High school drop out.....should i take the risk....?

Question

im 16,im repeating the grade,.should i drop out of school,its driving me crazy.i have urinary incontinence,which is very stressful.im on prozac for depression.i lost alot of weight,im uder weight now,i have congenital penis curvature,its lowering my self-esteem alot,the point of an erection is for the penis to go up,mine gets big but stays down.im gay,i didnt tell anyone,not my familyand not even my phycologist.im having gay dreams almost every night.i guess thats what driving me crazy,in school i feel scared and diffrent,cause im attracted to boys.im having trouble sleeping,i also cry alot..heres what im gonna do if i quit school:regain my health completely,wait till im 18,work with my dad for awhile,he is currentley working on his own company,so by then it wiill be open for buisness.let him give me a loan,go to australia,apply to go to a cooking school,rent a place,open a pizza parlour.im feeling so weak.and im going to have a nervous break down.or shall i go do homeschool next year

did i mention im having hair loss....and atempted suicide.....and im starting to drink....

also in school..before when i was in gr.7,my friend persuaded me to play with his dick....and that is making me feel ashamed and guilty...i think that incident has alot to do with me not wanting to go to school now...im feeling scared that it might happen again..after that the same thing happened with my other friend...also after that a life guard let me play with his...and after that a italian guy in the sauna....and the list goes on.....im feeling very guilty for what i did.....and it really hurt me...escpecially that i didnt tell anyone what im feeling....

im in grade 10 now.....there are 2 years left,not including this year.......grade 12 is the last year....it just seems like forever....i also repeated gr.3 before......i also was born pre-mature.....at only 6 months.......i was put in an incubator..i was 1 kilo..

in gr10 last year when i failed.....i spent the whole year with nobody talking to me..and everybody was making fun of me......i changed like 4 schools....the guy in gr.7 who was tempting me told my other friends what happend between us....so i moved to another school.....every school i go,i just dont talk to anyone....and have no friends.....i lock myself in my room,and dont talk to anyone....

in my current school that i go to now......i just freeze when i go.....i dont write,when somebody talks to me i dont answer.....i lock myself in the bathroom......currently in the moring when i wake up,when im suppose to go to school..i refuse to go..and there are exams now...and the school said if i dont come,they will not let me come back,cause i exeded the limit for bieng absent......they also want a paper from the phycologist,to let me come back...i missed like 4 exams..........i feel i just cant continue...sometimes i just keep slaping myself on my face....and im drinking alot.....and i try to make myself faint......i just want all this to be over....

I also have OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder).....and i just feel so helpless.....

sometimes i think of runnig away from home...or get on the next plane on go t another country.....and i try to hurt myself...injure myself.....or make myself faint.....by drinking alot....and im so suicidal....i just need a big break.....nobody is understanding...

Answer 1

I'm sorry you are having such a rough time but definatly do not quit high school, you will forever regret it. Many easy jobs these days require you to at least have a high school diploma, and GEDs are not the same. If you would feel more comfortable being homeschooled where you can regain your health, and figure yourself and your feelings out some more, then go for it! just dont quit now.. you are soo close! best of luck

Answer 2

Have you thought about getting you GED? Then you would have your high school diploma. You could than concentrate on your heath, physical as well as mental. You really need to talk with a good therapist regularly. You sound like you've got a good plan for the future. But why Australia? Don't try to run away from the fact that your gay its nothing to be ashamed of. Even though this may not be the right time for you to come out, you defiantly need to talk to someone about it. The safest person would be a therapist. There are also good support groups, some are even for young adults like yourself which would probably be more comfortable for you. You are going to feel alot better once you have someone who can give you the support you need to get through this time in your life so you can go on to be a happy, confident person. Talk to your therapist what you tell him/her is confidential and the safest person at this point who can really help you. Good luck and I hope this helps some.

Answer 3

hello
everyone is different in their own way and so are u. you say u r depressed and go to bed cying everyday..... why do u do that to urself ....when i came to the usa In high school no one would talk to me or even say hi...I was depressed also cuz i would be the only one eating lunch bymyself in the corner of the cafeteria.. I ate lunch bymyself on the same spot in the cafeteria for 2yrs.. then I thought that if ppl cannot accept me for who I am or what i look like then those ppl are not good ppl....we need to make friends with ppl who love and like us for what we are. u don't have to be embarrased or anything from anyone just because u r gay god made everyone differently and u r one of the special ones and u donot need to hide that from anyone u r who u r.... u pick ur own destiny others or society does not pick ur path of life....be proud of who u r and always think positive that u can achieve anything in life.... and you will always succeed, ppl that look down on u will be proud of u one day and u have to prove that pls stay in school and focus on ur goals u need to start being active and don't worry aout your penis stress might be a cause of that don't feel scaresd in school take 3 deep breaths and being gay is not a problem ok. I have the best gay friends ever and I enjoy having them around cuz they r who they r and don't need to change.
to sleep better at night why don't you do meditation for 10-15min just sit down on the floor with your hands on your thigh/knee and just close your eyes and think of the most relaxing place u want to be at and with who and just think of all the fantasies u have....trust me it will help.... u donot need to quit school if u do ppl will think u r a looser and ur r too good for that.
well hope this helps u

Answer 4

Dear Concerned,

First of all I'm a professional gay male so I understand what you are going through. Highschool is tough for those who seens different.Your body is also going through some serious changes. Males aren't completely developed until age 21 and brain development until 25. So you are extremley fragile right now. First, and foremost. You must !!! you must !!!! Finish high school. It doesn't matter if you have to repeat a grade. Take it as a second chance. Don't quit school! It will just lead to one thing after another. YOU HAVE TO FINISH HIGH SCHOOL!!!!!!!! Relax , take a deep breath and get focused. Don't try to take on everything in your life at once. You gotta finish high school and then maybe even go on to college or a tech. school. Your life is just beggining, you have to give yourself a chance, and that will be IMPOSSIBLE,IMPOSSIBLE ,IMPOSSIBLE without an education. The physical things that you are going thru can be fixed via implants and medication. With all the things your going through you're not really ready to have sex. I know your body wants to, but i don't think you're ready for the aftermath. One thing and One day at a time, don't run off to Australia. if you want to be successful and productive you can do it where you are. You're a young man! It's time to get focused! Stand up! You have control over "YOUR Future" "Your Emotions" "Your Body", take control. You'll find love and true friendship in due time. Imagine if you find someone now, are you in any state to take on a relationship or deep friendship? No, not now! "We" gays start life a little bit later because of our society. Take advantage of this .Just work on you for now buddy, and when your all put together it shines from within and people will flock to you,because that inner confidence and success will be like a magnet. Please take care of yourself and finish school, and be safe. G'luck

p.s. YOU ARE NOT YOUR PAST,NOR ARE YOU A PRODUCT OF YOUR MISTAKES!! WE'VE ALL MADE SOME BIG ONES,AND I'VE MADE SOME GIGANTIC EMBARASSING MISTAKES,BUT YOU GET UP AND YOU GET A CHANCE TO TRY AGAIN. YES, YOUR GOING THRU SOME PHYSICAL AND EMOTIONAL CHANGES,BUT 1 THING AT A TIME. YOU CAN'T BUILD A ENTERPRISE OF "YOU" IN A DAY:) SO O.K., YOU KNOW YOUR GAY!! YOU NOW HAVE TO DECIDE WHAT KIND OF GAY YOU WANA BE. STRONG, CONFIDENT,SELF ASSURE, HONEST,GIVING OR DO YOU WANT TO BE ANOTHER STATISTIC. ANOTHER NEGATIVE IMAGE OF A WEAK, FAILED, USELESS GAY MALE. EVERYONE WANTS YOU TO FAIL MY FRIEND, BUT "YOU GOTTA PROVE THEM WRONG"! DON'T LET OTHERS DECIDE YOUR FUTURE! GUESS WHAT YOU MAY LOSE SOME FRIENDS AND EVEN MORE GUTTING YOUR FAMILY MAY DISOWN YOU,BUT THAT SHOULD GIVE YOU EVEN MORE STRENGTH TO GO FORWARD AND HAVE THEM REGRET NOT SUPPORTING YOU. I FOR EXAMPLE WAS DISOWNED, TAUNTED, PICKED ON, AND TREATED LIKE A F*&(ING DOG BY MY FAMILY. THEN I STOOD UP AND KICKED ***. JOINED THE MILITARY, GRADUATED FROM COLLEGE AND NOW I'M WORKING ON MY PHD. NOW, THAT'S PAYBACK AND YOU CAN DO THE SAME AND EVEN BETTER. DUDE, ONE THING AT A TIME. 1ST START TO LOVE YOURSELF MORE BECAUSE GUESS WHAT MAN, YOU ARE YOUR BIGGEST FAN, WELCOME TO ADULT REALITY. WHEN YOU LOVE YOURSELF JUST ENOUGH, THAT LOVE ATTRACTS OTHER PEOPLE. C'MON GIVE YOURSELF A TRY. TRY TO TALK TO SOMEONE, A THERAPIST, SCHOOL COUNSELOR, A NURSE. G'LUCK FEEL FREE TO CONTACT ME!

Answer 5

It is good that you are thinking about the future but you need to deal with your present situation now.
First you need to discuss with your doctor that the Prozac is not working and that you are having other symptoms like anxiety. If you can get the appropriate kinds and dosages of medicines you will feel better and be better able to plan

Answer 6

ow, sorry to hear that, i hate study a lot, but now i m in the univeristy. i have a very low self esteem too due to the severe acne, but every prob has it's own solution, i m on medicine, n it improves a lot. so i think u should tell ur psychologist about that, make sure he/she is trushworthiness n if u wanna quite school, u should discuss with ur family.just be strong. but in my opinion u should continue it, just another few years.

Answer 7

Yes, start homeschooling. It's worth the peace of mind you'll get.

You will need to get better help for your other issues though. Having more time to think about suicide and such things won't be good.

Answer 8

Wow, you are screwed up! But remember, what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.

Stay in school and get your diploma. Try being a little more out going. Eat some food and go out and party. No one knows at school what you have, so STOP thinking they do.

Even Bill Gates gets laid!

Answer 9

omg dont drop out unless its the only thing you can do it sounds like a good carrer but it would be better with a high school deploma. Hope i was help