This is long but PLEASE bear with me?

Question

Hello, I'm a 23 year old female, whos been diagnosed with Severe depression, PSTD and BPD. I was diagnosed a year ago and I still dont know what BPD is. Anyway not the point sorry, Since January of 06 Ive been in the hospital 4 times, twice because of suicidal attempts. Its been 5 months since my last attempt. The thing is, because Ive tried to kill myself twice and been in the hospital so many times, they took my daughter from me. She has also been gone for five months. I thought I was better, but here lately Ive been feeling like my depression has hit me in the face. Now I go to counseling, so I please dont tell me to talk to one. If I tell her that I am starting to feel depressed, they deffently wont give my daughter back to me. I KNOW that I NEED to be better before I get her back. I dont want to become suicidal again, But how can I get myself help without harming my chances of getting my daughter back. Im lost without her.

Answer 1

I suffer from major depression, ptsd and bpd last year and I have a 7 year old. They wanted to hospitalize me, but I refused and agreed to a 5 day per week intensive outpatient therapy, and a cocktail of psych meds. I am now back to work and functioning quite well. I assume you are single and that is why your daughter was taken away. I have the luxury of being married.

Anyway, my point is this...my little girl has seen me cry, sleep, lay around, ignore her, irritable, and at my worst. I kind of wish I would have just been hospitalized and got it over with and not have her see me like that. My husband and I were recently cleaning her room and found some of her writings and she wrote stuff like "mom is sick all the time" and "mom is sad".

I really think that until you are better, your daughter is better off where she is. She can be your motivation. Whenever you think that life isn't worth living, just think of her. That is what I did.

You are so young and you have your whole life ahead of you and so does your precious little girl. You are sick. Let the doctors treat you. Get better, and get your daughter back!

Best of luck to you!

Answer 2

I am in the same situation, let your doctors help you. It will take a while. Hang in there things do get better. I promise. I have had this for years. I was diagnosed in the last 3 months. I already feel better. Send me an e-mail if you want to talk. I do understand just as all of these other people do. God Bless. I have children too only older. [e-mail]

Answer 3

the best way to get your daughter back is to stay with the counseling, and try medication for your bi polar disorder. If its documented that you are doing better they wll have no reason to keep her away from you. set up visits with your kid so they can observe how you interact with her and stay with it. Bi polar is when you have mood switches from one extreme to the next. go from being completely happy and then in a matter of minutes attempting suicide. lithium will help you stay level. its a happy pill. If you take it like you are supposed to you won't have any more episodes. and in time you will get the baby back. they just want to make sure that she is safe. and in the situation where you were constantly attempting suicide, also is a high risk situation for your kid. what would happen to her if she was in a home with a dead mommy? so the first step is recovery, do it right. doctors notes will prove that you have recovered and/ or have it under control. admit yourself to a mental health rehabilitation center for a med evaluation. that will speed things along.. much luck to you and stay strong for you and your baby.

Answer 4

Honey, tell the truth and take your time.
If you lie about how you're feeling, you'll do no one any good in the long run. Admit that you're still depressed and carry on with the treatment, you will get better eventually.
Social Services WANT to be able to give your daughter back, but only when you're really ready for it. There is no rush, just be responsible and take as long as you need to start getting better.
Good luck and God bless.
x

Answer 5

I'm sorry to say it but the best thing to do is not lie to your therapist. Tell them when you are depressed so that you can get put on the right medications. Once you are on meds you have a chance to fight for your daughter. The judge will see that you have sought help and your chances of getting your daughter back will be much better.

Answer 6

BPD is bipolar disorder, formerly known as manic depression. You do need to tell your counselor when you are depressed so that you can show you know when your symptoms are worsening. You need to demonstrate the you understand the severity of your condition and that you're willing to work with mental health professionals to get YOU better so that you are more able to parent your little girl. Right now, you need to get better and you need to focus on that and showing your counselor that you are healthy enough to handle the stresses of parenthood. This is serious stuff and your daughter needs you to actually be healthy, not pretending to be healthy.

Answer 7

Lets get one thing clear and out of the way first, i mean every word of this DO NOT, I REPEAT DO NOT TRUST THE GOVERNMENT never, ever tell them you feel down or sad, never tell them you hear voices, don't tell them sh!t, trust me on this, i'm 21, i've been hospitalized about 7 times for random things carying from depression, suicide stuff, self mutilation..they don't help you, they do however drug you, and bill you as much as they possibly can, they love it when you go to them and tell them your sad, becasue they are getting rich off of you. For help, you may not want to hear this, but the only fool proof way to get help is God. Most people don't turn to God, another way to try is get a support system going, if you have family you can trust make a list of people you trust and can call, and they can call you, and just make sure things are good. You should probably if you haven't, think bout stressors in your life, for example a person that makes you sad, or sad music, write these down and avoid them, also say good things about yourself, for every negative thing you hear about yourself it takes 40 positive things to make you feel like the negative was never said, never say bad things about yourself..BPD is probably bipolar disorder..don't worry it's just more doctor bullsh!t, it means you have mood swings..who doesn't have mood swings? i'm an honest guy so while i was in the system i told them alot about me, they diagnosed me as bipolar schitzophrenic..the only people i've met that haven't been diagnosed as being something are people that have never had counseling, becasue there's a phobia or a mental illness for every emotion..if your sad your bipolar, if you have a concince or inner voice your schitzo..i just hope all this helps you and i hope you get your kid back, i took this time becasue i hate seeing the government piss all over people. best of luck to you.

Answer 8

Amy, I'm so sorry about your daughter. The best thing you can do for yourself is work on getting better. Hopefully, whatever agency took her (I don't know what Social Services Department handles that in your state) will work with you and help you develop a plan to get her back. Make sure you follow through with any recommendations.

Answer 9

You just answered your own question. Sounds to me like your already on the right trail.......continue to go to therapy and talking. The more you talk the better you will feel and so on. I feel for you not having your child. I couldn't stand the thought of not being with mine. Are you currently taking any medications(I know that you prob. are). If not, look into it. Every little bit helps. Keep a journal of what you feel like and when, what happens when you feel like it and so on. Please just take one day at a time and just think about what you are doing is best for you and your daughter. Good luck and take care.

Answer 10

i think you are more likely going to loose her if you don't get help,you have to talk to some one that can help you,you are a threat to your child,i would also be lost without my boys,but you can not take care of yourself.that is what people are looking at.you need to get on the right meds.first of all,you can't do it on your own.you need something to help control your depression.a lot of people have depression in some form,do what you have to do to get your little girl back.she needs you healthy for her.she can't take care of you.