She seemed okay with it when I told her the truth, plus some of the background about St. Nicholas. I also told her Santa was in all the kind things people do for each other, but not a real person. Last, I told her that she is now part of the "club" of big kids and adults who help those who still believe to keep believing, and she should never tell other children the secret. But last night I took her and a friend of her to a museum and the park, and she told her friend there is no Santa! I was furious. I told her friend it wasn't true (she still believes). How do I stop this before she breaks all her friends hearts (and has their parents hating me)?
2006-11-18 04:58:45 · 11 answers · asked by ice_skaters_mom 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Grade-Schooler
I'm guessing the secret was simply too big for her to keep to herself. Perhaps now that she's gotten it off her chest, she'll keep it to herself with others. She is definitely at the age where they start to figure it all out. I've already had students come up to me at lunch complaining that so-and-so said Santa isn't real (I teach 3rd grade, so I see it every year). It sounds like you handled the situation well. If she continues to tell other children, simply tell her you now realize she wasn't old enough to learn the truth like you thought and that you won't be letting her in on any more "adult stuff" for a very long time. Your disappointment (without punishment attached) will frustrate her, and she'll give up her quest of "enlightening" her friends...not to mention they'll become irritated with her and probably say some nasty things back to her as a result. That'll help more than anything.
2006-11-18 08:14:24 · answer #1 · answered by elizabeth_ashley44 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let the truth set her friends free.
M’Clintock and Strong’s Cyclopædia says: “The observance of Christmas is not of divine appointment, nor is it of N[ew] T[estament] origin. The day of Christ’s birth cannot be ascertained from the N[ew] T[estament], or, indeed, from any other source.”—(New York, 1871), Vol. II, p. 276.
Luke 2:8-11 shows that shepherds were in the fields at night at the time of Jesus’ birth. The book Daily Life in the Time of Jesus states: “The flocks . . . passed the winter under cover; and from this alone it may be seen that the traditional date for Christmas, in the winter, is unlikely to be right, since the Gospel says that the shepherds were in the fields.”—(New York, 1962), Henri Daniel-Rops, p. 228.
The Encyclopedia Americana informs us: “The reason for establishing December 25 as Christmas is somewhat obscure, but it is usually held that the day was chosen to correspond to pagan festivals that took place around the time of the winter solstice, when the days begin to lengthen, to celebrate the ‘rebirth of the sun.’ . . . The Roman Saturnalia (a festival dedicated to Saturn, the god of agriculture, and to the renewed power of the sun), also took place at this time, and some Christmas customs are thought to be rooted in this ancient pagan celebration.”—(1977), Vol. 6, p. 666.
The New Catholic Encyclopedia acknowledges: “The date of Christ’s birth is not known. The Gospels indicate neither the day nor the month . . . According to the hypothesis suggested by H. Usener . . . and accepted by most scholars today, the birth of Christ was assigned the date of the winter solstice (December 25 in the Julian calendar, January 6 in the Egyptian), because on this day, as the sun began its return to northern skies, the pagan devotees of Mithra celebrated the dies natalis Solis Invicti (birthday of the invincible sun). On Dec. 25, 274, Aurelian had proclaimed the sun-god principal patron of the empire and dedicated a temple to him in the Campus Martius. Christmas originated at a time when the cult of the sun was particularly strong at Rome.”—(1967), Vol. III, p. 656.
2006-11-18 05:07:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
As long as your 8 year old knows the truth thats all that should matter. I dont think its right how parents lie to their children like that and thinks its innocent or a small white lie. But bottom line is you cant really stop your child from saying or thinking , telling whatever she wants and as she gets older you still cannot stop her. And you are grown and you got yours and you shouldnt worry about if someone likes you or not just because THEY want to keep lieing to their kid and your different and honest. After all they cant sue you just because their kid believes you. so dont worry if their mad just take care of your daughter and be a good Father or mother.
2006-11-18 05:40:22 · answer #3 · answered by jessika o 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
their is no wrong in saying th etruth b'caze santa is not for enjoyment alone ,but to kindness ,this culture mainly came for spreading kindness,i am from india and her mostly we do not celebrate th eway they do it in abroad but we celeb in our own way by giving surprise gift directly,most of the 8 yr old know that santa is another human from neighbourhood so try teaching the child to spread this thought when she discloses the truth to her friends.because u can make a child to keep a secret
2006-11-18 05:09:01 · answer #4 · answered by doddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOLLLLLLL!
Don't be furious with her, she is only telling THE TRUTH!!!!
When I told my daughter, I just reiterated to her that it is not her "job" to tell everyone santa does not exist. However, if asked, I told her she has every right to speak her peace.
Bottom line, you don't need to send her mixed signals about the truth and who cares about parents being mad.
2006-11-18 12:01:29 · answer #5 · answered by Lady Albritton 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once the secret is out, it's hard for an 7 and 8 year old to keep it to themselves. I told my child that I would only buy him 1 toy if he told. I'm sure he told someone.
2006-11-18 05:03:34 · answer #6 · answered by Debbi 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She's at the right age to be learning about santa anyway. Remind her that not all children know the truth, and telling them can cause trouble.
But honestly you cant help it. This is the age when children learn their parents have been lying to them all along. You cant stop it.
2006-11-18 05:01:58 · answer #7 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Explain to her how, for other children, believing in Santa is part of the magic of christmas and you don't want to spoil it for them.
2006-11-18 06:57:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally I'd give her a spanking but if that's not you say nicely BUT firmly "Didn't I tell you to keep this a secret? You want to hurt all your friends? If you continue to tell others then I will not tell you anymore secrets because you cannot be trusted." It may seem harsh but it'll help. Mable there is a difference between telling a lie and keeping a secret for good reasons. By doing that she isn't learning that concept.
2006-11-18 05:02:10 · answer #9 · answered by 13 year old girl 2 · 1⤊ 4⤋
the correct answer to her question was 'you have to believe to receive' instead of putting her in a position where she has to choose tell the truth vs her friends
have you ever heard of probable-deniablity --- if you do not know it is not a lie when you say you 'I do not know' regardless of the truth
2006-11-18 05:09:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋