my son passed away last week and his dog is grieving and i just don't know how to help him.?

Question

he was my dog for 5yrs then he went to live with my son because i could not exercise him enough to keep him healthy. He loved my son who died unexpectidly and he spent the last 12 hours with him alone in his home. when they found him the dog had to be put away before they could do anything. Now the dog(a mix of great dane and alaska shepherd. he weighs 110 lbs.) I just dont know how to help him get thru this trama its as bad for him as for me. I put one of my sons shirts and jackets in the tv room where I had him and he just crys and looks so confused. My daughter took him home with her because of my grandson who the dog loved and played with daily but it dosnt seem to help. I just dont know what else to do. It was suggested I send him away to be placed out of the area but I just can't do that. he was raised in my home and stayed in his home and slept in his bed with him and went everywhere with him. I haven't tried any drugs but will call the vet if I don't get any help here.

Answer 1

I am so sorry for the loss of your son. How tragic. The dog will respond to you and your shared grief. Just love him, comfort him, let him comfort you. Dogs do grieve their owners when they die just as we do our family and friends when they pass ojn. The dog will take time to get over this, but like I said he will respond to you. Just be there for him.

Answer 2

First of all... DO NOT listen to the people on here saying that you are more worried about the dog.. They have no idea about anything that GROWN UPS go through...

Okay.. sad dog. Animals feel grief just like we do. So are you are doing everything right.. he is going to need excersize and lots of love. He will be okay.. just give him some time. I know that you have a special place in your heart for this dog because of your son. I get that. I understand that this is the dog that loved your son and that your son loved back. It is completely normal that you want this dog to be happy again. And he will. Let him have a little while to get used to the whole house change, routine change, and person change. Give him love, and treats, and spoil him rotten! On a more personal note.. I am so sorry for the loss of your son. Losing a child is never easy.. may you find the peace you need. God Bless you!

Answer 3

I am so sorry for your loss, and I'm sorry for your dog's loss. To those who feel you should be worrying about other things than a grieving dog, just let me say, the dog and the mother is still living, there is nothing more one can do for the son, but the living need comforting right now. I don't know what you can do, I've never been in this situation and would be loath to give any kind of advice to you in this time except to say, "Feel you feelings, let the dog feel his and share with each other." I'll be watching this question because my BF's dog is attached to him like you would not believe and I would want to know how to comfort him as well. My prayers and thoughts are with ALL of you right now.

Answer 4

I am sorry for your loss. Dogs have feelings just like we do. Your dog is going to continue to grieve for a while until he gets the idea that "daddy" is not going to come home or come back.

I would not send him away or adopt him out. This will only make it worse for the dog.

Keep the dog with you since you were the first one who had him before your son kept him. Since your dog is big, I would lay on the carpet with him and pet him. Give him lots of love and attention showing him that you care about him. In time he will begin to get back to normal again, and you will have a good companion to be with as both of you loved your son.

Good Luck :-)

Answer 5

I am sorry to hear about your loss, but DO NOT send the dog away!! My boyfriend passed away last January in a motorcycle accident, and his dog went to live with strangers for about 5 months and was miserable. I took him back and his dog cuddles with me and sits with me and bonds while I cry over my loss. Animals grieve too, they need to be with other family members just like people. Allow him a few weeks to adjust to the changes and just show him a lot of love. If he doesnt seem to perk up after a month or so, I would recommend a vet. If it is an older dog, there may not be much you can do unfortunately. But my boyfriend's dog is just now acting like himself again after ten months so it really depends . . .

Answer 6

You can get the Bach Flower Essences in the States. Check for Bach Rescue remedy at health food stores, Medicine Shoppes, Vitamin Shoppes, Whole Foods, etc.

I am sorry for the loss of your son. It still has been so soon since your son's death. Give the dog time. Being with you is probably what is best for the dog, especially since he knows you and is familiar with the rest of the family. All the familiarity will help him with his grief. Keep working with him. He will come around, he just needs time to grieve. Grieving is the way to healing. You can help each other at this time.

Many Blessings.

Answer 7

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how traumatic it can be as I have watched my mom go through losing both of her sons.
As for the dog, I am sorry to say that I have seen this situation also, a couple of times and in both instances the dogs have grieved themselves to death.
They even took their dogs to the vet and the vet gave them some kind of sedative.
The only thing you can do to help the dog is to give him alot of love and attention, and hope that it is enough for him to help with the grieving.
It is sad that alot of people do not realize that animals have feelings and grieve just like they love.

Answer 8

In England we use something natural called "Bach's Rescue Remedy" - it is a flower remedy that is good for shock. You could probably do with it - and you can give it to the dog as well. It is very gentle. There are other flower remedies that help with grieving. There are books available to help decide which is the best flower remedy for your dog and for you. Maybe someone imports it in the States - if that is where you are from...?
There are different flower remedies in many countries so there may be some specific to your area.

I am very sorry for your loss.

Answer 9

im so srry for your son.your dog really feels what you feel. he loss a great freind and owner. maybe the dog will get over it i hope. it i s a painful time right now but maybe ina month or twn he will get better and not be so sad. it will make it wost if you send him away you are the lone one who is the closes to him now that your son has passed a way. talk to to him every day maybe that will work tell him you will take care of him and don't be sad that you miss him to and that thing will be ok. may this will help and im srry again about your loss.

Answer 10

My prayers are with you and your family --I had to really think about this a tad and it has always seemed to me that regardless on what some folks think about animals and the inability to grieve is just so wrong--think about what makes us feel better when we loose a loved one--we want to think of them and be close to their personal affects --maybe look at photos or family movies --its not so wrong to maybe if you have a family movie to pop it in and see how your sons dog reacts--you may be surprised--it might be just what he needs--Don't send him away that will only make him feel more lost in spirit--he needs you and others that were apart of life as he knew it when your son was with you.. I don't know about drugs either--I think fresh air and doing things he enjoys would be better than to be spaced out--
I will pray for him and you to be healed-- we as two leggers know that our loved ones are waiting for us after life I haven't yet to date to convey that to my four legged friends --

Answer 11

I'm so sorry for your loss, My Husband died 2 years ago, My Dog missed him dreadfully, I did what you have done with your sons things but this didn't help at all.then I took him to the cemetery, this may sound daft but i told him Daddy was there .we spent a long time, with me just talking to my husband calling him by name. we went again a couple of day later, this time I said "Come on Billy we're going to see Daddy", he wagged his tail and came along quite happily.of cause he didn't see Him, again I talked to my Husband. after a number of times doing this he seemed to get the Idea. we go to see Daddy but what we are seeing is a plot with flowers.in the mean time I showed him lots of Love and attention and shared my tears with him.Is it possible that you could follow the patterns set out by your Son, so life is as close to normal for the Dog as was before? I hope that you are both able to comfort each other, Your Dog was part of your Sons life. bless them both and bless you.i really hope that this helps you .

I Just wanted to add Please ignore those that say why are you worrying about the Dog. these people obviously don't know about loss,

and to those that are saying this please try to understand, those of us who have lost loved ones have to cope in our own way. if it helps us to focus on someone or something else to ease our pain then, then so be it.