My room-mate is always irritating me. When she has a problem, she wants everyone to be involved in it. For instance, there were ants in her room and she asked me to help her check for the nest so that she can put some insecticide to kill them. But, I had 2 study that night because I have a paper to sit for 2moro. So, one hour of my study time was wasted just to help her. Another example is when her computer was infected by viruses. She asked me to look at her computer. And I mean LOOK literally! At that time, I was so busy concentrating on other things! She's always asking me to do this and that when I have other things to do. It feels as if I don't have time for myself. It's so irritating!
2006-11-19 16:53:49 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Good question, this one can be tough at times. There are a few things you can do about the situation, first determine is your roomate just that a roomate, or are they a good friend? If they are simply a roomate then you have the option of closing the door and trying to simply tell them that you do not have time and consider providing alternate places he/she can check for resources to the probelms they are coming to you with. However as I speak with expereince this is alot easier said than done. Try these things out, they should help to solve your problems:
1. Talk, communicate with your roomate... but not when they have annoyed you. Just bring it up when both of you are in plesent states of mind. Tell them you don't want to hurt their feelings but you have times when you can not be bothered.
2. Close the door or make a sign.. It sounds silly but a simple post it note on the door can let your roomate know that you are working and do not have the time to answer qustions at this time. This will save you from an argument or being angry, as well as disturbed.
3. Schedule time for yourself. Take just a look at your schedule, if you are extreemly busy make 5 minutes of your day just time for you. Take a drive or walk to a store, grab a soda. This will help you to relax and think, and let you not feel smothered by rooamtes and work / school.
4. Make a tentative "question and answer" time with your roomate. This way they will have to wait untill that time to ask questions. If it is something simple they may figure out their answer before they have to ask you. They often just need to be faced with the fact that they can answer their own questions if they take the time to do it.
There are other little things you can do but most of all try to communicate at all times. if one person does not communicate with the other (or both) That infact is when things to start to fail and feelings get hurt.
Best of luck!
Cheers!
M
http://www.pr6.com
2006-11-19 17:10:05 · answer #1 · answered by pr6 design las vegas 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Explain to your roommate that you would like to help her, but you can't right then and there. If she has trouble understanding this, then its time for her to realize that her problems are not the be all / end all of the universe and that help requires some input as well. How did she end up with so many viruses on her computer? Why were there ants in her room? She is going to have to learn that by getting herself into situations like these, shes going to have to work on them herself as well. At first, your roommate may be taken back by this, and it may even cause friction between you two. However, when you are available, then you can approach her and say, "Alright, what were you talking about, I can help you now." Help her on your schedule, but only say you can if you can.
2006-11-20 00:59:37 · answer #2 · answered by J. R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't have time say so. As for bugging you about the bugs that is something you should call your landlord and have maintenance come fix problems like that. I often had a roommate who would ask me to do things all the time. Finally i just said i didn't have time and she stopped asking.
2006-11-20 00:57:38 · answer #3 · answered by viscomunderground 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you shouldn't feel obligated to help her all the time , when you have time you should sit her down and tell her how you feel. If shes a true friend and roommate she would understand and give you the respect you deserve and give your space when you need to do more important things to do
2006-11-20 01:01:19 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to be honest with her, and tell her that you have alot of things you are doing right now and tell her to waite, i think any roomate would want anyones honesty and you need to be honest with her and tell her that she is irritating you right now.
2006-11-20 01:11:39 · answer #5 · answered by mommyandbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ur room mate is not to be blamed.
its u n urself.
y u allow urself to be used my other people. if u wont allow then how can one use u. be straightforward.
do right things for right people.
2006-11-20 00:57:42 · answer #6 · answered by bandu1o1 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try saying no. She is using you. Live your own life. Tell her she needs to find answers for her self.
2006-11-20 01:06:32 · answer #7 · answered by F1antasyMaN 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
grow a backbone and tell her you are busy
2006-11-20 00:56:38 · answer #8 · answered by John 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋