I aked if you like someone what should you do and people say ask them out. But when I asked my mum and friends they say never ask them out and let the come to you. Why is that?
2006-11-20 03:31:34 · 18 answers · asked by Dreamer 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'm going to presume that you're female.
I'll never forget what my Mum said to me about her and my Dad(50yrs married soon). She said
"I chased your Dad until he caught me."
Took me a while to understand that but I have never asked a man out and never had any trouble getting one if I wanted to.
My Mum 'taught' me that there are loads of ways to let someone know you're interested without marching over and putting yourself out on a limb and most men I know would presume that they were on a 'sure thing' if a woman asked them out-not how you want to go into a first date/ budding relationship situation.
Try using your feminine whiles, we all have them and when used correctly will produce stunning results. I can honestly say that prolonged eye contact and a well placed smile meant that I had loads of dates when younger without putting myself out on a limb-and now I'm older and married I use it socially for getting served and keeping the other half in check.
That's why your Mum and friends say 'let them come to you' , because they care enough to know that 'on a plate' isn't the way to go long term.
2006-11-20 04:27:17 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if a guy comes after you it means he is interested in you and would like to get to know you and probably hope to build something with you one day depending how serious it can get. Although if you really like someone and aren't sure if he likes you the best thing to do is approach him and find out. The worst thing that can happen is he will say no, then you say OK, put your tail between your legs and move on. Women take rejection a lot more serious than guys do we are used to it. While women tend to take it to heart and get scared for life and will probably never bounce back. I think your mom and friends are protecting you from rejection. Like they say take it like a man and go for it. Rejection is a part of life. I say you only live once. If you like him go for him or your best Friend will.
2006-11-20 03:51:59 · answer #2 · answered by george 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be sure 100% that he likes you, sweetheart, because it'll hurt if he says no. My friend recently asked out a boy called Jack, and he just wasn't intrested. Of course, they were good friends, but you have to know the difference. What if he likes you only as a friend? You have to know the difference before you do anything! I hope this helped.
2006-11-20 03:38:59 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anyone called "mum" is usually pretentious and too stuck on themselves to go ask. If you wait for a guy to ask, you'll only get the jerks with an attitude. You have to go ask because usually the guys that are too shy to ask are more sensitive and in touch with their feelings.
2006-11-20 03:39:40 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because back when your mom was a teenager, it was considered totally disrespectful for the girls to confront the guys and ask them out on dates. Today I feel that it is still disrespectful, but the way that girls are today they don't look at it that way, they seem to think that it is fine to disrespect them selves. But its not! Girls do not like it that the guys today consider them as hoes but by coming on to the guys the way that a lot of young girls/women do today what else can they expect? It does not only make the guys feel more confident in the girl that plays hard to get, it also makes the girl feel more confident in her self because he is not looking at her as an easy piece of ***, He is showing her that he respects her not disrespects her.
I hope you understand my meaning
Happy Thanksgiving.
2006-11-20 04:03:08 · answer #5 · answered by bigred 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you like someone let them know but dont do all the chaasing once they are aware. I think your Mum and friends mean play a little hard to get.
If he likes you he will approach you.
2006-11-20 03:36:34 · answer #6 · answered by Scatty 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Different generations. You mother lived in a different time
The PC world of today can see men getting themselves into trouble for approaching womaen they way they used to.
2006-11-20 03:50:22 · answer #7 · answered by The Guru 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want to be with someone, you can't always sit back like a princess on a throne and wait for them to come to you. there's nothing wrong with taking initiative. what if the person you like is shy? what if they don't even know you exist? what if they like you but won't ask you out because they're afraid you don't like them? what if they don't like girls who can't take charge?
just don't chase anyone. if you've made it obvious that you like them by asking them out, THEN wait for them to come to you. don't just throw yourself at the person and keep bugging them to be with you.
2006-11-20 03:36:43 · answer #8 · answered by Jenn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its a risk, cause the other person might feel the same, and then neither of you will ask each other out.
2006-11-20 03:35:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because then you know they really like you and are not jsut being polite or too shy to say 'no'.
2006-11-20 03:33:56 · answer #10 · answered by nlj1520 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋