i have a friend who sometimes has "crushes" or "infatuations" on older guys.i.e. assistant swim coach, teachers, etc. do you think its okay? she's 15 and most of these guys are in their twenties. i don't know if this is okay and not that important or if something should be done about it.
2006-11-20 12:58:34 · 26 answers · asked by Olivia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It's called puppy love
Most young teens get it for older people (men and women) but it should NEVER be acted upon. It's illegal and a little distrubing.
In addition the old people have a responsibility to not let it happen or talk advantage of their positions of athority.
Just be her friend and you will both joke about it in the future
2006-11-20 13:02:48 · answer #1 · answered by Karce 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does she come from a broken home (parents are divorced or just lives with a single mother)?
It sounds to me like she likes older men because she probably needs someone that will make her feel safe and give her stuff (boys that are 15 are usually broke and immature).
So as a friend you need to help her understand that what she is feeling is not right. Also, aside from being completely illegal, only a man that is totally looking to take advantage would date a 15 year old when he is over 20.
2006-11-20 21:03:56 · answer #2 · answered by jules_xcess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do you feel the need to "do something about it?" are the guys actually dating her or encouraging her? if they are, then definitely get involved. if not, then just let her have her fantasies. most girls find older men attractive due to the love they have for their fathers or older brothers and just don't realize it at the time. i always found older men "distinguished" and sexy, when i was in my teens, but when i realized what the total physical love relationship involved, i was grossed out by older men, thinking they'd be gross naked. that's a normal stage of interest in the opposite sex, and it's actually appropriate for her at that age to find the older guys sexy and attractive. she'll come around. just trust her and keep an eye out for the older letches that encourage or pursue her. good luck!
2006-11-20 21:02:36 · answer #3 · answered by vrandolph62 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi,,, personally, i think that is normal behavior,,, the problem is when or if she takes it a step further,,, Lots of coaches in particular get fired and or wose, fired and sent to prison for sex offenders.... because of a little innocent fun to begin with turns into something else.....
Remind your friend that if she really likes these guys,,, that she will keep it to herself.... and not let them know about it....
Hope this helps,,,,
good luck
2006-11-20 21:03:13 · answer #4 · answered by eejonesaux 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For some girls it is normal, but she needs to be careful. If she gets too forward and the opportunity arises, she may get a lot more than she was bargaining for. Men are men, and they always seem to think a girl wants what they want. (Which is usually VERY mature). She needs to be aware that she might have to deal with a lot more than the kissing, cuddling, and hand holding she wants. She may not be able to handle it.
2006-11-20 21:02:52 · answer #5 · answered by musemessmer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry, infatuation literally means foolish love because it can't/won't be reciprocated, you'll grow out of it and come to realise what a good thing it was that you chose men who didn't/wouldn't reciprocate.
Just don't go throwing yourself at them or it really does get embarrassing!
2006-11-20 21:02:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i remember when i was in high school we got a new teacher he was a tall good looking younger man just out of college i believe and all the girls were totally inlove with the guy, but he was married and was always just sweet . and i had another teacher who got involved with one of his students and that wasnt ok. you see the difference. one is just looking and the man being flattered but goes no where and one is illegal.
2006-11-20 21:42:04 · answer #7 · answered by moe 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sure its ok and normal i had a crush on my science teacher and i also had a crush on the little girl and little boys dad u use ta baby seat for and they was in there 30's
2006-11-20 21:22:32 · answer #8 · answered by Jeannie T 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's natural to a point! If she's like the type of girl who attempts to start things then... that's a problem.
2006-11-20 21:00:40 · answer #9 · answered by Destinee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she is 15 too, it;s kind of inappropriate for her to be hitting on older guyz in their 20's....first of all she will get in trouble and 2nd, the other person/teacher will get in trouble so it'd be better if u told her to back off and stick to people her own age! tell her its ok if she has SMALL VERY SMALL crushes on them but don't let her goo overboard like want to TOUCH him or sumthing..ew
2006-11-20 21:02:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋