My fiancee and I are from opposite sides of town.
He lived 1 hour north of the city and I lived 1 hour south of the city.
When we got serious in our relationship he moved home (and changed jobs) to come closer to me (I have a great job and he wasnt overly happy in his job) and now lives where I am from.
His parents live about 1/2 hour past where he used to live making it about 2 1/2 hours drive from where we both now live.
He has lived out here for just under 2 years now. His parents have not once been out to see him and our house.
We are expected to visit them every 2 - 3 weeks. I have put my foot down and refuse to see them, until they make an effort. While this may seem nasty and unfair on my fiancee I dont see why we have to loose a whole day from our weekend when they wont make any effort?
How do we get them to come and see us?
Am I being harsh / unfair ect on my fiancee?
2006-11-18 10:51:52 · 5 answers · asked by *happyas* 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I am NOT 12 years old, I am 27 he is 35 years old. We have both tried to invite his family to our house, they claim it is too far to travel, however, his mother can drive through our town to see her parents and not call in, or arrange to meet for coffee somewhere on the highway.
I in no way want to stop him seeing his family, he now just goes without me.
To arrange for our parents to meet before our wedding (which is soon) we had to get my parents (who are very similar in age) to travel to there town for lunch!
I just think it seems a little unfair.
2006-11-18 14:44:58 · update #1
i think the road is a two way street. unless they are disabled. or dont have the money or away. yes they should make an effort to come see their son anyway. i'm not to fond of my daughterinlaw. but i do love my son and grandchildren so i tollerate her and go see them.
2006-11-18 10:59:09 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no rule that says you have to go visit children or that married children have to go visit parents. I would maybe try and arrange something once a month or everyother month to meet some where in between for a parents night out. Treat them. If others of the family want to join that would be great but each to pay his own. If you are not married it could be why they do not want to come out to your house. I did not want to go see my sons when they were only living with a girl. I did not go visit until they were married and it was not the same girl they lived with. My mother in law did not come to our home until we were married 8 years. Then she waited another year to come visit then about 15 years went by and then she did a road trip with me when I had been married 35 years to her son. Then we saw each other a few times in a short period of time then we saw each other at family reunions only. After I had been married 40 years she was always rude to me when I went to her home so I stopped going to see her. I got tired of the rude thing. I think I just got to old for her childish behavior. As a result she only saw her grandchildren that many times in her life time. She is an alcoholic and although she asked for the kids to come stay with her during the summer my husband and I decided it was not in our childrens best interest.
2006-11-18 19:11:34 · answer #2 · answered by T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know the feeling, I feel that maybe sometimes they might not like me for taking there son from them or something and try to use this as a grudge or something, but try inviting them for dinner or plan a family get together at your home when ever possible and let them know your taking care of there son.
2006-11-18 18:57:29 · answer #3 · answered by ckayisme61 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what does he think about you putting your foot down as you call it? have you invited them to come for a visit, or do you think that they should just call and say when they are coming?you sound like a spoiled brat if you ask me. how old are you 12? his parents are getting up there in years and maybe they are not able to make this drive. try giving them a call and asking them to come and spend the holidays with you and him. and for gods sake grow up!!
2006-11-18 19:08:37 · answer #4 · answered by here to help 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
why don't YOU invite them over some times may be they are just waiting on you to ask if you want to already start a war with his family just keep your b/f away from mama and her home
2006-11-18 20:27:17 · answer #5 · answered by just_me_1955 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋