There's a guy that I have been friends with for 2 years that I always thought his girlfriend of 5 years was lucky to have him. Anyway to cut a long story short he broke it off with her last March. SO anyway we had been nothing but friends, and had no body contact at all (not even a hug or handshake ) in the whole time he was dating his ex. So I told him I was emigrating to Paris for a year he was shocked and in my last few weeks we spoke every night on the phone. 3 weeks before I left...he kissed me. It was so bizarre but also felt quite natural afterwards. I'm finding it hard to forget him and its been 3 months since I left. We get on really well, we have the same values etc etc. I've never dated anyone I've been friends with first so not sure what to think. I'm hoping to spend some time with him at xmas when I go home for the holidays but he's adamant that he needs to remain single for a year to recover from his ex. Should I wait for him - or find some sexy french replacement?
2006-11-18 13:02:52 · 15 answers · asked by Temi A 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If he is the one, he will still be there when you get back. He is right - he does need some time to recover from the longish relationship. And you are in Paris and should be enjoying the experience, not wondering and fretting about what you have left back home.
If I were you, I would be straight with him - tell him that you feel more than just friendship for him but make it clear that there is no pressure on him - nor you - to act on it just now. You both need some time to grow and develop. Take your year in Paris to do this. Note that he also mentioned taking a year for his recovery. He may be indicating that he will be hooking up with no one else while you are away and that he will wait for your return! So, let him know some of what is in your heart and leave him to think about it while you get on with your life in paris! Good luck.
2006-11-18 14:43:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
awww, that sounds cute. : )
since u like him and u think he is the perfect man u could stick around and see what can happen next : ) (do keep doors open for other opportunties)
i do think he would have showed some interest in u, if he felt that way about u or he might now because, he is currently single : )
or lonely / desperate / or needy for some form of attention.
( i dont understand why, previously you both have never had any physical contact at all. also the relationship u discribed does sound strictly like just friends - i am also thinking u should want to b with someone who is crazy about u, instead of someone who sounds like has never noticed u in that sort of way.)
ask your self if there really is any chemistry on both ends?
and should you be so bothered?
2006-11-18 21:33:18 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is right about needing some time off, its hard for some people after such a long relationship to jump back in. And if you feel that way, maybe it is worth a shot. But wait for him to be ready but what ever you do accept the outcome no matter what it is.
Good luck :)
2006-11-18 23:23:50 · answer #3 · answered by Rulin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Finally, a simple question. Love is chemistry. Plain and simple. Either the chemistry is there between you or it is not there. If it is there, there is nothing you can do to ruin it. If it is not there, there is nothing you can do to manufacture it. Follow your heart and do what you feel inside. You already know the right thing to do. Be able to trust your instincts and you will be just fine. Do not be afraid to extend yourself. If this is not right for either of you, you will both know it immediately and because you are both pretty smart you will conduct yourselves like sensitive adults and ease back gently and kindly so no one gets hurt. - C.
2006-11-18 21:15:11 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Experience and live your life. He actually sounds quite level headed about taking a year, it was a long relationship. You should look at do you want a very good friendship - that you have, or a relationship which in a matter of weeks could be over. It's a chance, a risk etc........but just something to look at.
2006-11-18 21:08:35 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Keep your options open, you are off to Paris, go and have some fun, and just go with the flow and see what happens, a year to recover from his ex, heck she must have been bad...........if you see him at Christmas things may change, but just live your life and enjoy it, whatever will be, will be good luck and god bless
2006-11-18 22:35:04 · answer #6 · answered by donua1022 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
been there and it didn't work in the long term, when you get on just that well you can't have any passion. It becomes very old very quick, but i wouldn't stand in your way. Maybe you'll be luckier than me.
But I've moved on and now I'm with the love of my life, i know this because I've lived all the possibilities. And she's the one, i went through hell to have her (literally).
2006-11-18 22:02:02 · answer #7 · answered by dark.crusade 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can answer that question, no one else can. You find The One when you realize your complete. When you find that special someone that completes your life and gives it all meaning even during the darkest of times.
2006-11-19 00:36:21 · answer #8 · answered by Curt C. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL, to be honest he cant be "the one " or you wouldnt need to ask our advice.
you would know by the first look, his first kiss, the way he looks at you. just one touch of his hand on yours. so just enjoy your time in paris, you will KNOW when you meet " the one "
2006-11-18 21:16:47 · answer #9 · answered by KATIEKAT 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You can't live without him. Would be the only reason to keep the lines of communication open.
2006-11-18 21:06:10 · answer #10 · answered by docie555@yahoo.com 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋