My child is 14 and lives with her Dad in another state. I am very worried about her because she is lonely and not doing that well in school.
I was thinking of going to visit her over Thanksgiving. I would stay in a hotel and rent a car. I would also have to take time off from work.
My friend is saying that this is a burning issue in my life and it would help me to take this trip and be more emotionally involved in my child's life.
I am unsure if I will be able to see her though. My ex and I have been trying to get back together, but now he says that I am selfish and not marriageable material. So, I think that he is ready to move on.
My mother-in-law lives in town and the last time that I went to visit I stayed with her. Now my ex does not want her to talk with me. He says that I cause destruction all around me and am not worth talking to.
I want to do what is best for my child and me, but am unsure what that is.
2006-11-19 01:26:20 · 6 answers · asked by Stareyes 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your ex sounds like he is the core of what your daughter is experiencing with regard to her problems. A girl of this age needs her mothers involvement as well as her fathers.
You 2 need to agree to disagree without it harming the childs emotional state of well being.
Another thing; Nothing would put me in another state if my child was living in another. You need to be living within a closer proximity of your daughter.
Forget about the ex and concentrate on your daughter. I also have to wonder why you don't have custody of her?
Too many issues here and with all due respect, your only issue should be the welfare of your daughter. Period. I would not compromise myself with demands set forth by my ex where my children are concerned. GO there, stay with his mother if she wishes; but for one reason, to be there with and for your daughter.
2006-11-19 01:52:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said you are doing whats best for your child. I think you are doing whats best for you. The entire message was about your ex and not your child. This can be a part of the problem. You jumped to so many different issues none seemed to lead back to your child. I would think of having a relationship with my child. Forget your ex do whats best for your child. Spend some time with her take your friend up on helping you get to see your child. Do not go around your ex or his family this time need to be spent with your child not your ex. I think thats the real reason you want to go for your ex and not your child
2006-11-19 09:43:33 · answer #2 · answered by justturning40 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all see an attorney and get regular visitation set up, then follow through with that on the courts terms. Sounds like you are going to need to prove yourself to your ex and his family, but its essential that you make a meaningful trusting relationship with your child regardless of your relationship to your ex and his family. You will need the courts backing.
2006-11-19 09:33:20 · answer #3 · answered by yeller 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't you have any visitation? If not what makes you think he will allow you to see the daughter? This type of thing needs to be set up weeks in advance with both parties agreeing to the terms of the visit. If you just show up, I know I for one would be mad and not let you see her for spite.
2006-11-19 09:31:39 · answer #4 · answered by netnazivictim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have visitation rights, go visit your child and tell your ex he can kiss your ***, you're on your way.
2006-11-19 09:30:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him y'all need to talk it's very important and that y'all both need to concentrate on your daughter
2006-11-19 09:31:45 · answer #6 · answered by Sweet Thang 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋