SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet. FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle. ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling.
SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet. FAULT: Improper bladder control. ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training.
SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless. FAULT: Glass empty. ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.
SYMPTOM: Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights. FAULT: You have fallen over backward. ACTION: Have yourself leashed to bar.
SYMPTOM: Mouth contains cigarette butts. FAULT: You have fallen forward. ACTION: See above.
SYMPTOM: Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet. FAULT: Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face. ACTION: Retire to restroom, practice in mirror.
SYMPTOM: Floor blurred. FAULT: You are looking through bottom of empty glass. ACTION: Get someone to buy you another beer.
SYMPTOM: Floor moving. FAULT: You are being carried out. ACTION: Find out if you are being taken to another bar.
SYMPTOM: Room seems unusually dark. FAULT: Bar has closed. ACTION: Confirm home address with bartender.
SYMPTOM: Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures. FAULT: Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations. ACTION: Cover mouth.
SYMPTOM: Everyone looks up to you and smiles. FAULT: You are dancing on the table. ACTION: Fall on somebody cushy-looking.
SYMPTOM: Beer is crystal-clear. FAULT: It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up. ACTION: Punch him.
SYMPTOM: Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear. FAULT: You have been in a fight. ACTION: Apologize to everyone you see, just in case it was them.
SYMPTOM: Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in. FAULT: You've wandered into the wrong party. ACTION: See if they have free beer.
SYMPTOM: Your singing sounds distorted. FAULT: The beer is too weak. ACTION: Have more beer until your voice improves.
SYMPTOM: Don't remember the words to the song. FAULT: Beer is just right. ACTION: Play air guitar.
2006-11-20 05:40:14 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
LMFAO Been there done that!! LMAO :))
Makes me think of when I awoke because of being cold. I awoke and water was up to my nose in bathtub. And was still running (by this time) cold as hell! Luckily there were those few holes that kept the water from overflowing or drowning me first! LMFAO
Great!!!!
2006-11-20 08:09:31 · answer #1 · answered by Dana A 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simply Superb !! Ecah and every Trouble and the way suggested to shoot it out, was simply great ! Got impressed !! Too funny and hilarious ! A nice pice of work by a brain with an excellent sense of Humour and I liked them all !!!
2006-11-20 05:51:49 · answer #2 · answered by Tickler 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Symptom: not laughing. Fault:Joke lacked depth. Axion: Drink more beer?
2006-11-20 05:51:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
finally I know why at the end of each party the floor is moving and my legs not
2006-11-20 06:11:43 · answer #4 · answered by Joanna L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
pmsl 10/10
2006-11-20 05:56:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Gosh, are you psychic? You just described my last night out to a 'T'
LOL
2006-11-20 06:08:26 · answer #6 · answered by Kizzy_ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bar the last one it sounds like a normal Saturday night, have you been stalking me and taking notes.
2016-05-21 23:47:33 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very funny mate , i'v been there so many times !!
2006-11-20 05:47:43 · answer #8 · answered by nicemanvery 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
faaar toooo much time on your hands
2006-11-20 05:44:38 · answer #9 · answered by lumpy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
invaluable. tanks a bunch lad..
2006-11-20 05:44:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋