My 15 year old daughter is pregnant?

Question

She is 15, pregnant, runaway,still in 8th grade, thinks she is in love with her 17 year old boyfriend. What state can she legally get married in? Am I still responsible for her after she gets married? Can I make her get an abortion?

ok heres the story, my 15 year old has been seeing this boy, now 17, for the last year. this boy has been in alot of legal trouble, enough trouble that he was kicked out of public school with he was 15. and not much has changed with him because he has parents that will clean up his mess. anyway, in the last year, my daughter has been a runaway at least 10 times, this last time has been since august. she has been positive for morphine, she lies about everything, she hasn't finished 8th grade. and now she is pregnant!! she and the boyfriend are living at my sisters house, because my sister is very resentful of me, so she is letting my daughter do as she wants. i want her back home, but i will not allow the boyfriend to live with me. help, please give me advice!

Answer 1

youa re the parent. giver her some discipline

Answer 2

Fact is, your the momma...not your sister. Your kiddo is 15 years old and MUST obey you.

Be positive and loving, but be firm. Tell your sister that if she invades your space again, you will call a lawyer and take care of this in the courts. Oh, consult a lawyer beforehand...just in case.

Get your kiddo and move away from the soon to be ex boyfriend. Start a new life and get some family counsiling. She is rebellious, but you are the momma. Don't be unreasonable, but you are going to save her.

As for forcing an abortion, nope. That is wrong. You probably could since she is a minor, but that might do more harm between you two than good.

I know moving and everything is hard, but don't tell your girl where you are going so she can't tell him. Take away her cell phone and monitor all the calls. Get a restraining order against the boy if he is being difficult.

Also, get a home drug test and test her. If she is positive, throw her butt in rehab ASAP. The baby is at risk now and an innocent baby should not pay for its momma's problems. You can legally do this.

Don't throw her away. Don't let her do her own thing. Don't let her run away. Don't get her married, the situation would only get worse and he may end up hurting her really bad.


Good luck dear. This will take drastic action. You are the momma and she must respect that. You are going to save her.

As for your sister, outside of the lawyer, I would give her one hell of an ear full as you remove your kiddo. Call the nonemergency number of the cops to see if they can help. You have custody and she may be tredding on illegal. I know she is family, but she is making the situation MUCH worse.

Answer 3

No, you can't make her get an abortion. As far as marriage, statuatory rape, and your responsiblity....it completely depends on what state you live in. Generally, you are responsible for her until she marries or she turns 18. You can give your permission for her to get married in many states.....without your permission, it depends on the state you live in.....when she is 16, most states will certainly allow her to marry without your permission if she is pregnant or gives birth.

If you tell us which state you live in, you'll get a more accurate response.


I still don't know what state you live in because you didn't include that in the "additional details". However, since she is using drugs and a runaway teen, she is considered a delinquent. Your best course of action is to call the cops. They will pick her up. Also, contact the Department of Children and Families (or have the cops do it for you). They will provide resources to get her under control because she is a runaway. Finally, if she is staying at your sisters house, your sister is "Contributing to the delinquency of a minor" and "Interfering with parental custody." These are both serious crimes. Call the police, inform them that your sister is harboring them, tell them the whole situation.....it seems like your daughter is in serious trouble and sadly, you are responsible for everything she does. It does not matter if she is pregnant or not. You need to get her back or at least get her into DCF custody so they can control her.

Answer 4

Ok mom. Please don't let her get married at this age. No matter what is going on. Been through this situation. Ruined a family. You need to first of all, calm down. No you cannot MAKE her get an abortion. Second of all, she is too young to BELIEVE that the 17 yr old BF will leave her within a year because, all he has to do is pay child support, and go party. So now, here is the way I would deal with this with my daughter, and I hope I never have to. Get her to the doctor, referal to counseling and parenting classes which YOU and SHE should attend together. So that way she knows you are there to support her all the way. I guarentee, that by the middle of this pregnancy, should she choose to stay PG, BF will be looking for a way out. Give it to him. DO NOT make the mistake of letting the sperm donor move in with you. Keep them apart as much as possible, however, don't be obvious about it. Keep your daughter busy with BABY THINGS. She will come to her sences as soon as she sees BF isn't that interested. I know this sucks and my heart goes out to you and your girl, but the biggest mistake I think parents/people make today is to make two TEENS, get partnered, just because the girl got pregnant. It's wrong, I think if they are still together in a few years, after baby is born, then good for them they are old enough to get married/partnered. Being partnered at teen is too young for ANY REASON. You would just be condeming her to a hard life. Stand by her, tell her, it's her choice, and she doesn't have to be married to have a baby. Let her know that no one could take better care of her at this time, than you can. Hell, you've been there. You're HER mom. She can make up her mind about BF when she is 18, and by then she will be used to raising baby, and a little more sure about it. I hope I helped, take care of all.

Answer 5

First of all, you need to bring your daughter back to your home. She should not be with a family member who enjoys hurting their relative through their children. No you are not responsible for her when or if she gets married. I do not know of any states you can legally get married in young, but I do not think that is the right choice. If she gets married to the guy, then she is capable to get into even more drama with him. Also, you need to take on the role of a more concerned parent in this situation. You need to keep tabs on her at all times, by knowing where she is, what she is doing, monitering who she sees. That is in the job of being a parent. Getting an abortion goes two ways: She can get an abortion by her choice, or you can force her. If you really, truly want your daughter to get some help then you need to go to drastic measures. Take her to counseling, therapy, boot camp, I don't know I'm not a mother, but I do know one thing for sure. I would get my child away from a resentful sister and a guy whom she possibly claims is the love of her life. Move her far away if you can.

Answer 6

"Pregnant Teens: Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Kentucky, Maryland and Oklahoma allow pregnant teens or teens who have already had a child to get married without parental consent. In Florida, Kentucky, and Oklahoma, the young couple must have authorization from a court. Maryland requires that the minor be at least 16. Even with parental approval, many states will require court approval when a person is 16 years of age or less."

Here's the site I found this on: http://www.coolnurse.com/marriage_laws.htm

Once she is married she will be considered legally emancipated so you won't be legally responsible for her but she'll still be your daughter.

You cannot under any circumstances force anyone to get an abortion.

The best thing you can do is be there for your child. Explain her options to her and let her know that whatever she decides you will be there for her. That's what being a Mom is all about.

Answer 7

If she is showing up positive for drug usage, especialy while pregnant, you can file a petition to gain custody once the baby is born. You can't force abortion. However, you can file for custody and give results of her unstableness and usage of drugs. She will try to use your sister as her "stability". However, if you get a good judge, he will see she isn't fit to be a mother. Especially if she is 15 and in 8th grade....she should be a sophmore by now.

When this guy turns 18 years old, I would file charges against him for being with a minor.

Even if you can't "control" her, at least you can give this creep some awakeness.

I don't care how wild this girl is, I would NEVER allow to sign papers for her to get married. If she wants to get married to him, she does it on her own when she is an adult.

She is rebelling and the more you fight her, the more she will rebel. I would place her and yourself into some counseling to find out what went wrong. however, I doubt she is going to change while this guy is around.

What is sad is this unborn baby is in the middle of this.

Answer 8

Wow, I can see how frustrated you may be. However, she is your daughter. What happened to unconditional love. You are responsible until she is 18. How could you even think of forcing her to have an abortion? There are other alternatives, look into them. I know that this is a tough time for you, but think about what your daughter is going through. She too, is having a difficult time. Talk with her and together come up with viable solutions to the situation. Let her know that regardless of what she does she is still your daughter and you love her and you will support her in whatever age appropriate decision she wants to go by. As far as her getting married just to make it all legal, think good and hard on it. Is this the best for your daughter, and grandchild? Only you and your daughter can answer these hard questions. I feel for you and will keep you in my prayers. Mom you will really have to work hard to keep your emotions in check, but in order to be supportive and helping your daughter make the important decisions she must make, you need to. Good luck.

Answer 9

Last question first. . . no, you cannot make her abort without legal aid (and you do not want to go through that or make her kill her child). I do not know of any specific state that will allow her to get married (although there is probably one in the NE USA). If she gets married you are probably NOT responsible for her actions although you might be held somewhat liable for her (not her boyfriend's) financial status. I doubt it though since she is a runaway. Have you contacted the police about her?

Answer 10

I know its really tough, but I'm afraid there is little you can do......and the more you try to do the more you will push her away and you may lose her and your grandchild.

Just be there for her. Let her know you want to help with the baby and when she calms down and is talking with you let her know that you are not happy about the idea of her getting married, suggest she wait a couple of years.

But please, be kind, be gentle........I know its tough for you too but what's done is done, just try to work with what you have.

If she is missing you could contact the police though, a pregnant 15 year old out there on her own isn't a good thing.

Good Luck

Answer 11

Why would you want to kill your grandchild...?¿ Thats the stupidest thing I've heard!! But about your daughter...she needs attention, love and support from her babys daddy and her family! She is going thru a major change right now, which can cause her to be very emotional...! I dont think there are any states that allow marriage under 18. I think you have to have your parent there or their written consent. Don't sign her off to this guy, b/c shes still a baby...She needs her parents right now..! I think that she can get married in kentucky without parent consent, but i'm not for sure...No, ur not responsible anymore, she is her b/f's responsiblilty...!

Don't abort your grandchild...! Please!!! Your grand baby will bring you nothing but joy and happiness!! You'll be glad to be a grandma or mamaw...even tho you dont think so...

I got pregnant at 15 also, but I had a very good support system to help me thru it...I had my family, and my childs father...They still help out, and my babys father is still in her life til this day..! She is now a year old and I'm soo glad that we decided to keep her,
b/c she is the best thing to happen to us..! She put our lifes in order and helped us really think of what we really wanted in life..! I'm now 17 and I am the happiest person ever..! She has changed our lives tremendously...! I'm still in school and plan to graduate, so it shouldnt mess with your daughters school life either, and she should still graduate..!

I wish you and your family the best of luck..!

PLEASE DO NOT ABORT YOUR GRANDCHILD...PLEASE..!!!! HE/SHE DID NOT ASK TO BE HERE, SO DO NOT TAKE AN INNOCENT LIFE..!! DONT TAKE YOUR ANGER OUT ON HE/SHE...! PLEASE!!!!