Does the character of a man actually matter to a woman?

Question

I'm looking for serious answers here. Nothing along the lines of "duh" or "of course".

I'm just wondering, because I haven't been able to find a woman who thinks that it's important for a man to live his life with integrity. Most women that I know think that it's great when a man is unfaithful, lazy, verbally abusive, and dishonest in general. They view him as being a "bad boy" who has "edge" and is a "challenge".

On the other hand, a man who is confident, mentally and physically healthy, a community leader, intelligent, romantic, honest, and devoted to his wife and children, is seen as "boring" and "too nice".

Why is this? Do these women have low self-esteem and think that they don't deserve better . . . or, do men of integrity have to start being losers in order for women to appreciate them?

I look forward to your serious and well-thought-out answers.

Answer 1

The women you have discussed are the ones men need to avoid. There are a percentage of women that believe that all men are running around with a hot groin in need of them which is false, but there is a higher percentage of men who look for a woman to love that has principles, values, is honest in heart and spirit, and cares about herself is independent, and wants a committed relationship.

It is not anymore unusual for men to find lemons out there as it is for women.I did not find the right lady until my mid-twenties, and keep in mind some women especially younger ones who are immature seem to think some moron in trouble or acts tough, and treats her bad is a great catch. They may be good looking but if they have and IQ of a earth worm and the morals of a alley cat no thanks.
Love is wonderful but it is not really blind unless we want it to be.
So yes character is important and you don't give it up for love, lust and stupidity.

Answer 2

Woman have to grow into maturity just as men do. Initially, young women and girls are drawn to men who are "bad" or "edgy" because they're going off of looks and first impressions. As they grow older and gain wisdom, they start to look beneath the surface. There are exceptions to the rule though, some women take longer than others to mature, and sadly, some women never do. Most women are brought up with the notion to find a wealthy man, and it isn't until several failed relationships later that they realize that money and/or looks aren't everything.

I spent a long time looking for a man who was confident, mentally and physically healthy, intelligent, romantic, honest, and devoted to his family. After going through a few men who were "damaged" or deceptive, I finally found what I was wanting. I found a man who became confident as time went by, learned to let some things go, got back on track with exercise (something he decided to do when we started dating), applied his intelligence in useful ways, learned that being romantic has its benefits, kept his honesty in a dishonest world, and remains devoted to his wife. Some of these other men weren't what I was looking for, but sometimes it takes time to realize that.

Younger women have to learn to look beyond initial appearances, and older women may know these things, but it's not a quick process when trying to determine a man's true nature. Women do want the "boring" man, but they're outnumbered by the "edgy" ones. So, you might be viewing women who are in the process of "sifting" in their pursuit of a man who has a heart of gold.

Answer 3

Yes, character matters. You know what, it is so hard these days to find someone with integrity. Especially, in a man to have all those qualities that you've mentioned, really impossible. A woman would be so lucky to have someone like that, someone to have all those good qualities. But lets be honest, we usually get interested in a person because of his/her looks. Then we get to know them and know their good and bad sides and we get to "live" with it. I think its a matter of choice. some women likes the bad boy image and some don't. we cannot do anything about it, BUT live our lives, our own lives.
You do not have to change, if you are comfortable with yourself and you are not hurting another human being by being you, well, all is good! You do not have to change your ways unless you want to. Its your choice, its your life.
Have a nice LIFE!

Answer 4

Yes, it matters very much to me, frankly i think that a lot of the women growing up nowadays.. well.. they started dating way young... and never got over their 'bad boy' phases, which is all what you meet half of the time in the clubs or wherever 'sudden lust' takes over them...

they're in it for the short and sweet flings... and maybe their scared of a man who will dare to look past flesh and into their soul.. when it seems like they have to paint on a different face everyday for society to buy...

i don't know.. my man will ALWAYS have a character that i can trust and rely on..

*hopefully that was a serious and well thought out answer!*

Answer 5

In short yes it matters. Some women are attracted to the bad boy types because we as a gender believe we can change them when in fact no one will change unless they want to. I believe that being faithful and devoted to your partner is one aspect of a fantastic relationship. Any woman who has a man with a great character needs to count her blessings.

Answer 6

i know that i would not go for a guy who is a 'bad boy' or lazy. why would anyone want to be verbally abused or have an unfaithful guy??? i dont understand that. i think that guys with a nice personality and hard working, smart, romantic are the best kind of guys.(having a nice body and being cute does help). i would totally go for any guy who has character!!!!

Answer 7

Soe women have low self esteem, and allow themselves such low standards. Others don't care. However, most women find a man with standards as the kind of man they want. Most women want a happy family, with a loving and faithful husband, romance, honsty and itelligence. however, they can sometimes be hard to find...especially among the younger generations, who seem to view women as merely sex objects.

so to answer your question, yes, character does matter!!! and there is no such thing as too nice!;) i guess it just depends on the women you find...some want more traditional happy lives, instead of a living hell.

Answer 8

Before my vision went bad, I used to be interested in a guy's looks; character didn't matter. However, now, things are reversed. The first thing I look for is what kind of heart a guy has. I would love to meet a guy with the great qualities of the "too nice" person you mentioned. It's hard to find one, though, who would be interested in a less-than-perfect-looking woman.

Answer 9

Lots of women are attracted to the "bad Boy" image but they usually marry the devoted man in the end because they know they can depend on him and he will be a good provider for her and their kids. Don't give up. Your princess is still out there and don't change!!!

Answer 10

Women want a strong man and bad boys appear that way. What you should do is continue to be a good man, but learn to be spontaneous, take some things a little less serious, talk only when needed, and to live boldly doing what it is you want to do. Follow these rules and good women will throw themselves to you.