my relationship has been over for 18months, I'm too soft to leave My son nearly 19 has threatened to leave cos of attmosphere. daughter has overdosed on pills twice. I know I have got to get out, but only wk part time and cant aford private rent. Husband drinks has been rough in bed when drunk. I did have relation with someone else, more of a companion. Husand found out and chased me with a knife, now neither of us trust each other I cant chuck him out of council flat he has no where to go but neither do I. I dont know what to do. I did leave once last year but came back couldnt live with mum and he overdosed said couldnt live without me and kids did give up drink for 10mths but is back on it.
2006-11-19 09:41:38 · 8 answers · asked by bluechickenrunner 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Look for a battered women's shelter for you and your children. Or try renting him an apartment.
2006-11-19 09:46:17 · answer #1 · answered by Vicki B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Been close to that situation. I married young and my husband was abusive. But he had no excuss (he didn't drink or do drugs...hes just an ***). Anyway, you should be able to get financial aid. And if you have a 19 yr old and this is her dad, well she probly pretty ****** up. IT IS NOT BETTER TO STAY IN AN ABUSIVE relationship. If he kills hisself so what...hes stupid and need mental help. Your supposed to be there for your kids not him. It is your job to love and protect your kids not a grown man. And you've probly been with him so long it will be very hard for you to have another relationship, without the pain. Its something you kind of get used to. It gets better but you can't just turn the feelings off. Sucks. It sounds like it should be sooo easy. People that have never been in a relationship like this talk junk and make you feel bad. But it doesn't happen overnight. It takes time for them to get control over you and its not easy to break away. They tell you everything you want to hear when they're saying they're sorry. Anyway...if u want to talk more you can holler at me. Chatting with people that understand helps.
2006-11-19 09:55:46 · answer #2 · answered by luvy7e 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get out. If you value your life and the lives of your children, get out! He will NEVER change. He beats you and chases you with knifes. Your kids want out and your daughter has tried to check out permanently because you aren't doing anything about the situation. I've been there - done that. Find a battered women's shelter. Not only does it give you a safe palce to live but they have counseling and other sources of help with jobs, schools, low income housing. If this seems drastic to you kick him the hell out. What do you care if he has no where to go?
You need to get strong and change this now before you don't wake up one day or worse, one of your kids is dead.
2006-11-19 09:51:19 · answer #3 · answered by jvcaac 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you saying there's no women's shelter in the city where you live? if this is a fact there's something wrong.
As soon as he's gone call a taxi, take the clothes you can and have the taxi take you to the nearest shelter. Do not tell anyone where you going. Then ask them to call an attorney before he kills you.
They will keep him away and in fact will have him jailed if he comes around, something you should have done Long ago, good luck.
2006-11-19 09:47:15 · answer #4 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who is the "council"?
You need to find a way out. You need to get a full-time job that pays enough for you to live on your own.
And you need to stop letting hubby play the sympathy card. If he's being drunk and abusive then he needs either move out or get therapy (hopefully both). He overdosed to get you back so he could beat you up some more -- and you fell for it. YOU need to go to therapy for women who get into such relationships. YOU. You are as much the problem here as hubby, which means that YOU can solve it too.
2006-11-19 09:47:09 · answer #5 · answered by geek49203 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Get out-Get out-Get out. For the sake of your kids and you get out. Get counseling for you and the kids. If you need 2 jobs or public assistance do whatever it takes. If you have a 19 year ol he can work to. It will get better once you are out.
2006-11-19 09:45:10 · answer #6 · answered by Meme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just leave before it to late... losing a child would be worse...There's lots of help out there find it talk to people....
2006-11-19 10:07:46 · answer #7 · answered by troble # one? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe your son could get a job and your daughter to and help u pay bills and maybe then u could leave
2006-11-19 09:46:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋