What should i do?

Question

I have been with my boyfriend 27 months and he is definately the one. I love him so much, we have been living together for 18 months.
His family live in Spain and he was meant to be moving across there to live there but he fell in love with me and decided to stay because he didnt want to leave me.
His family are now wanting to move to Australia and planning to move across there in about 18 months time... and my boyfriend wants to go, but said he will only go if i go.
He is so close with his family, honestly, i have never seen any family closer... his dad is like his best friend.
I feel so guilty because i dont want to go. I would be leaving my friend and family behind and i couldnt handle not seeing them.

SHould i break up with him? thats the only way he will go without me. I couldnt face him resenting me for him not going in years to come.

Answer 1

JUST PACK AND GO WITH HIM

Answer 2

Don't break up with him yet. My sister had a similar dilemma with not wanting to live in Oz because of family and friends, so her and her boyfriend went to Oz for one year to try it out. She then made her decision to stay. We are in contact via the internet and all family members have webcams so we can see each other regularly.
Go there on a tourist visa for 6 months. Try it out and then make a decision. Or, if you're under 30 you can get a working visa for a year. Don't give up on your relationship so quickly but also think that it has be a joint decision and there has to be give and take on both sides. Try and come to some sort of compromise.
Good luck.

Answer 3

If you won't go because you'd miss your family and friends, you have to realise how badly he'll want to go. I understand that he's the one but for now it could be best to break up. People I know of who have moved to Australia either love it or hate it and chances are he might move back - especially if you're not there - which means you can carry on where you started. If he doesn't decide to move back then at least you can rest assured that you've done the right thing. He'll realise that this sacrifice is heartbreaking for you (and him) but ultimately it'll show how much you love him. Better to have loved and lost that to never have loved at all.

Good luck.

Answer 4

How do you know you couldn't handle being so far away until youve tried it? Is it really fair to sit him down and tell him you couldn't do it when you haven't experienced it? Doesn't he still have a very close bond with his family even after living away from them with you? When will you leave the nest and find your place? Perhaps treat it like a holiday and see how it goes. If you love him it must be worth the try.......Good luck and don't stress - time will tell.

Answer 5

If he is definitely the one then you should not break up with him. People go through life trying to find the one. In this case you can eat your cake and have it. I see no reason why you cant do Australia now and come back to your present location later. The important thing is to stay together.

Answer 6

oh, seems your stuck between a rock and a hard place hun, this is a difficult situation...why not suggest that he stays with you, BUT go over there for a few months (with you) for a break, you never know, you may like it there, i am leaving for Spain next month, (not as far as Aussie land) but i too will be leaving my friends and family who i will miss so much, it took me weeks of sleepless nights to finally decide that this is what i wanted, change is difficult, but this could be a chance in a lifetime for you, and if you don't go you may regret it, so why not go for them months and see how i goes, it will give you time to adapt...i think your boyfriend will be so upset if you finish with him but like you said, he is very close to his folks, and you have alot of friends and family here, you can also make new friends over there, so now you have to decide whats good for you, he wants to go, you want to stay but you love him, he loves you, you have 18 months to decide, so sit with him and talk seriously about this, it's a huge step to take...talk to him hun, also talk to your friends and ask for their opinions, they will want you to be happy, and i think they will tell you to go if your boyfriend makes you happy that's the only thing you can do.....you may both come up with something on an amicable level......also it may be a nice holiday for your friends and family too...they could come to see you....what ever you decide, ......good luck.......x

Answer 7

What ever it is ..Parents are the first preference

Dont leave them
He seems to be a nice guy but still Talk to him n explain your problem

You can get married n den you can go wid him

But dont leave your parents before marrying

After marraige anyways u have to stay away from your parents so that time you have to manage

Answer 8

Wow, that is a really tough one. But yes, it does sound like you are pretty much out of options. You are right about not wanting him to resent you which more than likely would happen, nor can you sacrifice your own life and happiness just for him. I know it suck and it hurts, but just sit down and tell him openly and honestly how you truly feel and see what he says. but it sounds like you dont really have any other options

Answer 9

Instead of jumping ahead you should talk to your partner and explain that you don't want to be so far away from your family either but there could be some compromise such as visiting his family regularly. If he is truly the one then you have to overcome these hurdles, not just break up so that you don't have to deal with it.

Answer 10

Go with him, don't give up love or the best possibility to leave this place for a better life, with telephones and the Internet you can stay in contact with your family.

Answer 11

Hmm. Is there any way you can go to Australia for just a little while to see what you think and then move back if you don't like it? I'd suggest that, if at all possible.