is this a good breakup letter? does it get the emotion and feeling across? if not what else should i say?

Question

So I guess by now you know I’m an introverted person and I can’t share my feelings and problems too well. I just hate to make my problems other people’s problems. I went against my nature and tried to show you once and now I’m trying again but for this time I’ve lost hope.

I tried to make this work, I tried so hard and I wanted it to work. I still do, but I guess its time to get my head out of the clouds and realized that it’s just a waste of time. You don’t seem to understand me, and likewise I don’t think I understand you either. I can’t go on like this- it’s too painful for me. I’m flawed- I’m sensitive and distant and there’s only so much inconsideration, lies, and undependability I can take.

These last few days I realized that your feelings for me and my feelings for you are completely different. You are one of my top priorities, but I don’t seem to even qualify as a priority to you. That’s fine, I guess. People have different views of what a good relationship is.

. This is so hard for me because I don’t want to loose you, but I can’t ignore the fact that it hurts more to be with you and not see you and know that you’d rather spend your time with others then be without you. At least without you I wasn’t confused- the boundaries we’re clear and I knew what I had and what I didn’t.
I’m so very sorry if I hurt you, I never ever wanted for that to happen, but I think you will be happier this way. I love you- I never lied about anything I said about you, it was all true but sometimes things just don’t work out the way you want them too. I’ll miss you, but eventually I’ll move on. I hope you find someone that makes you happy and that suits you better. I had a great time with you, but I guess everything comes to an end eventually.

Answer 1

My advice is that you should only send this letter if you are really and truly done with him. Because if you are not then you will lose credibility when you get back together with him. If you are truly serious and are really done, then send him the letter and be done. for real. If you are not and really only want to get a rise out of him, see if he will come running back to you and say he is sorry for taking you for granted then I would not send it.

I am a true believer in the fact that we teach people how to treat us, if someone has done something that has wounded and hurt us and we told them so and they continued to do it, then we must no matter how it hurts not accept ill treatment from someone who claims to love us but hurts us. I think many people who do this are not neccesarily bad people, they are just doing the best that they can, but it does not make it alright for them to do it all the same.

My favorite expression is by Maya Angelou she said "when someone shows you who they are....Believe them the first time...Do not make them keep showing you over and over again" I think that statement is very true. If he was inconsiderate before, more times than not then he is inconsiderate, if those are not qualities you want in a relationship you must be strong enough to let them go and seek what you want, but so many times we have low self esteem and we are used to being ill treated and we accept it as normal.

Until you start feeling that you deserve better than nothing is going to change.

So if you mean it...the letter is great.
If you don't then you are teaching him how to treat you when you let go of your own priciples just to be with a person that you feel mistreats you and doesnt understand you and does not make you a priority in his life.

Good luck

Answer 2

Emotional Break Up Letter

Answer 3

Men and women are very different. You are saying a lot of things. But to me, as a man they sound like you are saying one thing to express something else.

We like things clearly expressed. For an example, I would say "your spending too much times with your girlfriends and I need more of your time" where a woman will say something like, "you seem so preoccupied lately or "are your friends really that important"?

But either way, I would do it in person, not by a letter, unless the person has mental issues.

Answer 4

I think it doesn't really say too much other than you're messed up.

Put the onus back on him with something like:

Dear...

I like you and I thought you liked me. However, I am getting mixed messages from you. You don't understand me and I'm not sure I understand you so for my own sanity, I need to kick you to the curb.

I know one day we will look back and have a great laugh over all this but for now we both need to move forward.

Take care and you will always have a place in my heart.

Answer 5

wow, this sounds exactly like me a few years ago. is he older than you? if i'm getting the picture right, i would say this guy probably doesn't care that he's hurting you,and you are being submissive because your afraid to loose him. it seems like your infactuated with this guy, and your really sending this break up letter because you want him to say "no, i'm sorry i don't want to loose you", i think u'r looking for validation, u think if you can make him care for you than you're worth something. u need to realize that weather he knows it or not u are worth something, and until you believe it yourself, u probably won't be able to have a REAL healthy relationship. if i'm wrong about the situation i'm sorry, but it sounds a lot like what i went through.

good luck

Answer 6

This sounds like a letter you're writing to yourself. The person you're writing to sounds like he's not "with" you, and if he is, he's treating your very badly.

I encourage you to keep this letter and not send it. I encourage you to continue writing to him, but think of it as a journal that you're using to understand yourself better. Don't give it to him, ever.

The people you should be with are the ones who bring out the best in you. They give you the space to be yourself and not feel bad about who you are. They're easier to be with, and they want to be with you.

Don't write to him and don't try to stay in touch. Retake your self respect and your power by focusing on yourself and what you want and need.

I wish you well.

Answer 7

Secrets To Getting Ex Back - http://ExBack.GoNaturallyCured.com

Answer 8

Out of respect for the other person, you should really try to tell him to his face.

Answer 9

Beautiful and eloquent!!!! Just be sure to give it to him!! Never settle as second best whether it is another women or friends....everyone one has time for their friends...that is fine...just never sit as second best!!