is this guy afraid - to look me in the eyes again?

Question

he &me had a 9 month love affair. he always refused protection, but i refused to be careless. until weeks ago. i wanted to trust him and do love him. even though i knew it might be a risk. i was just so happy and love blinded me. after a long time not seeing him, i "freaked out" and fell from the clouds. i had fear of not knowing his past and of a possible hiv infection. i called him and asked him to make the test. he cheered me up a little. sweet. wanted to go there if i needed to be sure. i told him he kind of put me back in tracks. i was glad first. but now, since this call where he reassured me and cheered me up, i have not heard from him since 2 weeks :-( it is a long story...some things make it impossible for us to be closer. but as far as i can, i do love him in a special way. i tolerate his way and i really really appreciate and love him. but now...

what is it? is he afraid? angry i dared to think such a thing of him? does he feel like i overpassed a barrier & now hiding from

i know it is easy to call him coward. but it's not what i want to call him. he does have an own life to care about.. long story. but i want to come clean with him. want to talk and make him realize importance of such an issue. he seemed to live careless and now might be just as afraid as i was. WHAT DO I DO, CALL HIM, MEET HIM OR TEXT HIM I NEEDED TO SEE HIM? i care about him.

Answer 1

A little confused…. you say you refuse to be careless but you had a nine month love affair where he always refused protection. It doesn't seem like you are protecting yourself.

I think you need to stop caring about him because he's not caring about you. And since he refuses protection I'm sure he's refused that with many other women. Doubt he's going to break his pattern of the way he wants to have sex just for you.

HIV is just one of the sexually transmitted diseases don't forget there's a lot more. Hepatitis B and C, herpes, viruses that eventually cause cervical cancer (HPV) and genital warts..etc...

I think you've already contacted him and given him a chance. Respect time is over. Drop him… go to Planned Parenthood or clinic and get checked out. Remember the diseases last a lot longer than the relationships !

NOTE - HPV and genital warts are now preventable by a new vaccine called Gardasil. It is recommended for women 9 to 26 years of age. The vaccine guards against 70% of all cervical cancers and 90% of all genital warts. Men do not know they're infected and show no symptoms at all. There is no vaccine for the men at this time. Why is it recommended for such a young age and then cut off at 26? Because the FDA, rightly so, believes that after 26 women have had enough unprotected sex that they are infected with the virus and the vaccine at that point will not be effective or help. That's pretty sad when he think about it. That PAP smear the doctor does each year is hunting for the cancer this virus causes. While you'll still probably need a PAP smear this vaccine increases your odds dramatically that'll always come back negative. The link is Gardasil.com and the drug company is Merck (one of the largest in the world)


Mark
Author GirlsTellAll
[e-mail]
Everyone ask - (the girl in the photo behind me IS the model on the book cover)

Answer 2

He is bad news.

1. He never should have persued you. You know it was wrong because of "the complication".

2. He never should have insisted that you not use protection.

3. He shouldn't be offended that you asked him for a test. After all, he slept with someone he sholdn't have--who knows how many others he did the same with?

Get over this guy. He's not for you.

Answer 3

Call him. What have you got to lose? Besides your life I mean, if he's HIV. And get yourself tested.