Hi ladies only. I am having problems meeting women I am a shy silent person. I love music very athletic love swimming martial arts reading and writting. I've been told I am good looking and that I am a good person. Perhaps I am not the type of guy girls go for. I suffer from depression and low self esteem I just want to meet some one to help me with my lonliness. I am a nice guy but do nice guys really finish last?
2006-11-18 03:39:48 · 33 answers · asked by davidleeryan 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
nice guys dont finish last, but guys with low self-esteem do.. if you dont like yourself, how do you expect anyone else to like you. challenge yourself and you will learn to like yourself more. the opposite sex will notice you when you like yourself...
2006-11-18 03:42:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
David I'm only answering this cos that lefty (old crone) had a go. Anyway being silent isn't a good idea, I know that. However I'm not sure about the rest of it. Lefty (olde crone) said we like Alpha men, But I'm not sure what they are really. It seems to me that in the chat room i used to frequent with Lefty(olde crone) the loud men aren't really very nice to their women e.g. they aren't faithful to one woman and they are promiscuous. Anyway that's the impression they give, of course it may be all made up .
So this raises questions for me. What is and ALPHA man in the first place?
In your case I really think you need to combat the self esteem issue, which may be part of the depression. It might help you to do some things that you really shy away from, perhaps you aren't letting these women you seek see you?
sometimes when you win you lose.
2006-11-19 03:27:08 · answer #2 · answered by : 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think that nice guys finish last, I think your looking in the wrong places. First you have do something about your depression and low self esteem, ever thought about counselling? I did a course in it and I found it so helpful and it does help people. I was lonely when I split with my ex but then all my friends came and helped me and maybe if you tell your friends, they would come and help you.
Never give up on life or love because you never know whats around the corner.
2006-11-18 04:52:23 · answer #3 · answered by xx angel 3m xx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there's no reason for such a well rounded guy like you to be suffering from depression and low self esteem! what girl cant like a guy who is smart, good looking and nice? and i personally think its really cute when a guy is quiet and shy (just as long as when you get to know them you can acutally have a conversation with them).
unfortunately nice guys do finish last BUT all their waiting pays off in the end becuase they end up finding the girl of his dreams. i know how you feel even though im a girl, im pretty shy if i dont know a guy and im not a total flirt and it seems like all the flirtatious girls have all the guys after them but i just wait for the right one to come along and itll be all worth it in the end!
go to museums or coffee shops or book stores to meet some good looking, intellectual people like you! (in my opinion, thats where alot of the good looking boys are at :D
hang in there and take care!
2006-11-18 03:51:22 · answer #4 · answered by ... 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice guys dont finish last but low self esteem does not help..i should know!
Most women, sorry for the generalisation, are after an alpha male who will stand back and let their partner take a stand too...hypocrital? yes but basically that is what we want.
You sound like a lovely man...and with your looks/intelligence and althetic body - plus your sensitivity you should have no bother getting a nice lady. Just dont jump at the first..take your time and find the perfect lass for you.
Keep smiling and looking into eyes... :0) you will find the one for you soon.
2006-11-18 04:22:54 · answer #5 · answered by theoldecrone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a great guy. You do need to get through the feelings of low self-esteem & depression, though. Any new girl will not put up with this intensity at the beginning of the relationship.
Discover great ladies at bookstores.
2006-11-18 03:47:06 · answer #6 · answered by Daiquiri Dream 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
eyes :)
if u have low self esteem you should try and do something about that! u shouldnt put you're self down, i am sure u r great!!
Next time you like a girl, just make eye contact and if you want start talking to her! what do you have to lose!! And in general girls like shy guys, but not to shy, just talk to her like you talk to a friend, smile at her and complement her on her outfit or tell her she has beautiful eyes or hand, whatever you like about her!!
Just go with the flow and if it doesnt work out, it might with the next one.
what i like in a man: he has to be able to make me laugh, be caring, thoughtfull, shy, and spontaneous!!!
But every girl has her own type :) and i am sure that you will find yours!!! just when you arent looking....
Good luck and dont be depressed, be happy becuase happy people are a lot more attractieve then depressed people!!!!
I am sure u will be fine :)
2006-11-18 03:50:23 · answer #7 · answered by Simone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice guys get girls with a taste for nice people.
Dont beleive people who said girls like bad boys, not all of them do. The most who does love the thrill but not the bad attitude, trust me.
Dont stop being nice, but start being full of surprises and interesting. You can be shy, but you should also try to be confident.
Dont turn bad just to have a girl...thats just so lame and so practically despereste.
You'll find someone who luvs you for who you are, and you dont have to change the nice way you are for anyother girl who doesnt appreciate you...
Nice guys do finish last...they finish last for the best...
2006-11-18 03:47:32 · answer #8 · answered by rhea 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
nice guys dont finish last. nice guys are the ones the girls always want to end up with in the long run and the gits that we date before meeting u just help us see how great a nice guy is.
maybe ur looking too hard, it really is true - u meet someone when u least expect it x
2006-11-18 04:07:59 · answer #9 · answered by keeley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what most attracts girls i think is the way a guy carries himself. if you have low self confidence like you said, girls pick up on that in a second without even really knowing it. I cant think of anything else that is a bigger turnoff than when i see a guy with slouched shoulders, head down, feet shuffling, and will not look you in the eye. just look at your self and be honest to yourself if you do any of that. if you do then i think that is something that you should work on. confidence is soooo sexy in a guy and it is a must!!!! good luck to you :)
2006-11-18 03:47:27 · answer #10 · answered by ~annie~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I could help u..
but I dont allow IM or give out my msn....
sorry
but anyway..if ur shy..than u need to cool down
be confedent about urself..
talk to a girl but in a funny way
make her laugh...dont say stupid stuffs
u can start....
hey..can I have ur opinion over something?
my friends and I want to know what most ladies look up foe a guy?
she'll answer u then...say thnkx
then go back to ur friends without none of use look at her
show her u were really serious about what u were talking about
and the rest honey.............
its up to u
2006-11-18 03:47:27 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋