Me and my gf have been dating about 6 months now, be both lost our virginity to each other about a month ago, or so she says. She swars up and down that she was a virgin, but she dated her last bf for a year and a half, and it seems odd to me that they dated a year and a half and she says nothing happened and she did me in 3 months. And when i asked her ex bf about it he said it was up to her to say if they did or did not have sex. I hate being lied to so this is important to me. Should i bother digging up a past that she probably is not proud of or how can i get her to tell the truth.
Please give me some advice i really want to know the truth.
2006-11-18 00:35:29 · 16 answers · asked by armorefelix 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
If you didn't trust her you wouldn't be asking her ex and why does this bother you so much? Sounds like you have doubts about her past. Either accept her story or move on to someone you can trust.
2006-11-18 00:55:05 · answer #1 · answered by Minot_1997 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow this is a really hard question to answer. Yes, it IS odd that she's saying she's a virgin even though they dated for so long. And judging by the fact that her ex didnt want to answer you, maybe they DID have sex. Tell her that this is really important to you. To have a good relationship, you should be open to each other. Tell her that she shouldn't be ashamed of the truth, and you have to know that you can trust her.
Maybe she's lying because she's scared that you may reject her, lose respect for her or wouldn't wanna have sex with her if she tells you that they did have sex. Assure her that you will not change your mind about her in any way whether she did have sex with her ex or not.
Good luck. I hope this turns out well. =)
2006-11-18 08:42:38 · answer #2 · answered by rockmyworld101 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when i lost my virginity it was after we went out for over a year and a half and then broke up, my next (and last) boyfriend it was after a month. but sex for me is different, i have to love someone to have sex with him, not to say that i didn't love the guy i lost my virginity with, but i wasn't ready and i knew it.
i wouldn't pursue it. if she doesn't want to tell you, she won't, and i don't know why it's that big of a deal anyway. like if a girl is not a virgin she's not good enough?
and if you stop asking about it you'll stop getting lied to.
2006-11-18 08:43:00 · answer #3 · answered by pikachu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Understandable that you wanted your first time to be special. It obviously went to mud because it only took you guys 3 months to get it going. Question, were you hoping to make it special when you lost your virginity? because 3 months of dating and then losing it seems quite fast. So why bring up the suspicion she might be lying to you about losing her virginity? She probably wasn't a virgin and lied to you because you may make her feel like you are judging her. Which to me sounds a bit like it could be the case. Why find out if she is lying? she probably trying to keep her dignity here lol. And nobody is perfect, she might have lied because she wanted to please you, not to hurt you. Hey when I first slept with my partner he told me he wasn't a virgin. But he was lol and I asked him why he lied and it was because he wanted to impress me. Which kind of kicked me in the head, if I knew he was a virgin I would of made it much more special! lol
2006-11-18 08:53:20 · answer #4 · answered by Starjarus 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why would you want to dig into the past. If you really like this girl and she is the one you want to be with then forget it. She is with you now and that's what matters. She is probably not lying to you. But if you continue doubting her, you may turn her off and she may just end up dumping you. Especially since you're going to her ex to find out. That's a bit much.
So if you want to continue this relationship, take her word and concentrate on today.
2006-11-18 08:40:20 · answer #5 · answered by BluePassion 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i also hate to be lied by the people i care about but i think u should believe her. if her ex didn't tell u anything maybe sth happened after all. it was her decision not to tell u and maybe she had her reasons... if u love her u should think only about the present. also, for some virginity doesn't matter very much today. the fact that she loves u is the most important in my opinion
2006-11-18 08:52:27 · answer #6 · answered by alexandra s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first you would know if she was a virgin / trust me, second who really cares , never understood this virgin thing in my life it has to be some type of ego ,,,,,I am 51 yrs old cant honest say if I had a virgin or not but it never concern me just that my mate loves me and I love her and this is all should count, stop wasting energy in this quest and move on to building something special / I believe what was before you is yesterday news . move on
2006-11-18 08:44:58 · answer #7 · answered by rev frank 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all you shouldn't be going to her ex about their sex life. If her ex is any kind of respectable man he won't be spreading what they shared as a couple in the street. If you don't trust her then don't date her.
2006-11-18 08:39:58 · answer #8 · answered by ~Leading Lady~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How cares wheter she slept with her ex???? if you love her and she loves you, u are very lucky, dont go looking for trouble!!
if she is nice to you and not sleeping with anyone else then you right now i dont see what good it would do if you found out!! its in the passed, it can be changed, dont go looking for trouble, but beb happy with what you have right now, because when its gone you will be kicking yourself for it!!!
2006-11-18 08:41:40 · answer #9 · answered by Simone 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What difference does it make if she was a virgin or not. Leave it be or you'll find yourself alone. It's not worth it. All that matters is that she loves you, so quit trying to find out.
2006-11-18 08:37:49 · answer #10 · answered by Jer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋