how do you become more emotional?

Question

my psychiatriest wants me to work on being more emotional befor she gives me pills. so my goal this week to to at least once a day analive my mood. and she said neutral is not a mood. she also gave me a cheat sheet to help me out.

so what do you have to say?
do you know any ways for me to be more emotional?
any thing you say may be of use.

i am not going to use drugs to make me happy...all though i am usualy a happy drunk... my doc thinks my lack of emotions is why i have depressio and why i have a hard time dealing with people...so i need to be more emotional befor i get a relationship. which happes to be one of the things that piss me off.

Answer 1

Look at some charity websites and see if there are any causes that stir your sympathies, such as ones where a tiny amount of cash would make children safer and happier (as an example, see water aid link, a charity that digs wells so that women and girls in Africa don't have to spend up to 5 hours a day fetching disease-ridden water).

If you're feeling depressed and unemotional, it can be because you have problems in your life that you think are insoluble. Its really difficult to get motivated when you think a problem is impossible to solve. Often, solving a small problem or two lifts your mood.

Chat to people in your everyday life or online and pay attention to your words. Emphasise emotional, emphatic words like 'really', as in 'I REALLY like italian food' or 'I would LOVE TO visit mexico'. Think if the things you are passionate about. Which celebraties of the opposite sex do you wish you could meet? Are you a keen supporter of a sports team?

For most problems that you face (such as unemployment, relationship problems, berievement, addications, mental health problems, dealing with memories of bad things in your past, etc), you're not the first person to suffer it, thousands of people have had the same problem and know some good solutions. Ask questions on here about specific problems, search previous answers or google for articles.

'Count your blessings' is a bit cliched, but some things to be grateful for are :-

You live in one of the richest countries on earth, you have friends and family, food, water, shelter, education, free-speech, freedom to travel, freedom to choose your own friends, free information on the net on anything you like, access to helpful people online, etc. Add you own things to this list.

As well as medication, cognitive therapy might help, a talking cure with a therapist. If you can't afford a therapist, you can still read everything you can find on the subject on the net or in books.

Its to do with correcting errors in your chain of reasoning that leads you to assess situations in the most pesimistic way possible, as if you were seeing the world not as it is, but through a permanent 'gloom filter'. Often we react emotionally not to the real 100% true situation, but to what we think is true or to the meaning we attach to events (because of unhappy memories or fears) instead of the true situation.

For example, you might get tearful if you thought something someone did meant that they didn't care about you or love you any more, such as forgetting a wedding anniversary. Your reaction is to what you think it means. If you actually ask the person what was meant, you may find they didn't mean that at all, they still love you but just forgot the anniversary. Check your facts before getting upset and do it as soon as possible, don't get depressed for days then find out later you misread the situation.

Your emotional reaction isn't completely irrational. It would be rational if the real situation was that the person didn't love you. Its just that this isn't the real case. The reaility is that the other person just forgot the date. You were reacting to the meaning you attached to the forgotten anniversary (withdrawal of love), not to the real situation or meaning which the other person could have explained (a forgotten date).

Similarly you may get depressed because you attach the meaning 'I am useless' to being unemployed, when all it really means is 'I don't have a job at the moment, but I might get another one later'. Cognitive therapy can show you how to fix this false reasoning for yourself whenever it occurs. A lot of the work is done by writing down your chain of reasoning on paper, identifying any false reasoning or conclusions and replacing them with more realistic conclusions.

A mis-read situation can be something as simple as someone walking by without saying hi, making you think they don't like you, when you have no evidence for that at all. Sometimes we back up our incorrect assessment with 'evidence' (more examples from memory of people ignoring you, which you also interpreted as them not liking you).

Dr Aaron T beck is the leading exponent and has written a lot of books on the subject (the link below is to a book thats a bit of a heavy read, for doctors really, but there are others for the general public. Search for 'cognitive therapy' in amazon.). Ask your therapist about it.

Another things is that, when you're depressed, you over-estimate the chances of something bad happening to you and under-estimate the chances of something good happening to you.

Answer 2

I don't know how old you are nor the details of your relationship with your mother, but Sag moms are not known for providing a lot of emotional nurturance unless, of course, there are other mitigating water influences in the natal chart. Sometimes being very emotional stems from not getting emotional needs met. An easy example might be as follows: Your boyfriend breaks up with you (Cancer girl). You are devastated and emotionally distraught. You want and need emotional support during this difficult time. You express your anguish to your mom (Sag) Instead of addressing the need for sympathy, kindness, understanding, what you get is a philosophical or dismissive response like, "oh, there will be another, you can count on it." She may be right, but that is not particularly what you need at the moment. So, you try harder to make her understand (ie. cry) but to no avail. You cry even more and become more dramatic. This is not a conscious intent; you are simply needing more from her emotionally........and this highly emotional way of being becomes of pattern of being in the world - your personality. How you can be less emotional is to not go there in the first place. If you know the kinds of triggers that put you into an emotional spin, minimize that kind of interaction. You might also want to tell your mom specifically what you need from her. I need your support; I need your encouragement; I need you to listen to me; I need to know that you understand. This approach may or may not work, but it is worth a try. Finally, you might just need to get your emotional needs met elsewhere than from your mother...........an aunt, a sister, a good friend - idk. It is not your fault that you are emotional; it just is what it is.

Answer 3

She wants you to be more emotional? If she is giving you antidepressants, they actually suppress emotions, [they keep people from being overly emotional], So if she is giving you these, and then tells you neutral, is not an emotion, she has put you In a paradox. Have you considered changing Doctors? Some times people have to try 3 to 6 psychiatrist, before they find the right one to help them. Do you feel that she is helping you? If not don't be afraid to make a change, all the best of luck to you.

Answer 4

If your feelings are blocked, there's a reason. Usually it's fear of being hurt. You probably don't even know how old you were when you shut down, so don't try to make finding out when it all started a necessary step in your healing. Just WANTING to feel is already the first step. Try watching really sad true stories - stories about people courageously overcoming terrible problems. Make sure you're alone when you watch so you won't mind crying. And watch them until you DO cry. Maybe other responders can give you a little list of some good true sad (but uplifting) movies.

Answer 5

-You should try to think of things in the past that could cause you to have an emotional response. Like the death of someone close or maybe a very happy time in your life (even if it happened when you were a little kid!)

-Also try to think of how you think someone else would react to a certain situation.

-Watch a sappy movie like Old Yeller and see if you can let yourself cry at the end.

Answer 6

watch some lifetime movies
spend sometime at a place like a mall and watch people
read a few books
play with some little kids
think about your childhood/past
think about someone you love (or think about finding someone you could love if that doesn't apply)

those lifetime movies should get some emotions though - even if your emotion is "what an annoying movie!"

Answer 7

Did a little digging-I see you are a 20 year old guy. I don't know what you have experienced in your life, so hard to say what you could draw on personally. However, my husband, who is very unemotional, rock-solid, cries every time he watches these movies....Rudy and 8 Seconds. I recommend watching one of those. Good luck!!
PS-you don't need any pills!!

Answer 8

think of things that make you happy or have made you happy or sad and just think on those things. i am too emotional and have a emotional problem and that is what happens to me. i picture sad things all the time and just bust out crying.

Answer 9

Try getting into a relationship with some one.

Answer 10

don't be worried about what other people think of you...emotions are natural to humans...pills do not cause emotions. They may evoke them but it won't solve psychological obstructions.