Me or him?

Question

I need help. I am a freshman who is totally lost. When i was in middle school i used to be the bad azz kid. It totally rocked. I mean i loved it so much!! I was a jack morman. Witch means i was just preteding to be my religon. But then someone new moved to my town. My best friend now. He turned me around. But be as that may my old self was bad. He showed me how to be good. And i kinda adopted his personallity. No... I did. I have totally lost myself. Now im dull as ever and need help. How do i find myself again? I kant even remember what I used to be like. But now im a good morman with maybe 7 or 8 friends.2 really good ones. I used to like the old me so much better.

Answer 1

be yourself

Answer 2

I guess your are 15-16 years of age.at this age you being confused is normal.the issue is not me or him but it is about you alone. you need to just be by your self and try to think what YOU WANT IN LIFE> IS IT ATTENTION SEEKING OR SOMEONE TO LOVE YOU AS YOU ARE> the very fact that this person was able to influence you shows that he had accepted you as you are and you have started hero worshipping him and imitating him. this is why you are restless.
talk to some elder and try to be yourself. being good need not be being boring.you can always have fun in a good way. life is full of energy and col or and fun especially at your age. do not stick around with this friend all the time. play games and make more Friends and start living the life you want.

Answer 3

If you feel as if you are not being true to yourself, you should try to find who you are now. You are not, however, who you used to be. So trying to be that person will only be even more like acting. As far as your religion...do you really believe in it? I will not go into whether it is a good religion or not, but if you do not believe in the teachings, you should try and find a religion that you can believe in. If you go crazy and start acting out or rebelling hard core, it will only bring consequences that you will regret in the long run. Trust me, I am speaking from experience.
As far as your friends...if they are true friends, they will not care what your beliefs are. I would not expect that your friends (if they are mormon) are going to be very open minded about your need to find yourself. Especially if that includes questioning your religion. But I may be wrong.
But I definitely say that if you are not feeling like you are you, you need to find out who you are to find happiness.

Answer 4

try to maintain some gap with your friend and just think what you used to do before and start doing all those things again. if you are comfortable then go ahead else be a good morman. all the best.

Answer 5

The question shouldn't be "me or him". It should be about what is good for you when it comes to your chances of getting through school and building a decent and comfortable life for yourself. It should be about what is good for your health too.

You're probably about 15 years old if you're a freshman. Kids your age need to figure out who they are. I don't know how "bad" you were before, but now you're looking at your high school years; and those matter when it comes to what you get for opportunities after you graduate. Your brain and bones won't be finished developing for another 8 to 10 years; so your thinking is the thinking of a very young person.

There's a lot of middle ground between being bad and being a mormon. You need to find that middle ground if you don't feel that being a good mormon is what's right for you. Bear in mind, though, that, dull as it may be, being "good" over the next few years probably offers you more in terms of your future than being "bad" does.

You call your old self "bad". Maybe you were just being immature. One of the biggest challenges to young people is being able to resist the wish to have fun sometimes and instead choose the thing that is healthy or good for your future. Maybe it didn't matter all that much if you were "bad" before, but at your age and with being grown-up getting as close as it is, now it probably matters more.

Being a good person doesn't have to mean being dull. You would have to find things that interest you or things to do that are fun - and, believe it or not, they exist. Your problem right now may be that you've lost the fun and taken on being good and now concluded (incorrectly) that you can't have fun and be good at the same time. You can. Part of being your age, though, is to find the things that interest you and make you feel exhilarated that are good for you rather than bad. Part of being your age, too, is being horrendously bored. People your age are too old to be happy with how they were a year or so ago but they're too young to be able to do the things that make life less dull and more promising.

It is possible for people who get too deep into religion of any kind to start to feel they've lost themselves. (Sometimes, too, though, losing an old self that was bad for you and your future isn't such a bad thing.) You probably already realize you're very fortunate to have a friend who has been a good influence on you. Still, maybe you need to expand your group of friends more so that you can be with some non-mormons who are still good people. Stay away from anyone who is "bad".

Maybe the old you was more fun, but - if you're really honest about it - was that old you really good for you, your health, and your future? You know, another term for a "bad azz" is "loser". Maybe when you were 12 or 13 it was fun, but that kind of behavior will put you straight on the path to being a loser rather than having opportunities.

Try to separate the fact that you had more fun then from the idea that you are only you when you're being bad. Ask yourself if your idea that being good is so dull just comes from an immature notion that being bad is cool and being good is dull. Ask yourself if you really want to go back and be that kid who was probably headed for serious trouble.

Maybe being a good mormon isn't quite for you, and maybe friends who aren't mormons would make you feel a little happier; but try, too, to think of how these kids who are good kids have been good friends to you and how - even if you're not having big, exciting, fun right now - their behavior won't lead you into serious trouble.

You have time to find yourself, and at your age you aren't going to find yourself no matter who you have for friends. Maybe, too, though, the mormon faith is a little stricter than many people your age like; and there's probably a way to stay good and keep doing what is good for you and your future and yet have a little more fun.

Ask yourself what you want for yourself - whether you want to have good grades and get a good job and be healthy. Ask if you like yourself and whether the old, bad, you was not really you but was, instead, just having more fun than you have now. Think about yourself as a very young child (four years old maybe), and imagine if that were your child what you'd want for that child.

Ask yourself, too, if you really weren't all that bad. For example, some religions say listening to rock music or playing video games or dancing is "bad". Is the "bad" you're talking about stuff that really isn't bad at all, or was it genuinely bad?

Part of what you're going through may be more about the dullness of being fifteen or so rather than whether you want to be good or bad. I can't help but wonder if you didn't really lose the old you but instead never quite found the real you.

Consider talking to someone like a counselor at school or some other sensible adult. You're young and it seems like you need someone to help you sort out at least some of it.

Answer 6

You sound very confused. Talk to a trusted adult about how you feel. Write down your thoughts. Maybe spend a day to yourself----to find the person "you use to be."?? good luck...

Answer 7

There is nothing worse than being a Mormon. Even if you end up sleeping on the streets.

Answer 8

send a less time with him/her then try andremeber ho u are and what more to be

Answer 9

pick what ever you think is better