we grew uo together. I married his brother His brother died. We were so close. even though we went our sepatate ways. I still feel love foro him and need closure
2006-11-18 12:56:17 · 14 answers · asked by shoes_717 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
call jerry, he can help you tell him.
2006-11-18 12:58:57 · answer #1 · answered by BiancaVee 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hello, I am going through a very similar experience too. I've been married for 8 years and love my husband but I am also in love with my brother-in-law. In my case I will not change a thing because it would be wrong but in your case I would talk to your brother-in-law about your feelings. If you were so close, who knows, maybe he still feels love for you too but unless you ask him you will never know. Just find the right moment, I am sure you'll know when it comes. Good luck and hope things work out!
2006-11-20 00:58:14 · answer #2 · answered by ZackStar 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should deal with the death of your husband and find closure when it comes to that.
The situation (and maybe you) are too "mucked up" with the death and the brother and the whole business for you to be further complicating things. You say you need, "closure". Closure is about your husband's death. Telling your brother-in-law you've been in love with him for years isn't closure. Its starting up a whole big thing and adding it on top of a whole, old, mess.
You don't even know that you're not trying to hang onto your husband by seeming to want to link up with his brother.
I think you should forget about telling the brother-in-law anything, and move on. Send him a nice note at Christmas time or around his birthday or talk with him from time to time on the phone, but I don't think the particular move you've asked about would be a wise one.
I don't know how long your husband has been gone, but I have been through enough loss of loved ones to know that for a while after they've gone we tend to want to stay close to anyone else who was close to them.
2006-11-18 13:08:12 · answer #3 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is single then I see nothing wrong with it. Just ask him out some night.If he refuses then u know how he feels about u.If he goes then ask him out again and go from there. Don't spring it on him all at once how u feel.You might scare him off. I am sorry about your loss with your husband.Don't let people make u feel quilty about caring for his brother. It happens alot. The difference is your single now so it's okay. Good luck...
2006-11-18 13:07:20 · answer #4 · answered by sweet_thing_kay04 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Is it really your brother in law you love or the presence of your husband...I wouldn't tell him. I think it would only complicate things, and it's probably best that you've gone your separate ways. Cooming together will only stir up those feelings for the one you lost and you may end up sadder...let it go, don't tell him. you need healing.
2006-11-18 13:12:47 · answer #5 · answered by Green Fairy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends. Is your brother-in- law married? If so, then no. How long has it been since your husband passed? If it has not been that long, it may be to soon. If none of the above apply, then do what you gotta do.
2006-11-18 13:00:30 · answer #6 · answered by shyone 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Best way is to write him a letter telling him how you feel, and how you've been so scared to tell him. If he's the man you think he is he'll respond positively, if he doesn't reply or responds negatively, he's not the person you thought he was and you can move on in your life.
2006-11-18 13:01:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would say listen whatever his name is i liked you for a couple years but i dont know if we can date so i can be good friends though so is that ok????
2006-11-18 13:10:18 · answer #8 · answered by loverkid426 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Contact him and tell him you want to have lunch. Make it sound urgent. At lunch, when you start eating(so you have something in your hands:fork...etc. so that you don't look too nervous) and tell him that you are in love with him. Based on his reaction, you'll see how he feels for you.
KEEP AWAY IF: He is married.
2006-11-18 13:01:01 · answer #9 · answered by QueenofLeon 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Some things are not meant to be shared.
2006-11-18 13:01:23 · answer #10 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that this is one of those things that are better left un said. keep this one under your hat, and move on with your life.
2006-11-18 13:23:57 · answer #11 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋