my best friend Allyssa told me 2 dump him but i think i'm in love with him my other friend Alli says that if i love him i should do it but i don't want to do eathier i always thought sex was sopposed to be an intimate moment betewen 2 married persons idk though i'm stuck help
2006-11-19 15:07:29 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
He treats you like a sex thing. Why is this clod your boyfriend? What you have for him is not love. It's a pitiful attempt to get an emotional thing out of him and it's not gonna happen dear. You deserve so much better!
2006-11-19 15:10:56 · answer #1 · answered by thezaylady 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Haven't you answered your own question? You said you always thought sex was supposed to be an intimate moment between two married persons (I hope you meant married to each other). Hopefully it will last longer than a moment… although that can happen.
OK your boyfriend is pressuring you for sex. If he's being a bad dog and humping your leg then maybe you need to swat him with a newspaper. Allyssa might be right to say dump him. I assume you've told him your morals on sex before marriage and your stand on it.
Of course he's going to try to change your thinking about it. It's every guy's duty. But one red flag you said “but I think I love him” THINK … you better know girl before you give up the prize. There are more fish in the sea… but keep in mind most are looking to spawn.
I think you need to slow it down a little. Check out some other guys.
Mark
Author GirlsTellAll
editor@girlstellall.com
Everyone ask so - (the girl in the photo was the model for the book cover)
2006-11-19 23:30:10 · answer #2 · answered by GirlsTellAll.com 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Damn girl! Your momma never told you about men?
Okay... I'm a guy... I'll tell you what I told my daughters.
1. Guys give love to get sex. Women give sex to get love.
2. Guys have sex for fun, much like they'd go to a batting cage to hit a few baseballs, or go play golf. Yeah, it's intimate, but mostly it's for fun.
3. IF you have sex too soon, then after the sex gets old, he'll dump you, because he never took the time to learn about you. You need to be secure enough to make him wait until you know that he loves YOU, or at least, isn't a royal a&&hole. It's a bit like making a kid wait for chocolate cake until they eat the healthy stuff.
4. You need to re-examine what you mean by "love." "Love" is NOT that oowie-gooey feeling in your stomach. "Love" takes a lot of work and lots of time to develop. What you've got is "infatuation", and what he's got is a good case of the hornies. Seriously -- ask someone who has been married for 25-35-50 years what "love" means, and they WON'T even mention hot sex.
2006-11-19 23:17:41 · answer #3 · answered by geek49203 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If sex is an intimate moment between two married people to you, then that is what you should communicate to him. If he is not respectful and understanding, dump him. Stand by your morals and feelings, whatever they are. It is not love if he does not respect you. There is better love out there, I promise. Don't listen to your friend Alli, you should only have sex if you feel comfortable and ready for it. Plenty of people love each other but refrain from having sex for moral reasons. Not that there is anything immoral about premarital sex, its just what they beleive in, and whatever you believe in is what you should adhere to.
2006-11-19 23:13:39 · answer #4 · answered by pickle_today 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
def dont do it...it ****** kills the relationship...i started having sex with my gf after 9 months...and we had an awsome time right up until then. This is kinda a really bad analogy but its like a game where sex is like the end...once you win the game you dont want to play anymore. And i know relationships arent supposed to be based on sex but a lot of times on the guy side they are...which ya does suck for you if you actually love him. And also if you do actually love him...you should be able to talk to him about and be like listen Im really uncomfortable with this and i really like you so i dont want to put sex into the picture. Sex is pretty overrated...its cool for that half hour or hour or whatever that it goes on for but the after effects are terrible. So i feel like a Mom in saying just say no to him. Your not really in love till you really know it and relationships are better without sex!
2006-11-19 23:18:45 · answer #5 · answered by cthor 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My fiance and I have been together for 5 and a half years. He always wants sex. I don't let him have it all the time though. We get into arguments but in the end he still loves me and sees where I am coming from. If he does not respect you, he does not deserve you.
2006-11-19 23:11:07 · answer #6 · answered by little bear 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may be difficult, but if all your boyfriend seems to want is sex, then you are worth more than that. You deserve someone who loves you back. Ideally, people would only have sex with people they love, but unfortunately, it doesn't always work out that way. I hope everything works out for you.
2006-11-19 23:13:23 · answer #7 · answered by cotopaximary 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is were you really need to lessen to your feelings and if you don't want to have sex till you are married than don't. If he ends up being a jerk in the long run you are going to be so mad at yourself for giving it up. especially if you find a man in your future that thinks the same way you do and finds out you gave it up to some one who didn't care about what he was given. Please, really think about it and do what you really want to do.
2006-11-19 23:13:35 · answer #8 · answered by girlio33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Umm..why don't you tell your friend alli she sounds like a slut and to get a clue. If you don't want to do it then don't do it. Allyssa has the right idea. Don't be forced into something if you are not ready
2006-11-19 23:11:35 · answer #9 · answered by Kevin's Gurl 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Every principle has its own value. Getting pre-marriage sex from wud be also has positive side in as much as u can dump the partner if he falls far below ur needs.
2006-11-19 23:10:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋