Wife Presents Herself as A Hard Core Christian & I'm Sick of It?

Question

Hello yahoo world!

My wife and I were married at a young age and I never completely bought into the whole take the bible literally thing.

Recently I've given up completely without regard for her perception.

It's also interesting when she frequently says worldly comments, etc.

I'm pretty fed up with the whole thing as she's spending almost all of her spair time with her church.

We've been to counseling (not religious), what does yahoo think? Should I leave?

I tend to side with the FSM.

Answer 1

No, you shouldn't leave. You wife has a right to practice her religion to any degree she likes. You need to just let her do her thing.

Answer 2

While I hate answering a question with a question...this is the only way I know to approach this one. Did you know she was that literal with the Bible and that dedicated to her church going into the marriage? If so, then you have to decide whether you're willing to change for her or decide to divorce her being that it wouldn't exactly be fair for you to ask her to change, knowing that she was like that to begin with....regardless of how young you were when you married. If this behavior of hers is something fairly knew and you've tried marriage counseling, then it's probably time to play hardball. Maybe you haven't been forceful and direct enough with how unhappy you are. Sometimes people get tunnel vision and focus on themselves, not realizing the other person in the relationship is suffering. Those types of people sometimes need to be given an ultimatum as a proverbial "slap in the face" to wake them up and realize they'll lose their partner if they don't make an effort to compromise.

Answer 3

I'm not real clear on why you think you should leave? Do you think she is a hypocrite, since you said that she says "worldy comments"?

Or are you jealous of the time that she spends at church?

I would mention to her what you're feeling, which I am thinking is jealousy (your mileage may vary), and see if there is any way she can include you as an observer, if you do not want to participate. That way you can show her that you support her, even if you do not choose to be religious yourself.

On the other hand, if you are just looking for an excuse to get divorced, you need to fess up to it, to yourself at least, and that would be quite sad actually.

Answer 4

People that feel helpless in life tend to grab religion with both hands. That allows them to think that there's a higher power in control. They are actually afraid that all the bad stuff happening in this world is "just because". Religion satisfies that "reason" that everyone seems to have the need for.
Anyways, bible thumpers rarely get "cured". If you can't handle the way she is...Maybe it's time to get the divorce.

Answer 5

I think you better give her an ultimatum and some kind of time constraint for it. I would think within 2 wks-1 month she can get out of certain commitments at church and such and have more time for life. She needs more balance in life and youll be doing everybody a favor to change that.

Answer 6

I am not sure what FSM is but I don't think you should give up on your marraige. Your wife is turning to Christianity because she is getting something out of it. She should respect your wishes and not preach to you if you don't want it. God does not want people that do not want him. I think it is possible to get along and have different degrees of belief. But there has to be a middle ground with you two. You should ask yourself, why does her strong faith bother me?

Answer 7

Your right... you shouldnt take the bible literally... ppl like her are called Fundamentalists... look it up and tell her about it. Visit a priest... try going to different churches... try more counseling.. and see what happens from there.