Back in Feb. 06' i turned 18 and decided i didnt have to listen to my mom and i had some insurance money. i started talking to some guy in detroit on a 1-800 number and i decided to go meet him and when i got there i meet him at the busstation and went to his house. he was very abusive such as when he burned my finger or taking advantage of me. now i have a 18 day old baby and im afraid to tell the people that i remember who he is bc if i do i the court will make us have joint custody since i live two states away and im afraid he will beat on my baby or burn him i dont know what to do
2006-11-20 11:44:05 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Other - Pregnancy & Parenting
Dont have a friend say they are the father, like someone else suggested, becasue then that friend will be legally responsible and have to give you child support, that is crazy. Best bet is to just tell people you arent sure who the father is, tell them you met him out somewhere and had a one night stand, you might look a little on the "easy" side but atleast then your baby would be safe.
What you should have done is reported him for abuse and taking advantage of you when it first happened, he would have been arrested and then if you did name him as the father chances are they would never allow a abuser/rapist to have the child
2006-11-20 12:10:45 · answer #1 · answered by Lori R 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I doubt whether the courts would allow him access to the baby.
You need to do something about him though to stop him from treating other women the same way. Abuse is a serious offence. It is a hard decision to make especially as you obviously don't want him to know about the baby.
2006-11-20 11:53:11 · answer #2 · answered by Maryrose 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't see why they would make you get joint custody, especially since this man has an abusive history. if you can get witnesses to his abusive behavior, than it should be ok; no one would let a child live with someone who might hurt them intentionally. however, if you're still owrried, than i guess remaining silent is your only option. but you should speak up because you can get child support from him, regardless of whether he has visitation or not.
2006-11-20 11:54:55 · answer #3 · answered by Duelen 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree. don't tell them it was a friend. just say you where drunk and it was a one night stand.
but here in the uk you can't name the father on the birth certificate unless he is with you at the time of registering the birth and also if you claim benefit here and they ask for the fathers details you can say that you don't want him to be contacted if you think that either you or the baby wil be in danger.
hope this helps and good luck with your new baby!
2006-11-20 12:18:25 · answer #4 · answered by acemum 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best advice is to keep the mouth closed. If he abused you he will abuse your baby. I know you don't want that. So maybe the best thing to do is try to mend the fences with your parents, or try to make it on your own with your baby.
2006-11-20 11:52:16 · answer #5 · answered by Amanda A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From your story, sounds a lot like you were raped to me. Most women who are raped don't know who the father is. In all reality, you really didn't know who the father was. I would never tell.
2006-11-20 12:19:57 · answer #6 · answered by mom of 2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get help , get a restaining order..DONT CHAT ONLINE over 60 women have been killed going to meet people online. Bevery careful.
2006-11-20 11:48:22 · answer #7 · answered by gotta_issue 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keeping quite may be the safest option in this case.
2006-11-20 11:48:20 · answer #8 · answered by cailieco 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋