Our kid is 2yrs old and he stays with me right now. His mother has filed for divorce and is only seeking visitation on everyother weekend, but I am conserned for his safety because the guy she has left me for is a convicted child abuser, that is fresh out of prison and on probation. He's not a sexual abuser just that he beat his own kids. The last time I let my ex have our son over night at his house she told me on the phone that she had let our son take a shower with the guy. I went and picked up my son and am refusing to give her visitation while she is living with that guy because I dont want my son around him. She also has a history of violence towards me, and sees a counseler for depresion. She does not work only draws SSI, and she is 20yo and I am 25 college grad with a full time job, and the guy she is with is 40yo. We were both swingers when we met the guy she is with. He has kicked out his wife of 10yrs to be with her, and she is in and out of clinics for being suicida
2006-11-19 02:47:09 · 8 answers · asked by jcntx 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
While I personally don't feel there is anything wrong with swinging if it's right for the couple and they do it in a balanced way, a court of law just might. It depends where you live.
I think, if it was me who had to try the case, there are many other factors that would have more bearing on my decision. You are not currently swingers, correct? If it ever became a question, the fact is that you WERE a swinger. Past tense.
Granted, we're only getting half the story (your wife, of course, has the other). But your wife is living a questionable lifestyle, as far as childrearing goes. 1: boyfriend who is 2: fresh out of prison. He was imprisoned for 3: beating children, and 4: he showered with your child (WTF is that about??) and 5: your wife was okay with that. 6: She's mentally unstable and 7: she doesn't have a job. Did I miss anything? Oh, and yeah, 8: she left you 9: AND your child for this other guy. She only wants custody every other weekend? Hell-OOO?? Whatsamatter little lady? Your 2-year-old cramping your style?
Anyway, your experimental period where you dabbled in swinging was probably a blessing in disguise; it showed you your wife's true colours and is probably saving you from many painful years of slow marital death. Swinging was - and is - the least of your worries.
2006-11-22 17:43:19 · answer #1 · answered by intuition897 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a swinger should not even enter into custody. This is your private sex life and does not effect your child.
What does go into consideration is the child's well being, and unless you can beyond a shadow of a doubt prove that your wife is not the best choice for the child, the State will ususally side with the mother. Exceptions are convicted child molesters, drug addicts, prostitutes, etc.
Having a bad boyfriend is usually not reason enough for the State to award custody to you because boyfriends are transient. He will probably be gone soon, too. As soon as real life sets in and the fantasy is over.
Less second marriages work than firsts because you can't run from yourself. In this case your wife can't run from herself and the reason you didn't work out is the exact reason this new relationship won't work out.
Just have a good attorney and don't let your sex life enter into it at all. It's nobody's business but your own what you do in your own bedroom, with others or without.
2006-11-22 09:43:20 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Mostly it is one parent with physical custody and the other with visitation. It can be so disruptive for a child to go from household to household on a weekly basis. It is possible to coparent in this situation. You can allow visitation on a weekend basis, or every other weekend with a few weeknights (like 5-8 pm) in between is the standard.. I think it's great that you have open lines of communication and are working on the best solution for your children.
2016-05-22 03:26:13 · answer #3 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm...a good reason not to swing...
As for the child, get an attorney and let him do the legal stuff to make visitation supervised. Additonally photograph any bruises or injuries the child may suffer when returned to you.
If there are injuries, take the child to the hospital, and then file a police report.
2006-11-19 02:52:18 · answer #4 · answered by OleMarbleEyes 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Neither 1 of you should have custody---swinging in a marriage then seperation with hopefully a divorce to be granted soon. Have it made so there are NO over nights and only supervised visitation where you 2 yr old is concerned!
I hope you've changed your lifestyle not to include swinging in the future unless you're pushing that SWING in a park for your 2 yr old!
You both need to have counseling!
2006-11-19 03:24:37 · answer #5 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Firstly..
Never Ever share your wife with another man...
3somes with another woman invited by wife are OK....
You can bring her current b/f's history up to the judge and
ask that your son be prohibited from visits in homes with
convicted felons...
2006-11-19 02:54:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
call a lawyer,you have to prove he just got out of jail , there might be a restriction on being around chrildren under 18------------talk to his . probation officer,,
2006-11-19 02:53:52 · answer #7 · answered by tysgrandma99 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you and your ex are the child abusers
so fucq you.
2006-11-19 02:50:20 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋