimitar Hanrov 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all he thinks you are older than you are. Not good
Second you are underage and so is he
Third you said he is a pervert. Not all guys that age are so if you really don't trust him don't go to the mall.
If you have any doubts at all don't go.
If you do decide to go then bring a friend with you and stay in a busy part of the mall.
The compliments, while they may be true are just to make you feel special.
Tell him you don't kiss on a first date especially a stranger.
If you don't feel good about this then don't meet him. Change your email address and cut contact.
Usually your instincts are correct but what ever you do
be careful
2006-11-21 02:31:47 · answer #4 · answered by specs appeal 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok you said he is 17 and a little bit of a pervert. Well that tells you he is only after one thing. When i was 17 i went on a date with a guy i hardley even knew he ended up taking me to his house and the night was so horrifying. I didn't think i was going to make it out alive. I'm not trying to scare you but you never know what could happen. I can't say what happen to me that night but you probably can figure what happened . He's still in prison. Just watch out and be extra safe and please don't do anything you don't want to do.
2006-11-21 02:30:36 · answer #5 · answered by Qt PIE 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, sweetie. You NEED to tell him the truth about your age. Most states now consider 17 to be the legal age of an adult and your still a minor. What if you do hook up with his guy and your parents find out and press charges against him for statutory rape? that could ruin his life, he would be registered as a sex offender for the rest of his life, on top of possibly serving jail time. Now that ive said that, I'll say that he is only after 1 thing and it isnt your heart. It might be fun but i promise, in the end, all you'll be is hurt and used. Find some one who likes you for the real you and not what you have in your panties.
2006-11-21 02:33:12 · answer #6 · answered by Danelle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A seventeen year old perv isn't much to brag about, no matter how cute. If you don't know if you kiss on the first date or not, then you may not be experienced enough for him, something that will make you uncomfortable with him, also, knowing that your are younger than you said you are will keep you wondering when that bomb will drop if you keep seeing him. Be honest, and see if he still wants to see you at the mall.
By the way, I wouldn't consider it a date untill he asks you to go somewhere with him and he picks you up and spends some money on you and takes you home. Till then its just a meeting.
2006-11-21 02:32:13 · answer #7 · answered by justa 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You see little one, you are on a public forum so anyone can come here and answer you seriously or not. Lying is not the way to start off a relationship! You are to young for him and you know it or you wouldn't have lied! You are to young to judge if his perversion is OK or not. You will get in trouble with your parents too! You are to young to have a boyfriend and be dating. Your not knowing how to act should tell you, that you aren't ready yet!! Give it another couple years when you are more mature and can handle situations better. Don't rush growing up, it will only lead to trouble!
2006-11-21 02:28:47 · answer #8 · answered by wish I were 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, just take it easy, he might want to go faster than you are ready for since he is 17 and you are 14. But I dont think lying to him was a good frst step. you should have just told him you were 14, I am sure it would have not made a difference.
It is normal to be nervous no a first date, but dont worry, you will know what to do. A kiss on the first date is good, but if he is going straight to the honey pot, girl leave him in the dust. He may be a nice guy and treat you genuinely nice, but if he doesnt, dont worry girl, there are plently of ncie guys out there.
So just take it easy and becareful, you have no idea who he is.
I am not trying ot scare you are anything, but just incase you get carried away remeber HPV is not prevented by wearing a condom. It is the only std that is not protectable. It is said that 80% of amercians get it at one point in their life.
Just take care of yourself and remeber to have fun with this guy. If he is not into what you are into, just forget him :)
2006-11-21 02:28:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I find it interesting that he wouldnt talk to you at first but used another female to give you a message then he straight out asks you if you kiss on the first date I would be careful of a person like this make sure you stay in full public view all the time while you are out at the mall .Football team guys tend to attract girls very easy and by getting this other girl to give you the message sounds like he didnt want to be seen with you in front of other girls he knew at the game so be carefull take plenty of time to get to know this person face to face because I bet his next question is to do with sex and he can brag to his mates he got another one on the weekend .
2006-11-21 02:36:25 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Seriously, you should be flattered and leave it at that. You are only 14 years old and he is 17.He could get into a great deal of trouble dating someone your age. And he only has one thing in mind, and you should not be doing what he has in mind.You are obviously an attractive young lady, and you have plenty of time, trust me, you are going to have a great deal of offers coming your way as you get older. Don't be stupid and do something you will regret for a very long time. Good luck and God bless****
2006-11-21 02:29:04 · answer #11 · answered by ? 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋