Oh my God what's going to happen? (i'm 16)?

Question

well im 16 and my mom is trying to force me to see a gyno.she says its time for me to see one.i have not had sexof any kind and i dont want to go to the doctor i mean she cant do that can she. i'm 2 young to go right? what will they do if i go. i do however have irregular periods occasionally and lower abdominal pain but it doesnt bother me all of the time. I simply refuse to go.....she cant make me can she i have a right to refuse. i am 2 private of a person to allow anone to look in the private possession that i have. Can u all please help me out?! i mean i can wait til i turn 21 cant i or do i absolutely have to go now....if i go now what can i expect them to do,im still a virgin and dont see anything that they can do to me :(

Answer 1

Calm down, sweetie. Your mom is probably concerned b/c of your irregular periods and abdominal pain. This could mean cysts or endometriosis. Which is treatable. It is good to go to the gyno b/c they can answer questions and help you with your problem. A gynocologist is a professional-that person is not there to hurt you!! She is there to help you and answer ques. She will talk to you, give you a breast exam (and show you how to give y/self a breast exam), she will lubricate her fingers and feel of your ovaries to make sure there are no cysts. She will put a speculum into your vagina( it is metal and sorta cold). This will take samples of your bacteria to make sure that there is nothing to worry about. Your mother does not have to be in there and the gyno will be the only that can view your genitals. Which they see everyday. This will allow you to overcome some of your anxiety so that when you get older you will not be so overwhelmed. Your mother may want to know if you are sexually active and the doc cannot say anything to your mother. Talk with your mother and ask her the reason why she wants you to go. And tell her that you will go only if she is not in the room (or whatever you prefer). Try to ease her worries by telling her that you are not being sexually active. good luck.

Answer 2

The doctor can't examine you without your consent. Once in the doctor's office, you can simply refuse. However, keep in mind that you will have to see a gynecologist sometime in the next few years, just as a normal part of growing up.

If you decide to go through with the visit, here's what will happen:
The doctor will step out of the room and ask you to change into a hospital gown, with nothing underneath. When the doctor returns, she will ask you to lay on the exam table . She will cover you with a blanket or sheet. The doctor will go to the end of the exam table and help you to position yourself comfortably for the exam. She'll insert a very small lubricated device to hold your vagina open just enough for her to take a look and maybe do a pap test. For the pap test, she'll use a long Q-tip and take a quick swab inside. It'll only take a few minutes altogether and will be over before you know it. She'll ask you some questions about your cycle and whether or not you have had sex. She also might do a quick breast exam to check for lumps.

Go along, and see how you feel once you get there. You might have a nice doctor and feel brave and just decide to get it over with. You might get there and decide you still don't feel ready. If that's the case, just tell the doctor you aren't consenting and aren't ready. Either way, it's your right to choose, though in the end it really isn't so scary and you might be glad to have your mom there.

Answer 3

I was 16 when I first went to a gyn.
They're really kind when they know it's your first time. In fact, I've had polite service 'that way' all my life.
Try not to panic, you're having a trained, caring person do something for you that you can't do for yourself. They're just gonna' look around, and that's a good idea because you might have some goofey little skin abnormality that is the cause of your discomfort and irregularities. Maybe just a quick look will be the end of it. Or, the quick look may tell them they need to look closer, and you'll be glad of it, 'coz not knowing in the case of something going on is wa-a-ay dangerous.
This is just the beginning of your life-long attendance to your 'sweetmeats'. Take an active part and start reading up.

By the way, if you're not a virgin, and your mom thinks you are, ask the Dr. if s/he'll keep that private for you. It's a possibility.

Answer 4

You are actually not too young to see a gyno. It all depends though. Most doctors recommend going to the gyno at 18 or when you first become sexually active. There are many other reasons to go to a gyno other than being sexually active. Some of them are irregualr periods, extremely painful periods, heavy periods, or no onset or mestruation by the time you are 16 or 17. I think your mom *can* make you go, seeing as you are a minor but I'm not sure. You have every right to privacy during the appointment though, and the doctor cannot tell your mother what you tell him or her.

What they will do if you go is feel your abdomen for irregularities, probably a PAP smear (they swab a tiny bit of cells off your cervix and look at them for abnormalities). They will use a child speculum so it won't really hurt, but it will probably be uncomfortable. The doctor might not have to do a PAP smear if you are not looking to go on hormonal birth control. A gyno sees hundreds of vulvas and vaginas a week, yours is going to be no different than any other. Let the doctor know this is your first exam, ask them to explain everything to you before it happens and to go slowly. Ask to meet the doctor outside of the exam room for the patient history.

Talk to your mom about why she wants you to go. Explain your reasons, calmly, for feeling that you don't need to go yet. If she just wants you on birthcontrol because she's afraid you are going to start having sex, tell her that you aren't having it and that you will come to her when the time comes.

That's all I can think of, I hope I answered all your questions!

Answer 5

You sound like me the first time I had to go to one. I cried all the way to the Dr's office! I was 16 too. It's just another kind of checkup that is best to get done once a year. The Dr sees MANY women, and their parts, so it's no big deal to them, and their mannerism will reflect this. You just have to remember to relax during the exam. It's when you tense up that it can be uncomfortable. Your Mom may seem like your biggest enemy right now, but she's making sure you start early in life with good health practices. Just think how relieved you'll be after it's over, and then treat yourself to something after your appointment so you'll look forward to something while you're there. Stay strong; we all go through it!

Answer 6

Pap smears aren't all about if you've had sex. You are definitely not too young if you've started your cycle already.

I know it's freaky. It's something I'm still not used to, and I've been having them for almost 20 years. It's uncomfortable, and it's weird.

At the same time, I don't want to die just because I didn't go to the doctor. They can take swabs of cotton and determine if you have any diseases or illnesses that might endanger your health.

You REALLY should go. She can't make you, I don't think, but it could save your life some day.

Consider it, and if you want, ask for a female doctor. That makes it a lot easier. Also, ask the doctor eight million questions before she does it. Ask your mom questions. Ask, ask, ask. It is YOUR body, and you have every right to know what they will do.

But please go. It really could save your life.

Answer 7

At 16, irregular periods are not uncommon. You can have blood tests initially, if your mom is concerned about your periods, to see if your hormone levels are OK. Yes, you can refuse to go and see a Dr.- that's your right. But it may not be wise to refuse indefinitely, particularly if the irregular periods continue, or you are becoming anaemic (pale, tired etc).
If you are otherwise healthy tell your mom that you will go when you are 18; that will give you some breathing space, and time to consider your options.
Also, look for a doctor in your area who you think you can trust. There may be a clinic which has young female doctors, or even female gynaecologists that you can talk to, well before you have an examination. If you go to a public hospital, perhaps you could talk to a doctor in the gynaecology department there. the more you talk to them, the more you will understand, and probably relax.

Good luck, and remember, this is general opiniated advice only. It should not replace the advice of a doctor.

Answer 8

I started going when I was 16. It isn't really that bad and it only lasts for about 2 minutes. I was really embarrassed but it turned out okay. It is best to know now if you have any complications because if you wait until you are 21 it could be too late. Think about it.

Answer 9

you should start going to the gyno when you begin having sex or age 18, i think. you may not want to go, but you will have to go eventually. you're probably scared and don't know what to expect. generally, the gyno will do a pap smear, which is basically a swab taken from the cervix. it is a little unpleasant, but not painful. it is very important to have these tests done since it will detect cervical cancer and other reproductive problems. know that the gyno is a doctor, and has seen it all before. there is no reason to be embarrassed. i don't think any woman enjoys the annual gyno trip, but i feel better knowing i am doing all i can to remain healthy.

Answer 10

16 these days is alot harder than when i was there.u absolutely have ther right to tell ur mom no,i'm not ready,but i wuld go if i were u it's not normal for u to be experiencing these pains & take it from someone who hates the Gyno visits too.it's a huge risk not to go.it sounds liek something culd really be wrong & i it's left hun it can lead to all sorts of way worse stuff.including not being able to have the choice if u want to have kids one day or not.i'm not trying to scare u but i didn't go liek u & now that is my fate.i'm lucky i have kids but can now no longer hav anymore cuz of all the problems i had.please think about this & do the right thing not for ur mom but for the future mom in u.
take care,p.s. if u ever wanna talk to someone,i'm a good listener.email me ok.
angela w.