This is a long story but basicallly i was in a friends with benefits relationship with older woman with 3 kids and she apparently had bipolar. This ended due to her sleeping with about 3 other men.
It has been 3 months now but I still think about her quite abit which has affected my work and study. We used to work in the same building until about 3 months ago. I have emailed her a couple of times but no reply from her that was at the start. I have deleted her mobile number from phone but as I still work in same organisation I always have access to her e-mail and telephone number. I have rang her on this a couple of times but I know that it is always on voice mail anyway. I am patting myself on the back at the moment for refusing to go and see her at work and going to her house as I know this would cause conflict.
Still a bit worried about my thinking about her a lot, I don't want to become some sort of stalker and get a bad name.
2006-11-21 00:14:04 · 19 answers · asked by ppuer d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
no i think you are a normal human
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2006-11-21 00:15:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would not consider you a stalker, if you were in a relationship with her for a considerably length of time alot of what you feel could be curiosity as to what she's doing now, however starting with the main issue bipolar, that should have been enough to call it quits, friends with benefits? So you never really considered her anything else anyway, so let go the so called benefits have ended, and if this didn't do it maybe you have other issues, sleeping with about 3 other men? All curiosity should have immediately ceased! Good luck, find another friend with benefits, just make sure the next one don't have other issues that come along with her benefits.
2006-11-21 00:28:08 · answer #2 · answered by yahoo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not a stalker, you're in love.
How long it takes for you to get over this all depends on you. You don't neccessarily need to go out and find someone else right away, because if you do and you're not over this other woman yet, then it won't be fair to the new girl.
I would say that you don't try and contact her at all anymore, and that you find something to do that will take your mind off of her.
Good luck getting over losing someone you were in love with - it sucks!
2006-11-21 00:28:49 · answer #3 · answered by Mister 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first let me say that breaking up w/ her because she was sleeping w/ other guys is stupid...you were a friends with benefits, that gives you NO rights over who/how many men she sees. Second, you need to MOVE on I didn't read anywhere in your post where you said that you have even talked to her in this time, OR she has returned any of your attempts at trying to contact her...you have been doing this for 3 months, the name might already be out. Move On!
2006-11-21 00:20:13 · answer #4 · answered by BiancaVee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you're not a stalker...yet. It's hard getting over someone and it takes time to completely heal, whether it ended badly or not. You'll be fine. Try your best not to call her. Take one step at a time. It's great you're resisting to actually see her. Keep up the good work and take things slowly. You'll be okay, just need some time that's all. Best of luck!
2006-11-21 00:18:10 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're not a stalker yet. And you do seem to respect her right to decide not to be in contact with you. As long as you continue to do that, you'll not be a threat.
If you're still thinking about her a lot, perhaps you need to add something new to your life--join a group that does something you're interested in or take up a new hobby.
2006-11-21 00:19:42 · answer #6 · answered by liz_in_adam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as you don't go any further than you already have, I wouldn't consider you a stalker. If you go far enough to find her and keep up with her, that would constitute stalking. It sounds like you started to view her as more than a friend with benefits; but it doesn't sound like she's a stable relationship prospect.
2006-11-21 00:19:12 · answer #7 · answered by mreheather6 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
some times its good to get away and try and meet new people.90% chance out of 100 is that you have just got use to thinking about it . thats why you are going mentle in the brain 3 months is a long time.
2006-11-21 00:40:25 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no i don't think you are a stalker
you like this woman but shes not interested in you and don't want to contact you. i guess you got the message. so move on and find someone whos better than her. Go out with your friends and have a break from your work.
2006-11-21 00:19:40 · answer #9 · answered by AnGeL 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Doesn't sound like you are are a stalking, sounds like you have fallen for her. patting yourself on your back for not seeing her as "it may cause conflict" i dare say that is the statement which tells me you have to move on, obviously you owuldn't of said that without reason. She hasn't contacted you, after these attempts? Your only going to harm yourself by thinking about her constantly when she doesn't feel the same, move on.
2006-11-21 00:28:33 · answer #10 · answered by Baylee_J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a stalker is somewhat similar to a spy, or a predator preparing to pounce on its prey...
and you are not doing that, you are just thinking about her and making efforts in contacting her,,and i salute you for the respect your giving her. you are not disrespecting her privacy or force your way to her,and that is what i call respect...just try your best but also know when to stop...she may only be busy or she may also not be really interested...
2006-11-21 00:26:37 · answer #11 · answered by four_eyed_ninja 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋